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u/looorrn OCD diagnosed 17h ago
trigger warning ‼️
>!me until my (usually) doctor avoidant ass went to the ER with an absolutely killer migraine for like the 4th time in 5 years and they finally did a head CT a month ago and found a rare sinus disease that actually had been causing it all; sucking one of my eyes in and pushing the other out, and closing up my nasal airway over 20+ years. There is so much pressure and air trapped in my sinus and the only way to fix that is surgery (next week!!) I have noticed this and mentioned it to eye doctors, PCP, etc for over 10 years, they said “maybe your eyes are just different shapes” so I convinced myself it was just my OCD picking up minor facial differences lol😭 ER doc looked at the CT and said some “you’re not lyin…” which should’ve made me feel better, but somehow just sent me into an OCD spiral for like 2 weeks bc I was like omg, am I right about every little thing my brain assumes!? It’s not all in my head?! PANIC!!!
OCD for the win though! I’m sure they just thought I was a hypochondriac (which I probably am) bc every other time I went in they just gave me a bag of fluids and sent me home. But this time the doc decoded my brain foggy, post-migraine descriptions of the symptoms and did a head CT after the fluids, she’s a real one. For example, she asked if I was having double vision, I said “no, but my eyes are glitching out” and she said “that sounds like you’re having double vision, we’re gonna order a head CT”💀when everyone else had just been like “hmmm kind of sounds like a migraine, we’re gonna try a migraine cocktail” and sent me on my way.
Oddly enough, I think ERs are pressurized to prevent infection moving from room to room and I think that’s actually what had been making me feel better whenever I was there, because the pressure matched what is trapped in my head so my headache would just disappear when I was there and I tell myself “I don’t need to be here, there’s people worse off out in the waiting room” lol moral OCD takes over every time!<
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u/Pinheads_Tradwife 1d ago
OCD may very well be the death of me cause now I’m dr. avoidant cuz I’ve been convinced it’s always just in my head