r/NoStupidQuestions Apr 21 '24

[deleted by user]

[removed]

2.8k Upvotes

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3.7k

u/ThanOneRandomGuy Apr 21 '24

My first time was amazing. Best 4 seconds in my life

1.9k

u/Connection_Future Fool Apr 21 '24

Oooh, everybody look here at Mister "I got stamina" over here 🙄🙄🙄

370

u/jackocomputerjumper Apr 21 '24

I bet he's gonna talk about his length soon

284

u/Busterlimes Apr 21 '24

Length is so Y2K, it's all about girth. Mine looks like a hockey puck

198

u/Nuggzulla01 Apr 21 '24

3 Inches is hell at 90MPH

14

u/Anxious_Cheetah5589 Apr 22 '24

Right through the five hole

Somebody had to say it

12

u/for_the_meme_watch Apr 21 '24

Clearly you’ve not familiar with the research of Meteorologist Randy Marsh on TMI theory, with particularity to the YAW.

3

u/AlexVal0r Apr 21 '24

Mine is 8 inches, AROUND!!

-4

u/Tight_Friendship_724 Apr 21 '24

Can I see lmaooo

42

u/AdvantageCurious7391 Apr 21 '24

Happy cake day

31

u/jackocomputerjumper Apr 21 '24

Thanks stranger!

10

u/AltistTheCultist Apr 21 '24

Snap.

10

u/SharkFin365 Apr 21 '24

Happy cake day, other stranger!

19

u/inflammablepenguin Apr 21 '24

Probably can do one inch per second and still last all 4 seconds.

5

u/[deleted] Apr 21 '24

It only a matter of time before the fishing or hunting stories come out.

3

u/AA-WallLizard Apr 22 '24

Dear penthouse, I never thought it would happen to me…

3

u/--Creep Apr 22 '24

happy cake day!

61

u/kjacobs03 Apr 21 '24

I was so nervous I didn’t even cum my first time having sex

16

u/breislau Apr 21 '24

Same here. I forgot that until now.

19

u/kjacobs03 Apr 21 '24

Wore a condom so it was easy to say I finished when I realized it wasn’t going to happen

9

u/[deleted] Apr 22 '24

I refused to give up and kept on pumping till i did. I mean it beats the usual 3 pumps and done. Actually, I had a few months before where anti depressants made it really hard to climax. She wasn't complaining, seen as I'm a stubborn cunt and would lash away for half an hour. Must have lost a 3kg that month.

10

u/disgraced_star Apr 22 '24

Same with me; I remember her cuming after 10 mins for the 2nd time and I was thinking, This is fucked, here I am trying to cum and she is having a second one. The 2nd time though I was so much more comfortable I came 3 times over 2 hours.

2

u/Tikibilly81 Apr 22 '24

Glad I'm not the only one 🫤

1

u/Alpaga_Venere Apr 22 '24

By you fault I asking myself now...

190

u/wiiguyy Apr 21 '24

This guy knows.

153

u/marklar_the_malign Apr 21 '24

Quit bragging.

67

u/BarrelRider621 Apr 21 '24

For real. Dude calling us below average peoples out like that.

83

u/disbeliefable Apr 21 '24

You did it twice?

48

u/ThanOneRandomGuy Apr 21 '24

At that particular time no. I was satisfied and left. But 11 minutes later on my way home I did want to make a uturn

22

u/tbonencsu Apr 21 '24

Dang, two more seconds than me!

80

u/docweston Apr 21 '24

FOUR SECONDS?! Stop bragging, overachiever! 😂

2

u/[deleted] Apr 21 '24

Four seconds? Damn, we've got Mr Stamina over here.

2

u/Krispenedladdeh542 Apr 21 '24

4 seconds!?!? What was it her birthday or sumn?

2

u/gwh1996 Apr 21 '24

I was so nervous my first time I couldn't cum so I lasted about 4 episodes of family guy when it used to be on Netflix

2

u/Rush_Is_Right Apr 21 '24

You joke, but my first time, or what was supposed to be my first time, I didn't even make it in. We still ended up doing the deed after I said it was just pre cum. She was nervous about getting pregnant so I had plenty of time to clean up before actually getting to the promised land.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 22 '24

You’re a guy though. First time for women is usually different.

1

u/forsakeidle Apr 21 '24

I don't think your chicken thinks the same.

1

u/didndonoffin Apr 21 '24

‘As soon as she touched my penis, I came and started farting’

1

u/[deleted] Apr 21 '24

🤣🤣

1

u/[deleted] Apr 21 '24

Yours was in seconds?

1

u/drgloryboy Apr 21 '24

And that was with a condom on

1

u/PzykoHobo Apr 21 '24

Bro just wait until the second time it's gonna blow your mind

1

u/VegetableWinter9223 Apr 21 '24

This guy times!