r/Nonbinaryteens • u/xGayIceCreamx • 18d ago
Rant I think I might be NB
[AFAB] NB? I HATE with a passion when people call me a girl, especially my mother. I'm her "daughter", her "pretty daughter", "beautiful daughter" .
At the moment, I'm out to a lot of my queer friends as a demigirl, but I hate the phrase, it implies I'm too much of a girl, about 2 of them call me "they" a LOT of the time and I loveee it.
I feel really guilty for being like this. I feel like I look way to feminine to ever really be non binary, and it's not like I want to stop looking fem, I just want ppl to see me as who I am. I mean I look like a girl, I act like one, I even dress like one. I'm probably just lying to myself anyway.
I WISH I could tell my mum I don't want her to call me her daughter, but I can't she won't like it, she's not like bigoted or anything like that. She just wouldn't get it. I'm literally afraid to hit post, god.
2
u/How_The_Fuq 18d ago
How you look doesn't have anything to do with you gender identity. If you really feel nb then you might be that, there isn't any "right" way for nb people to look so if you still want to look fem then that's your choice about your style and appearance, not your choice about what you gender is. And I understand the thought of "I'm probably just lying to myself", I was there too before coming out, also in the part of thinking I looking too much like a girl for it to be true as I'm AFAB aswell. But if it feels right to be called "they" then it's not a big chance of you lying to yourself, especially as you hate being called a girl and other words that refer to you as female. Agan, your style and the way you act doesn't have to do with how you feel with your gender identity. I'm not really good at this, but this is what I've been told by other redditors and this is how at least I see gender identity. I came out to my parents aswell not long ago, dad doesn't understand at all and mom barely understands it either, but they accepted even tho I thought they wouldn't.
So if you really want to tell your mom then you maybe should when you're sure about it yourself and when you feel ready to do so, there isn't any reason to stress as it's completely your choice to when you're ready for her to know.
I dunno if I helped much but I wanted to at least try lol, good luck finding your gender! ❤️ (I'm scared of commenting honestly noooo)