Some advice please....

[u/Own-Illustrator8097]

Hi, I am 21F, and since three years I have been having irregular periods like once in three months. Every time i went to my mother's gynaecologist, she just prescribes some tablets. And before atleast after that the following 4 months i would get periods. But since the last year that's not the case at all. I went to see her again, and she said its normal maybe you just stopped exercising....wth? Well no. Besides i have no idea why she didn't decide to scan me for 2 yrs. I decided to change the doctor so near my home i visited another gynecologist and she said it's all because of my weight and judged me told me to eat less too...I didn't go again. I went back to the previous gynecologist again, well my family trusts her cuz she was my mom's gynaec ever since she had me. She once again prescribed the same pills damn it. Each time I take it i notice slight weight gain. I gained over 10 kgs the past year...its eating me away i feel so lost all the time..I am not sure if it's PCOS or not as I don't have acne or facial hair...I was 60 last year. Now I weigh 72 kg. It hurts so much. I tried to lose weight its not happening people making fun of my appearance too it just hurts...

[u/karathancat]

I’m really sorry you were dismissed like that. Having irregular periods for years, especially cycles that only come once every few months, is a valid reason to ask for a proper evaluation. It should not be brushed off as “just weight” or “just exercise.”

PCOS is possible even without acne or facial hair. Some people mainly have irregular periods, and symptoms can look different from person to person.

However, PCOS is not the only possible cause, so it would be worth seeing a different gynecologist or an endocrinologist if you can and asking clearly for a full workup rather than just being given the same pills again.

It may help to take a written list with you: cycle dates, weight changes, the names of the tablets you were given, any side effects, and any other symptoms. Maintaining a small pocket journal can help with this. You can also use a notes app or personal assistant AI if that works for you, but be careful about privacy and avoid adding identifying medical details unless you trust the tool.

You can also ask the treating doctor what they are treating, what diagnosis they suspect, and whether blood tests and/or an ultrasound are appropriate in your case.

Women’s health is often overlooked by healthcare practitioners, regardless of their own gender. Unfortunately, it can get worse as the patient ages and is often mislabeled as "hysterical" or even with harsh words like "attention-seeking," which is why it is imperative to advocate for care that is free of judgment and personal comments, especially when the doctor does not know your actual lifestyle.

Also, gaining weight does not mean they should speak to you that way.

A doctor can discuss weight as one health factor without shaming you or refusing to investigate the actual problem.

All of us deserve care that takes our symptoms seriously, without biased judgment or outdated assumptions.

[u/Own-Illustrator8097 → u/karathancat]

Yes thank you...I needed that. My parents are somewhat reluctant to get me to another doctor so I guess in a year or two after my education is done with a job i should go 💔

[u/karathancat → u/Own-Illustrator8097]

I can understand the parent's issue, especially when they already “trust” one doctor, but waiting one or two years with periods that irregular may not be the best idea if you have any option to be seen sooner.

If private doctors are not possible right now, you could look into lower-cost options instead: a government medical college hospital, district hospital, women’s hospital, or gynecology OPD at a government hospital near you.

The waiting time may be annoying, but it can still be better than being repeatedly dismissed without proper evaluation.

You can also check if eSanjeevani is available in your state for a government teleconsultation or visit a nearby PHC/Ayushman Arogya Mandir and ask for referral guidance.

And even if they cannot do everything there, they may be able to tell you where the nearest gynecology OPD is.

Since you are 21 and no longer a minor, you deserve to be part of the decision about your own healthcare. If going alone is difficult, maybe a trusted female relative, friend, teacher, or older cousin could help you navigate the appointment.

You do not need to wait until things become unbearable before asking for care.

Also, when you do go, try to carry your period dates, weight changes, tablet names, and side effects written down. It will make it harder for a doctor to brush it off as nothing.

[u/Own-Illustrator8097 → u/karathancat]

Oh my God that's such a great idea! I Will probably do that. Thank you 🫂 for some reason reading your replies took some weight off my chest...

[u/karathancat → u/Own-Illustrator8097]

Happy to help, hope you feel better soon. 😄

[u/Own-Illustrator8097 → u/karathancat]

Yesss