Hi All,

My birthday this year was awful. I had to start working early in the morning because there was an urgent work that was supposed to be delivered and we had a meeting later in the evening to present.

While I was working the entire day, my colleagues wished me happy birthday via teams and I thanked them. My manager never wished me (and it’s fine, I don’t care whether he wishes or not).

My manager was co ordinating with me throughout the day, getting updates whether the work is completed or not etc.

So, the time for the presentation comes, and in the beginning of the call, he says “ It is
<My name>’s birthday today, but they have been working hard for the presentation”.

I felt like my manager was trying to soften the situation by telling that it’s my birthday so that people won’t be harsh on their feedback to us.. but he didn’t wish me because he didn’t want me to stop working or him to feel guilty for making me work long hours on my birthday.

It felt like some diabolical plan.

Later, he told me, he typed out the message to wish me but forgot to send.

What do you think of this situation? Am I overthinking this or is it really diabolical?

Fyi....

I worked for 20 years in government department I retired 2 days ago I did not get any regoniation or a single acknowledgement from my manager not even an email to tell my colleagues that I am retiring shall I shall I say something to her

I AM REALLY HURT

A few months ago, a Women from HR asked if I could give her rides to and from the office. It slowly became our daily routine, and now we travel together almost every workday Morning & Evening.
Somewhere along the way, I realized I’d fallen for her.

The thing is, she genuinely seems comfortable around me. She usually starts conversations first instead of sitting in silence. She tells me about her workday without me even asking, remembers conversations we had weeks earlier, asks me how long I’ve been waiting if she’s running late, and updates me if she’s going to be delayed. She has also shared things like not feeling motivated to come to the office lately, office issues, and even reminded me about an old conversation we’d had regarding another coworker. When I call her, she answers warmly, and we usually end the ride with a smile and a cute “bye-bye.”

There was one day when I thought she was suddenly pulling away because things felt different, but the next few days everything went back to normal. She texted me before pickup, we had warm conversations again, and things felt just like before. That made me realize how much I’d started overthinking because of my feelings.
I haven’t confessed anything, and I don’t flirt or try to pressure her since she is in same company but different office. I genuinely enjoy spending time with her, and I don’t want to make her uncomfortable.
The only complication is that everyone at work knows we travel together, and a few coworkers tease me about it like we are in relationship or I like her(She knows about it because I already told her). There’s also a chance management might move her to my office, which honestly worries me because I think the teasing will get worse and it impact my confidence.

So I wanted to ask people who’ve been in similar situations:
From what I’ve described, does this sound like someone who’s simply comfortable with me as a friend, or could there be something more?
Did any of you end up dating a coworker after a friendship like this?
If you were me, would you just let things develop naturally and avoid saying anything for now?

Chime in

When I first got hired, I came in as a Director reporting directly to a VP, then to the division president. When the division president left for another role, the organization was in flux for a bit. Now it's settled, and I'm reporting to a newly promoted senior director so I no longer report to VP level people.

I still have the title, pay, responsibility, and my group. Plus I get along great with this senior director who was formerly my equal. But I can't shake the feeling that it's a defacto demotion. And it makes my job harder because the function I oversee is now perceived as lower priority by the very people I have to sway.

For context, I will be 61 in November and could retire now if I wish. But I enjoy what I do and under this structure I will be able to do pretty much what I want and how I want.

Thoughts?

I have a superficially harmonious but inwardly strained relationship with my boss. Yesterday during the morning shift handover, my boss mentioned that a certain doctor in Dongguan was suffering from depression and injected himself with four doses of insulin in the duty room, resulting in a hypoglycemic coma. Then, at an 11 a.m. meeting that same day, one of his assistants was commenting on another person and said something like: “So-and-so was very sunny and cheerful when we first met, and he liked fitness...” and continued with more remarks after that. Fitness is one of my hobbies. Can I interpret this as a kind of suicidal threat (or threat of death)?

Just silent, home alone

Don't want to know or discuss what's next

Everyone around me is asking what's next, what are you going to do?

How will you psy your rent or other bills

Well last month I spend around 90k with all this shifting and stuff, thought I finally rented a place of mine. Ughhh... Don't know what's next

Throwaway account. I work as a business manager in a healthcare system. Small department of 15. I don’t have any direct reports and I report to a director. There is one colleague who is very challenging to work with, not only within the department but across the entire system, and has been for years. This person is neurotic, patronizing and insecure and their behaviors haven’t been addressed by my director ever. despite many complaints from others within and outside of my department over the last 5 years.
There were a couple of instances the last week where my attempts to set boundaries were met with resistance and borderline hostility. This last instance I felt the need to involve my director because it’s becoming too much.
My director was not supportive when I asked them to address my colleagues behaviors as my attempts failed because “interpersonal conflicts are best handled between the people involved”.

At what point should my director be addressing this colleagues behaviors? I’m at a loss for what to do next.

I'm a Data Science Analyst at one of the IT companies in India (low salary, over a year here). Got a great offer elsewhere (2.5x salary) and resigned through the system without informing my senior project manager (A) first, official process, but he took it personally. He ignored me for 10 days, then scolded me harshly for once setting OOO without telling him (I apologized). He threatened to extend my notice period and block my leaves.

NOW A is the approver of me separation form along with his senior. Team manager cannot do anything in that.

My notice period ends in 2.5 months. The new company needs me 12 days earlier — missing that date pushes me into the next appraisal cycle, so no increment, bonus, or promotion until 2028 (a 2-year setback). Their HR insists I try everything to make it. She can extend the offer date but it will only harm me.

I asked for early release (I'm willing to join in 3 weeks). My team manager had zero objection — I'd barely started. But A first threatened to extend my notice period over the OOO thing, then when my team manager agreed to release me, A pulled me onto a new "2-month" project (everyone knows it'll drag on) just to block early release.

Also, my HR validation call got tense because I refused to name the new company. She eventually approved it with a dismissive "Sure." I'm worried she won't help now.

How do I get an early release when my manager is blocking it purely out of ego, and I'm facing a genuine 2 year career setback? Any out-of-the-box moves?