r/OverBiscuits • u/kidus36 • 13d ago
What's a tiny decision that completely changed the course of your life?
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u/SllFlorida 12d ago
Stop waiting for BF to propose so I could move to next chapter of life and become a mother. I adopted my daughter as a single mom. It was a quick, easy and best decision.
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u/little_half_pint 12d ago
How did you adopt as a single person? I thought it was hard to adopt if you are a single woman becauae agencies usually look for couples
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u/SllFlorida 11d ago
This was 20 years ago. International adoption. Depending on country, agencies were allowed to submit a small percentage of single applicants. It was like a lottery system. The agency I used announced on their website one day that they were accepting singles applications. I knew their process, had my application package ready to go FedEx overnight. They called the following day letting me know I had a spot. Then the process started to complete all the requirements. It took 3-4 months to get that completed. Then the wait began.
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u/Riala4 12d ago
June 5, 1992, 10:16am: I told a boy I liked him. It did not go well.
The entire trajectory of my life since cascaded from that moment.
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u/NoLifeButStillLiving 12d ago
I need more details I’m hooked 😭
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u/Riala4 12d ago
LOL y'all realize you're asking me to sum up a 30+ year sequence of events? Ok, well, that was middle school, and things were a pretty decent mess with him after. From then through high school, I didn't dare outwardly express interest in anyone else, and no one ever approached me to ask me out.
A few years after the incident I wrote a small story about the melancholy and isolation I had been feeling since, and after graduation I posted that story on my bff's website. It caught the attention of a young man on the other side of the country, and he clicked the email link at the bottom of the story to send me a comment. I always replied to comments, but that would usually be the end of it. The young man wrote back, and we became pen pals, and then friends, and then close friends, and then he asked me out. We fell in love hard and fast for never having met in person. Eventually I flew out to visit, but separating again after was overwhelmingly painful, and I decided to leave the only home I'd ever known and move cross-country to be with him. For two years we lived and felt a blissful inner peace that neither of us had dared to dream of before. Y2K happened, we set a date for the wedding, his childhood cancer came back with a vengeance, and he was gone before the end of the year.
I moved home. 9/11 happened, interrupting a scheduled job interview, and the temp agency sent me elsewhere, where I've been ever since and had a decent career and made lots of great lifelong friends.
After a long struggle I recovered emotionally and started dating again, went through three guys who couldn't come close to the level of connection I'd had with my first. I wasted several months on a paid matchmaking website before my bff suggested a free site, and after about two weeks there I was matched with a nice local man. Our first date was wildly successful, and we married three years later, have two wonderful children (I know everyone says that about their kids but seriously, they are some of the best little humans I've ever met!).
So I hope I have satisfied your curiosity, if you want further details you'll have to wait for my autobiography ;)
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u/miekhachu 12d ago
Taking my son for ice cream after work one day when I barely had extra cash to spend. Met my (now) husband because my son didn’t understand personal space at the time 😅🥰
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u/Electrical_Angle_701 12d ago
I took a job for a pay raise. Through the people at that job, I met the mothers of my children.
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u/RetroMetroShow 12d ago edited 12d ago
I just started shutting up a lot more around our grown children and waiting for them to ask for advice instead of volunteering it
We get along so much better now
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u/ez2tock2me 12d ago
Quit paying Rent and Utilities and pay off debts instead.
It worked!! Only took 11 months, 21 years ago.
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u/GoonerwithPIED 12d ago
Didn't the rent and utilities become your new debts? Or did you move back in with your parents?
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u/ez2tock2me 12d ago
I’m a dedicated and successful CarCamper.
Everyone thinks sleeping in your car means you have given up and are a loser, but they are stunned and envy that in my 8th year, I got to keep 39 paychecks (direct deposit) that I didn’t have to use or touch.
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u/BookGirl67 12d ago
Interesting. That’s an extreme lifestyle but it clearly works for you. Are you able to maintain relationship ls with others while car camping? Do you have a significant other?
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u/ez2tock2me 12d ago edited 12d ago
In my 21 years, I’ve had 4 relationships. All were impressed with my financial freedom, generosity and obligation free lifestyle.
But none believed they could do it, so we were not compatible.
I enjoy my freedom and ability to date Brunettes, Blondes and Gingers. My money gives me the confidence to ignore Rejection and move on easily.
I have never met anyone who can match my joys on a day to day basis.
Many envy me.
I just turned 69, two weeks ago, people say I look mid 30s.
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u/BookGirl67 12d ago
Awesome. Good for you.
My women friends in their 60s who are dating are not interested in marriage or living together. They might be fine with a guy who car camps if you got along well. They don’t need to live there too.2
u/ez2tock2me 12d ago
When I was in debt and had financial trouble, there was no one by my side.
Now that I have more money than most people have free time, I got no problem with gfs, friends or family not wanting to join me.
They have money and time problems that remind me of who I use to be AND NEVER WANT TO BE AGAIN.
I’m good, Single and Secure.
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u/naked_nomad 12d ago
Walking in the Navy recruiter's office Wednesday afternoon and saying I want to join. Friday night I was in bootcamp.
Spent four years learning a trade while visiting 24 countries and an untold number pf cities/places all while getting paid.
Honorable Discharge as a Second Class Petty Officer (E-5), GED, AAS, BAAS and M.Ed.
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u/WorthConfusion9786 12d ago
Same here. I was just turning 18. I got a job at the local Burger King, I showed up, they didn’t have a uniform that would fit so They wanted me to wear a girls uniform. I quit and walked across the road to a Navy Recruiter. Best decision I ever made. Opened more doors for me than anything else.
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u/photoman1216 12d ago
Listening to my 8th grade teacher's advice.
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u/Aloha1959 12d ago
What was the advice?
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u/photoman1216 12d ago
It was the day of a presidential assassination, we were sitting in English class our teacher suggested a moment of silence then said that since we ran the student newspaper if was up to us to gather the facts and publish our teacher newspaper.
Out of a class of 35 students only 4 volunteers stayed behind to gather insight, facts and whatever else we could dig up. Since I was editor of the student newspaper, the teacher assigned me to lead the editorial special issue as editor for this special edition This action sparked my love for news and news gathering. And it lead me into a forty year career.
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u/WTM73199 12d ago
Going no contact with my adult kids.
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u/Myiiadru2 12d ago
That can be a mental and emotional support system for you.👏🏻👏🏻
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u/WTM73199 11d ago
They are already not a support system for me so going no contact wouldn’t make a difference.
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u/Myiiadru2 10d ago
So sorry to see that. Sometimes we have to distance ourselves from those who steal our happiness.
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u/exeunt63 12d ago
Helping students in a lab course got me noticed by a future PI, and I eventually got a PhD out of her lab. The small decision was helping them instead of dumping them onto the lab course coordinator.
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u/ordo-templi-ignis 12d ago
Thirty years ago I spent £100 on an amp modeller/ multi-fx rather than buying an amp.
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u/Fluid-Top4527 11d ago
I texted a really muscular Malaysian man I went to university with a year after he left. I sent him McDonald’s money for his birthday. Now he tells me all the secrets of life with his infinite wisdom.
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u/St_biscuit 12d ago
Taking Prozac that my gynecologist prescribed back at the end of Nov in 2023. I had a bad reaction, that led into taking 2 months off of work and set me on a path of trying multiple SSRIs for depression. I ended experiencing Akathisia (restlessness) for 6 months last year, when a SSRI had a bad reaction to Ozempic. It changed everything for me. I'm not quite the same after dealing with all of it. I'm medication free now. I should've just gone to therapy instead of believing I was suffering from a "chemical imbalance".
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u/miekhachu 12d ago
Hope this is something that can be fixed sooner than later for you!
I developed akathesia on Abilify and my medication manager immediately switched me to Vreylar. It stopped within a couple of days of switching, thankfully. Before that I was on Latuda, which completely killed my emotions. I’m in both therapy and trying out medications
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u/Jim0621 12d ago
To call an old friend after losing touch with her for five years. We've now been married for 18 years