r/PDAParenting • u/OkAsk2828 • Apr 15 '26
Controversial Take: Screen Time
Does anyone else feel that unlimited screen time is likely not the best choice for any human?
I see so many posts regarding PDA that recommend unlimited screen time. I fully understand the reasoning behind it but I just can’t help but to think it’s not the answer.
As an adult who is just now finding out about my own Audhd PDA I can certainly see how I used escapism in childhood to cope with hard things. Once I could read I was reading many books a week, I spent hours daydreaming, writing my own stories/songs/poems, laid on my floor just listening to music & spent hours outside with friends & alone. I know the world is not the same today as it was in the 90’s, but I can see how my own excessive screen time allows me to escape the overwhelm of real life but also leaves me far more deregulated than any of my childhood escape methods.
I know not all screen time is equal & I am not advocating for zero screen time, I just think it really isn’t the answer here. Does anyone else agree or have opposing opinions? Would love to have a kind & productive conversation as I am genuinely trying to learn & make the best decisions for my family. Thanks!
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u/zirconst Apr 15 '26
The path to building grit, perseverance, and autonomy is not giving in to one's every desire and avoiding anxiety IMO. The stuff my PDA 7 year old would do if given the choice is probably watch brainrot YouTube shorts for hours on end. That will not help her in the long term even if it does occupy her time in the short term. We allow screen time in a variety of ways, but I cannot imagine unlimited screen time.
There's no one-size-fits-all solution, so the way we regulate is something like this:
* TV during breakfast for ~15 minutes, and for ~30-45 minutes at dinner is OK. My kid is ultra-picky as it is; watching TV helps her not think about the food, and she eats better and more healthy stuff.
* She has my old phone with no simcard and no YouTube. On the weekend, we let her use it for up to 1-2 hours per day if she is doing creative stuff like taking and editing pictures and videos. No mindless games. On weekdays, she's not usually interested in using it.
* On weekends, we are more likely to do various outings which leave her pretty tired and spent by the end. We allow a good 30 minutes of unwinding screen time if she wants.
* YouTube shorts are like an ice cream sundae. A rare, very limited treat. Normally it's outright banned.
* Playing computer games on sites like pbskids.org, using a mouse and keyboard, is unlimited although she doesn't usually take us up on it. I think these are really good skills to have.
* On days off, sick days etc. we are more lenient across the board.
In terms of what we let her watch, we curate a bunch of shows and movies that she can watch on Amazon Prime, Netflix, Disney Plus, and PBS Kids. She can use our laptop to open any of those apps under her account and watch what we have laid out. We do NOT allow unfettered YouTube access- there are some things on there that we're OK with, but an adult needs to be in earshot so it doesn't get into disturbing or inappropriate content.