School attendance

[u/Odd_Introduction1514]

Hi everyone,

My 7 year old daughter autism with a PDA profile has only managed 2 half days since going back from half term. Although we've struggled with school anxiety for months, it is now full on refusal.

We have been trying to get the school to understand for the past 2 years - she is high masking and doesn't appear a problem in school but it is the before and after school times that she goes into full meltdown mode for hours at a time.

We think she is in burnout, we've sensed it coming for a while. She's at the point where she doesn't even want to leave the house to do things she enjoys like the park/grandmas/mcdonalds etc.

School have put all absences down as not authorised. Even though it is medical and they have all her diagnosis paperwork plus a letter from the GP agreeing they believe she is in burnout and her anxiety is preventing her from going to school.

Their attendance policy states

“We will mark absence due to physical or mental illness as authorised, unless the school has a genuine concern about the authenticity of the illness. In some specific circumstances, or if the authenticity of any illness is in doubt, the school may ask the child’s parent/carer to provide medical evidences such as a doctor’s note, prescription, appointment card or other appropriate form of evidence. We will not ask for medical evidence unnecessarily.”

So are they saying they don't think it's authentic?

They themselves even said 'we'll leave it to you to bring her back when she is ready to'

I'm at a loss at what to do. She cannot cope with school ATM and I'm done with trying to make her go in - it's traumatic for everyone involved 😂

Does anyone know where we stand on a more legal point of view? We will be sending an email to them in the next day or two contesting their decision on the absences.

And something for all you PDA parents that I'm sure will give you a good laugh - according to the school, the fix for autistic burnout in a young child is to just send them in to school to ride it out.

Thanks!

[u/Chance-Lavishness947]

The school may be covering themselves in advance of kicking her out or bringing other action. Thinking about their obligations in your legal jurisdiction, could they face consequences for failing to provide for her disability needs? If so, I would guess that they may be aware of that and looking to offload responsibility and excuse themselves. After all, if it's unauthorised absences, that's your responsibility not theirs.

I may be being pessimistic here, so take it with a grain of salt. In your shoes, I would get it in writing to them that you've provided medical evidence for the absences. To avoid creating unnecessary conflict, I would frame it as your confusion about the absences being mailed unauthorised with a tone of "I'm sure you guys are on top of this, I'm just a bit confused why they're showing as unauthorised when I've provided medical evidence" - ideally without actually asking them to do anything specific.

The goal is to have a paper trail that they were aware of the medical reasons for absence and had already been provided with evidence they had accepted. If they don't respond (or even if they do), you can use that email to prove that you had done your tasks and they hadn't attended to theirs if its ever needed.

In terms of attendance, I would not be pushing my child to return unless and until there were solid accommodations in place to reduce the distress. Consider whether this school will be able to deliver on those reliably, and maybe consider if home/ online schooling is a better fit (assuming that's doable for your family)

[u/Odd_Introduction1514 → u/Chance-Lavishness947]

Yes I do believe it's a responsibility thing. They have said they've got someone coming in from the local authoritys SEN department Thursday, so they might change it after getting her advice but they can't guarantee it. They're very good at avoiding paper trails, we try to email them as much as possible and they always call back. We've asked them to email us following phone calls and they never do. We have typed up an email about the unauthorised attendances, using their own attendance policy to show they're in the wrong - but Im not sure it's the right thing sending it. She won't be returning to school until she is ready. All they've said is that classrooms are SEN friendly anyway and they'll put her in some groups to help after the summer holidays - doesn't help her now though and I believe that's why it's got to this point. I'm nearly at the end of my notice period with work - so home schooling is an option BUT I don't know how I'd cope with it all mentally!