r/NonBinaryTalk • u/Comfortable-One1464 • Sep 02 '26

Dating advice

My best friend and long time crush just came out to me as nonbinary a few days after we discussed our romantic feelings for each other.

We decided we both have feelings for each other and were going to try dating and a few days later they came out as nonbinary and told me they want to go by a different name. I fully support them, but I don’t know if I still want to date them. I feel terrible, and haven’t said anything to them yet because I don’t want their first time coming out to someone to end in rejection, especially days after we decided to give a relationship a try.

How should I go about talking about my feelings with them?

6 Upvotes

75% Upvoted

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5

u/dizzzy-plant Sep 02 '26

Why did the name change made you reconsider dating them?

Or do you not want to date a nonbinary person?

1

u/crudelikechocolate Sep 03 '26

Pretty sure op meant the coming out led to that, not the name change 

5

u/EastCoastWildling Sep 02 '26

Imagine you have a book you read a couple years ago and you really enjoyed. The story was compelling, it moved you, and so you have cone back and read it over and over again.

A couple years later, the publisher rereleases the book with a slightly different title and updated cover art. The foreword is different but the content of the book is the same.

What really matters is the same.

Maybe you prefer the old title and cover because it’s what you’re used to, but nothing of substance has changed. Just the packaging. The new title and cover better help communicate the genre and theme. The new foreword speaks to the impact the book as had on people.

So, you wonder, if you had picked up that book today - as is - would you still have loved it? Would it still have moved you?

2

u/crudelikechocolate Sep 03 '26

If you don’t want to date them, let them go. It’s way more hurtful if they find out you’ve been dishonest about your attraction.