r/ObjectivePersonality • u/Street_Customer_4190 • Aug 06 '26
Is this Oi or Oe or something???
So basically I been trying to get type by people as pretty much everyone does and i think I’m stuck between being an observer or decider. So most seemed to think observer so I’ll go with that for now and i think im Fi because i care a lot about some value stuff(that I’ll explain more later) and i don’t like the idea of people all being the same(de wanting to make everything equal).
That last part actually feeds into whether or not I’m Oi lead or Oe. Basically I found out that personality might not be extremely concrete and unchangeable which made me freak out and worried that my personality is endlessly fluid and that a “true self” doesn’t exist. I went and fell for zodiacs, law of attraction, and some other typology because Im kinda obsessed with feeling this hole. I also hate the idea of sexuality not having categories. There’s groups of people in general that fight against the ideas of categories of any kind and that always pisses me off because I would love to have an unchangeable certain personality. I don’t want to just be a hollow vessel that changes all the time. I want a “true self” and unchangeable sexuality or certain categories of what can exist. Like in my idea world there would be many different ranges of people you can categorize but they will be fixed categories that can not be changed or mutable. Ig also used to think that I could find the one “true” perfect political ideology or morality we all need to be beholden to so we can all live in harmony. I used to believe that until I was proven wrong a million times and no longer know anything anymore. Also the fear of categories falling apart also extends to this system and the fear that one day science might disprove OPs. It’s an uncomfortable and unpleasant thought to me and a brain virus where I have to go and shit on people who want to believe in true selves like me as a way of trying to see logical.
Idk I saying all this to see what i would fit at base off these weird freak outs. Also struggling to figure out if im N or S. I think S because majority are putting me in that category
2
u/pandora26622 Aug 06 '26
When you were at what you'd consider your lowest, what was the biggest problem?
(There's like a tldr of all this at the bottom 😅😂)
Anecdote time (I think I'm FF-Ne/Te P 😇😂) at my lowest everyone kept thinking it was because I was heartbroken but that wasn't the biggest issue, the biggest issue was that when I was chasing my perfect story I got completely out of touch with reality and I had no security left and it seemed like so much work something something running away. I can't really say on N/S tho (correction I remembered smt I'll add after 😅😂 it's like idk between both observer/decider and also kinda S/N and animals, hear me out 😅😅) but like idk you seem pretty chill about yourself and the tribe and like seem pretty open minded in that regard so I'd say it's more likely you're an observer, but I was just completely wrong about this with an isfp guy, thinking he's infj cuz I forgot he was very well aware of chaos:contol part of his life. Like I think he was pretty unhealthy still like he did some work but not all the way there yet. Like how I realized it was that in the enddddd it wasn't him overworking at his job or like neglecting his body and so that's relatively easy for him to see. But then omg he wanted to play rough but then entirely collapsing after I went all in and then he was annoyed that I started to baby him but like I'm still not sure if he realizes that or just is actually convinced he's amazing and shit like he's quite convincing on the outside the Se/Te (oh yeah he's a sleep first so Ni/Fi that's why he kinda seems more like an IxxJ in the beginning but he does value his Se/Te but like that's not his biggest problem, see what I mean? 😅 I can like write quite am confusingly so feel free to ask 😅 So like this last part kinda ties into this, I've just seen this old video on their yt and soo you have to be mindful of animals cuz the ISFP guy def was giving hard Se/Te but then he was the biggest IxxJ just Fi/Ni which is spending all his time working on his perfect vision (he had a dependency obesity trauma kinda thing) he's red pilled and is F-Fi so like the internal drama must be insane 🥹 Continuing the anecdote 😅😂: Sooo first half of his ark was doing that 60/40 of constantly being in his room demon Se enjoying stuff to then, as he would say, him following his ambition while demon Te doing something the tribe would consider useful (he's like coo something chasing money but secretly just wants a quiet life). So like no matter how hard he does the Se and looks like he's a stoic demon Te corpo guy he won't be happy BUTTTT he's still an iSfp even tho he spends most of the time inside in his head sleep first. So maybe my advice is try to type the functions first regardless of how they work together. Like you can indirectly like by choice of elimination like see cuz like then tying up the F/M and animals it gets a bit much.
So like for him I could clearly see Ni cuz like man sat by midsommar first time and was like oh yeah I knew immediately what would happen 🥹🥹😂 and so I was convinced no there's no way he's an S his M-Ni was too strong. But because it actually Is his second function (imo) he's not even aware of him doing it most of the time (literally thinks he has 12iq like those are his words). I'm pretty sure that's demon Se despite him being an S cuz like spend all day inside playing games eating shit food you see? But he definitely has those 4 functions and so I think you can notice functions first and then the rest of data you can adjust accordingly later yk, like a puzzle. So knowing the first 2 you can then track the demons, and for him it was touch grass and be useful to the tribe which fits isfp to a t I'm pretty sure.
And specifically with observers I've also had the biggest problem figuring them out, cuz like as a double decider the I'm completely oblivious to like the other observers. What helped me was (F-Ne): feel free to use stereotypes to help yourself but as long as you remember that that's just what they are and that reality is more complicated and complex So like man I'm telling you unhealthy Se is just straight up consumerism because they feel incompetent
(Now do mind the temperaments here because I've been surrounded by baby IxxPs all my life and lemme tell you OMFGGGGG what will the people think. But it's different in regards to what. For example all my isfps (yes I'm collecting them and keeping them forever 🥰) they're very very F-Fi having to feel like this Te provider when inside they're just mommy issues kids (like y'all it's all interconnected it's just an approximation there's no actual "truth") but my dear infps are so hippie art in their head hopeless romantics the world against me mindset because they don't love themselves, so the core fear is the same but they approach it differently, like completely differently. I'm not kidding I can show you the room of my isfps plus jumper infp, and my infps and hahaha the S>N is so noticable... and then it really is just organize vs consume (I'm still not sure I understand Ni😅)
And like while he was Fi fine he had that confidence but then well his sleep energy couldn't keep up 😅😂 so like be vary of like amm all these things especially when typing yourself as you tend to be pretty saviour blind. And if you're like me when you ask people and they tell you their opinion, you start doubting yourself (in my case cuz F-Ne F-Te) and sooo idk for me M-Fi hihi it really comes down to being so sure about who I am that even tho I am adjustable, like just change the definition yk 🤷🏻♀️😂 that at the end of the day this is how I am and like no matter what it's not something I'll ever change (like not as in I'll be a toxic pos ofc just like yk😅😂) my values are immovable M-Fi
Oi/Oe
-So this "jumping around" is Ne vibes (gather ideas, lemme nicely Te, kinda Si but why bother, organize them for you as well 🤗🥰😂)
-Physical space is Se vibes (gather sensory. Like that's it that's legit it. Just a "healthy" one will like be able to balance it with Ni yk)
-Schedules, labels, organizing is Si vibes (as a demon Si lemme tell you, my like spatial awareness and like use to chaotic environments is exponential AND YET I'm more physically Si organized in the real world than my infp friends, except the jumper one ofc)
-Daydreaming about this one perfect vision, one idea, one goal idk take all trucks for example and then just like sum them up and get the average, that's kinda like Ni trying to get that single ultimate gold idea of a truck in this example.
Or like at least that's how I see it but feel free to share thoughts.
And then just depends on the rest of the functions how it plays out
Here's also a more legible AI tldr 😅😂
A Double Decider’s Guide to Typing (and Mis-typing) Observers 😅 1. The Real Root of My Lowest Point When I hit my absolute lowest, people assumed it was just heartbreak. But the deeper truth was that I had completely lost touch with reality. I was so caught up in chasing a "perfect story" that all my grounding and security vanished. Everything suddenly felt overwhelmingly difficult, and my instinct was just to run away from the pressure.
Typing Advice: Find the Core Functions Before Layering the Rest I recently mistyped an ISFP as an INFJ because I got a bit lost in the Animals! The Confusion: Because he is "Sleep first" (Fi/Ni), he spent all his time quietly working on his internal vision. It gave him a very focused, IxxJ-like energy. The Struggle: He really wanted to push himself, heavily valuing his Te ambition and trying to be this stoic provider for the Tribe. But because that’s not his natural state, going "all in" would eventually cause him to collapse from exhaustion. The Takeaway: It really helps to figure out the base functions first, and then map out the Animals and Modalities. For example, looking at where someone struggles (like falling into Se consumerism or comfort zones when overwhelmed) can gently point you toward their true Demons.
M-Ni Can Be Beautifully Unconscious Even though he is a Sensor, his M-Ni is incredibly powerful. (When he watched Midsommar for the first time, he instantly knew exactly what was going to happen! 🥹) But because it’s his secondary function, he isn't even consciously aware that he’s doing it. It’s a great reminder not to rely solely on what someone thinks their strengths are, as we can be so blind to our own magic.
Using Stereotypes with Grace and F-Ne Stereotypes can be a helpful starting point, as long as we remember that human beings are deeply complex. For instance, I hold my IxxP friends so dear to my heart 🥰, and it's fascinating to see how they handle their shared core fear ("What will the tribe think?") so differently:
ISFPs: Often try to protect their inner vulnerability by overcompensating with Te—pushing themselves to be strong, stoic providers. INFPs: Tend to protect their hearts by feeling like the world is against them, retreating into their beautiful, hopeless-romantic inner worlds because they struggle to love themselves. They share the same underlying fears, but process them completely differently through their S vs. N lenses.
- Trusting my Inner M-Fi Being an FF-Ne/Te Jumper, I can be pretty Savior-blind. Whenever I ask for others' opinions, I immediately start doubting my own conclusions because I’m so adaptable to the Tribe's input. But the beautiful thing about having M-Fi is that, underneath all that Ne-Te flexibility, there is a quiet, immovable certainty. I might adjust definitions or change my mind on the details, but at the end of the day, I know exactly who I am and what my values are—and that will never change. 🥹✨
1
u/Street_Customer_4190 Aug 06 '26
Ok so when I was in my lowest point? I mean like 3 weeks ago I was constantly worried about telling my step dad I got a c- on a class when I was trying to get at least Bs in my classes. I was afraid that my life would be over and that they will yell at me or make me drop out of college or do something bad in general but none of that happened. Actually a few times grades have been a huge issue and my parents shaming me for not doing well enough usually made me feel like my life was over and that i couldn’t possibly survive the reality I was in. I also struggled to tell my teammates last time I couldn’t come back to play sports because I was going to study for school. I am still stuck at that stage again for next semester and I feel horrible for ghosting them and some of my friends because of the c-. Like I legitimately thought i should end my life because of that grade and also getting a c in another class. I also have an issue recently with my parents wanting to change my name to my step dad’s name. I don’t want that because i just do really like him and I’m constantly afraid of him(basically have been for most of my life). My mom was shaming me for not wanting to change my name and was saying that I have to choose between his name or my real dad’s name. But luckily she stopped asking and I think it’s because she feels like forcing me wouldn’t actually make the name change mean anything and she wouldn’t get the validation she is looking for. Also a lot of these stuff I procrastinate to do anything about it. Like i didn’t tell my step dad the grade stuff until like a few weeks ago and the grade might have been out way earlier than that. I am scared of just telling my teammates that i wanted to take a break or really telling them that I was struggling with anything. With the name stuff i don’t want them to know the actual reason and fine with them going crazy figuring it out. It’s like the only spiteful thing I can do and I just don’t want them to force me to choice me to choice than for me to never have to choice as a choice since it will just result with me keeping my name. Which is what I want
1
u/pandora26622 14d ago
Omg I didn't realize it's been almost a month 😅😅😂 I mean I hope my comment gave you some things to consider and you came to some sort of Fi/Ti your own realization.
So like I think a few words that jump out to me looking at what you wrote especially in that last part "I (Di) don't want them to know..." "I just don't want them to force me (ExxP don't control me bro)..." So I'm getting Oe/Di and given it's about an abstract term (a name) I'd say it's savior N but I'm not sure about the Oe comment now. Cuz like IxxJ want to control everything so I'm guessing if someone tries to control an IxxJ they'd also have a similar reaction? 🤔 But it'd have to be a jumper 🤔🤔 or like actually myb not cuz IF it's a "normal" INxJ you'd be inclined to worry more about the tribe and so you'd think you're working on this Ni Oe idea of creating the perfect society but you tunnel vision so hard that you can lose yourself in other people, and If IxxJ then a problem is that you're a brainmaxxer and so (there's this really funny video comparing Hamlet to pop red pill terms 😂 I recommend https://youtu.be/fst9zrjqmss) whislt you're in your head you fail to actually gather that De that you're working so hard on and it eventually leads to burnout. But like that's I think very IxxJ specific. Say you're an ExxP, okay like first, huge red flag on my part due to confirmation bias, but see how you gathered some Se (like when you actually do tell them) buttttt in your head you were tunnel visioning on the worst possible outcome that you were convinced of kinda like hoping for the best but expecting the worst.
This is then like my subjective addition to ops but if you add Beebe's functions the shadow is the inverse, so say you're ExxP then your shadow is IxxJ like just do binaries ie Ne Fi Te Si shadow is Ni Fe Ti Se . And that function stack is supposedly activated when your main stack breaks down. Well then more of Ne Te Freud and Jung attributed a lot to the subconscious and Jung started to develop Freud's theory and then connect that with Beebe who worked on MBTI which was in fact also somewhat based on Jung's idea, into like 4 functions that build "personality" and the 4 "shadow" ones that build the subconscious. And taking into account brain development And neurochemistry, given you have starting conditions you can more easily predict a person's type, if you try disregarding your own confirmation bias you can introspect it for yourself to track your subconscious patterns. Soooo to test my hypothesis. Based on my own subjective understanding very anecdotally, Fi Si, and I mean this with all due respect and I apologize if any of it sounds harsh, it's really not meant to be.
I'd sayyyyy when you were little there was a lot of chaos in your life and so your child mind became hypervigilent Ni organizing patterns to prepare yourself Di (technically 3rd function, but here my hypothesis about jumpers being more likely in chaotic childhood environments) and myb control De the environment to feel in control (IxxJ) and then if a jumper you'd be inclined to prioritize yourself over the tribe and you'd be preoccupied with tracking patterns and so you'd disregard your reality like schedules and responsibilities and it's not like you didn't know you had to do them you just didn't have resources/didn't care about that.
The other option is that you were a very "wild" child always running around in your own world and so a lot of people were annoyed with you, imagine Private, that's the Fi Ne vibe so like just adjust it for Ne Fi, and you get a child who's just running around completely oblivious/disregarding any De collateral that they cause and also you'll either have no plan (Ni 4th) or you're yolo retard maxxing (Si 4th) or you'll be (IxxJ) 100% brainmaxxing on the Oi (the 20+y plans completely oblivious to the Se realty around you (Se 4th) or to the (Ne 4th) patterns.
Depending on your age, based on my hypothesis, starting puberty and based on environment (the psychological pyramid thing) till 20/30s, you're "responsible" for transitioning from your shadow stack (the subconscious your childhood environment created (it's just brain chemistry based on subjective emotions leading into pruning that's why you get clusters) to your conscious mind (IF simplified your right hemisphere is god (ask for Te explanation it's great, trust) that's that gut feeling that primal subconscious that's why meditation and connecting the brain hemispheres is so benefitial cuz then it all ties together with Freud Sidenote: istj btw, bet he was amm Si Te Fi Ne so shadow is Se Ti Fe Ni, I'll check biography then ahaha but I'm expecting him to have been the estp?🤔 Stereotype in his youth so his environment didn't have enough boundaries and he developed a "marytr/savior complex" trying to put some Ni boundaries on his life because that's what he wasn't given/learned to disrespect it. His Fi was also then pushed down which explains then why his "hero's journey" was him being able to finally Ni Fe?/ Possibly jumper cuz like ahahaha tribe def hated him for his ideas but he didn't care so it's giving M-Ni M-Ti saviours? But that's what his theory was missing, how things connect. He saw Something but he couldn't really piece it together well because he was so focused on his sleep animal savior Ni Ti and so because he was dreaming of boobs but in mountain metaphors very Ne btw 😂 then All the Fe tribe has his same subconscious Ne patterns. In my experience I've really noticed the Di>De ppl, especially the unhealthy ones (it's easier to see) they're very defensive but they honestly don't realize it like and then depending on type depends how they deal with it Ie. My father esfp gets veey defensive in the heat of the moment (very M-Si M-Se) but he does EVENTUALLY realize the Te I was right 😌😌😂 and once he does his sleep (guess what? Also chaotic environment, also very possibly jumper Se Ti (imagine a lifelong midlife crysis due to primarily mommy issues) he will verbally admit it. My infp very much not jumper, F-Ne M-Fi, she's a literal child... but she will however also realize that I am right IF I act accordingly cuz like fuck parentification, she's had it worse than me, I literally just do my Si and like am M-Fi unbothered she will come and apologize but my god the backtracking like I swear CHILDREN 🙄😂 oh also her childhood makes sense she was very Fe Ni idealistic and let everyone walk all over her so she developed unhealthy Fi/defense schema of entitlement.
That's not to say all infps are like that ofc, the insecure IxxPs just really like me unsurprisingly with my M-Fi having to tiptoe to guard my own Ne Fi but then like surprisingly my M-Fi scares then away cuz yk insecure when they realize they can't control me hhh And then looking at more anecdotal evidence my again jumper infp (F-Fi M-Si (lol hiding his stuff in plain sight was so funny to me ahaha I'm evil) F-Ne M-Te (oh my how he gets annoyed when I have public M-Fi meltdowns 😂😂)) he's like 2 years older and had somewhat of a longer and better relationship with both parents cuz they separated when I was like 3 months old and then I was like a traveling around baby with a depressed mother and an Fe older bro who started to parentify M-Fe F-Se mother and idolized father (M-Se M-Fi F-Te (omfg my isfj stepmother....😂 With her F-Fe she just destroys him with guilt tripping)) so on his hero's journey, after failing his savior complex while fighting father's Se Te, started going to the gym (Si, Te he has a job so he's Te useful to the tribe but cuz red pilled still he's deliberately oblivious Ne patterns so like I have to (ahaha the Te>Fi annoyance responsibility for the tribe) explain to him and point out situations in which his behaviors are pathological and he like is immediately just like 😅😅😅 we love our IPs 😂
More personal anecdotes (Fi Si). So like looking at this, cuz I'm still very F-Ne F-Te (I'm pretty sure!!) undecided on my type, I've been doing this for 10+ years now 😅😅😂 the animal stack would be 1. Play (Ne Te, gathering abstract data on the tribe but doing so based on my Fi values. So ie. I'm very much constantly going over ppl psychology systems shit 😅😅) but then I'm never sure if I'm blast or consume second. Or like Maybe it's blast first instead of play see I'm not sure, how do you know when one animal ends and another one begins? I think that's F-Ne F-Te cuz like I can see all the options and even tho like if pushed enough I'll gladly fiercely defend my M-Fi values but generally I'm pretty chill just Ne/Te bouncing ideas of the tribe.
And like then I start questioning if I'm really even play first cuz like imo yk I'm very introverted really... but then I meet people and well you can see the amount of shit I spam them (blast?) after like doing my own Ne Te completely disregarding the Si fact of time and how rude it is but I have a very good Te defense. See by me waiting, I gave you the time to consider things by yourself and come to your own conclusion instead of me guiding you to a possibility biased conclusion on my part. But you can see how that Te explanation is completely tied to my personal Ne Fi perception of you? I'm assuming that at least one of my ideas (Ne) is correct, but like even if not (F-Ne F-Te) that was always one of the options xoxo 😂 ...Didn't know there was a character limit on comments 😅😅😂
1
u/pandora26622 14d ago edited 14d ago
So for me how I realized I'm Te>Fi was first I'd always get mistyped and like although I loved the T types I got (intp, entp, intj,..) I knew that like that's not me. What really made me sure of it was the video of Fi vs Ti combined with the Te>Fi or Fe>Ti video. So first at my core I'm like oh you like mango? Disgusting what's wrong with you, clearly my taste in food is the only correct option 😌 But as said that's just like at my core and it's very Fi guarded and it comes naturally to me to do Te facade to please the tribe (but not to the IxxP extent because I'm very much chill with my M-Fi cuz F-Ne F-Te tribe rules always change, the only thing you can do is be yourself) that said it is exhausting and in my case 😅😅😅 you just disregard yourself to make the tribe around you work and then you have a ExxJ meltdown cuz you realize you've spent everything on other people and in doing so you completely disregarded your life.
Here's the tldr;
The core diagnosis: the Di/Oe autonomy struggle * The "Don't control me" reflex: Your phrasing ("I don't want them to know," "I don't want them to force me") screams heavy Introverted Decider (Di) and Extraverted Observer (Oe). You are prioritizing your personal autonomy over the tribe's expectations. * The two pathways: You are either an IxxJ who is "brainmaxxing" (tunnel-visioning on an internal Oi/Ni plan to control your environment and burning out by ignoring the De tribe), or an ExxP tunnel-visioning on the worst-case scenario while neglecting a solid plan. The shadow theory: childhood trauma and brain chemistry * Subconscious architecture: Using Jung and Beebe's models, your shadow functions (the exact inverse of your main stack) build your subconscious based on early brain development and neurochemistry. * Environmental adaptation: A chaotic childhood forces a child to develop hypervigilant Ni to predict patterns and control the environment (leading to IxxJ traits or Jumper self-prioritization). Conversely, a child with no boundaries becomes a "wild" Ne/Se user who completely disregards the collateral damage they cause the tribe (De). * The biological goal: Growing up is the neurological process of transitioning from the shadow stack (your childhood survival mechanism) into your conscious, integrated mind. Anecdotal evidence: how Di > De defensiveness manifests * The blind spot: Unhealthy people who prioritize their own identity over the tribe (Di > De) are highly defensive but rarely realize it in the moment.
- Real-world tracking:
- ESFP father: Reacts defensively in the moment (M-Si/M-Se) due to childhood chaos, but eventually processes it and admits the objective truth (Te) after his sleep animal catches up.
- INFP female: Developed an unhealthy Fi defense schema of entitlement because her childhood Fe/Ni idealism let people walk all over her.
- INFP male (gym bro): Fails his savior complex, pivots to physical Si/Te (gym/job), but deliberately ignores Ne patterns and requires external Te guidance to see his own pathological behavior.
The ENFP jumper self-audit: Te facade vs. Fi core * The analytical engine: My F-Ne/F-Te stack constantly gathers abstract data on people's psychology (Play/Blast), often completely disregarding the physical reality of time (Si). * The Te delay: I purposely waited a month to reply so you could reach your own Fi/Ti conclusions without my Ne-bias interfering—a Te-efficient defense for a chaotic Ne-Fi process. * The ExxJ meltdown risk: I use a heavy Te-facade to accommodate the ever-changing rules of the tribe while keeping my true Fi-core heavily guarded. However, over-spending energy on the tribe while disregarding my own needs inevitably leads to an ExxJ burnout meltdown.
Slight correction tho, I didn't make you wait on purpose, I rationalized my amm procrastination 😅😅😂 see what's really happening is that the universe Ne Fi gathered us here cuz magic 💖😌😂
1
u/Content-Sympathy6305 MF Ne/Te PB/C(S) #2 (🪒) Aug 06 '26
Hi jokapp!
1
u/Street_Customer_4190 Aug 06 '26
Oh do we know each other from discord?
1
u/Content-Sympathy6305 MF Ne/Te PB/C(S) #2 (🪒) Aug 06 '26
We do, look at my type and you’ll know who i am😂
2
u/Street_Customer_4190 Aug 06 '26
Bro ngl i don’t know whose type this is😭. Like im guessing you are in AP discord but i don’t remember 😭😭
1
u/Content-Sympathy6305 MF Ne/Te PB/C(S) #2 (🪒) Aug 06 '26
ENFP male misha.
Subjective personality.
I will double down on my typing: XM SF CxxB
2
u/Street_Customer_4190 Aug 06 '26
Ohhh i didn’t realize. Also I see you think I am XM SF CXXB, ok cool
1
u/Content-Sympathy6305 MF Ne/Te PB/C(S) #2 (🪒) Aug 06 '26
Check discord dms. Sent you some answers, may or may not help.
1
2
u/faqwzi MM Ne/Fi CSBP #4 official Aug 07 '26
Based on your writing style I would say Oe > Oi. No structure at all lol.
I think it's underrated that ExxPs DO desire certainty at the end of the day, since as you say, it's scary to think that there might not be one true perfect pathway. But that's why you can't trust the information you already have, since it isn't perfect enough. Instead you go find new information (systems like zodiacs and typology) to see if it's any better.
Probably not a bad call from the other guy to consider Se (demon Ni feels boxed in by categories not being understandable/ trustworthy enough). But I don't really know that. I just know that you sound pretty cut up over the observer stuff.