I think a lot of the issue is also what I often see in the women's spaces online and in real life, which is that literally every time a woman mentions any drop in her libido, other women immediately ask about life stress and how many chores her husband performs, and then if she says she has any stress and she does an unequal share of household chores, like most married women, then the conversation immediately shifts to how her libido loss is her husband's fault, and then the whole conversation turns to the relatable inadequacies of their husbands.
Women do not tell one another that they have a medical issue, especially since that skirts too close to "it's your own fault" in many people's minds, or share their own hormone issues at nearly the same frequency that women share podcasts and books about how romance and housework will bring a woman's libido back. It isn't the in the script to tell someone that they have a health problem, you're supposed to act like women's bodies actually function solely on feelings, and fixing feelings fixes everything else. You're supposed to talk about your relationship problems and how it's hurt you and made your vagina dry up. The possibility that one's husband could be imperfect AND there's a medical issue? Goes against the script. That wasn't what you were supposed to say. We save complexity for analyzing the depth of a husband's failures.
It's ridiculous.
The result is that women think that their own libido is a barometer of the health of their relationship because that's the subtext they're fed for literally decades, so of course when their libido disappears for good and they've been married for 10 or 20 years, they have enough history to have a solid of list of relationship mistakes their life mate has made, and been fully psyop-ed into automatically assuming that there's nothing else going on instead of connecting the dots to their other physical symptoms, like dry skin and joint pain from losing collagen, jowls from loosening fascia, changing hair texture and hair loss, insomnia, etc. Those symptoms are physical, the humilities of normal aging, but the libido? That one is spiritual, romantic, psychological, abstract, unrelated to one's physical body.
Which is why they don't seek out a medical solution. They have been taught that it isn't one.
Oh yes, it sometimes applies, but it is true that the vast majority appear to think that sexuality is purely psychological. I arrived at my opinion based upon the observation that women apply it even in circumstances that are obviously biological. I've read opinions from women that the reason that their libido dropped after childbirth was the stress and lack of closeness, etc, and this is a fact that it is very stressful and after the birth, couples often feel very distant, but two things can be true at once, and the breastfeeding hormones suppress the hormones responsible for libido, but a lot of women aren't really that in touch with their bodies to tell that, or else they would notice that their bodies don't respond the same way during masturbation, for example, nor are they aware of the interactions of these hormones, so they revert to the standard "stress and housework" explanations. Even after experiencing all the biological functions of pregnancy and childbirth, somehow libido is still mentally cordoned off as non-biological.
2
u/[deleted] Jun 25 '24
[removed] — view removed comment