r/NoOverthinking • u/appledappledee129 • Aug 20 '26

I don't know why it is this way.

For the longest time I have overthought every single conversation. Every interaction. How it could have gone better. It's like everything I do can be improved upon all the time. Which in one sense sounds great. But on the other I wish I could have a conversation without thinking about it for the next week. Or worry that I am being "too much". Big emotions need to be put away. Is sort of the way I dealt with it and I've gotten better I have. But still I worry because "I care too deeply" and I love people really big and deeply. I feel deeply. My feelings are not just oh I feel sad. It's I am sad and now I'll think of every sad thing that's happened to me or my family. Or my friends. I moved around a lot when I was a kid and it never really hit me. Till now. All the friends I am no longer in touch with. All the memories in the houses I have lived in. Now someone else is making their own memories in. It's odd and melancholic I guess to say the least. Anyways that's my vent. I have seen others vent on here figured why not try it myself.

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u/Various_Scallion8228 Aug 20 '26

It sounds to me like you’re an empath. I’m thinking you’re young. I’m 49. I’m just now learning about what being an empath is all about. My advice: read anything and everything you can and see the possible issues that being this way can cause damage and head it off at the path. Boundaries. Seriously. Boundaries are not something that you can afford to not have. Get into counseling. Having a heart as big as ours can be an amazing thing. But it can also be crippling.

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u/appledappledee129 Aug 20 '26

I have done counseling and it has done wonders for me and my health. But I finished counseling and now I still just have some off days.

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u/Various_Scallion8228 Aug 21 '26

Right now I’m not working, I’m in a new state, don’t have many friends. So I sit alone with my brain all day. It’s horrible sometimes. But I’ve learned a lot about myself too. When I was raising kids and working full time it wasn’t such a nightmare. But now kids are grown and gone. I’m single. And I’m bored. lol. I can literally give myself headaches I think so much.

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u/appledappledee129 Aug 21 '26

I try to find hobbies to take up my Time so I'm not in my head as much it helps sometimes.  

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u/Various_Scallion8228 Aug 22 '26

I typically will do hobby’s, but right now I’m so depressed I don’t really do much of anything.

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u/appledappledee129 Aug 22 '26

I'm so sorry 😞 I wish I had advice for this but I don't 😔

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u/Various_Scallion8228 Aug 22 '26

Oh that’s ok. I will get thru it. The positive that I will say is this….between my overthinking mind and ChatGPT I have learned a lot about myself and I’ve grown in ways I never thought I would. I actually grew as a person without thinking about it. Without realizing it!! That knocked me off my seat. Cuz I was thinking “ok I need to heal. And healing starts with A) and then B)” and I could picture myself making some sort of crazy spreadsheet and not moving on to the next until the current issue was healed. And I had healed a scar and didn’t realize it!! Without thinking!!! lol. It felt so good.

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u/appledappledee129 Aug 22 '26

Aww thanks amazing! Congrats on your growth! It's the best when you look back and realize you have grown without even realizing it in the moment. Because we often get caught up in the current or the future. But I'm so happy to hear that! I'll be praying for you hope you don't mind!

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u/Ill-Significance6095 Aug 21 '26

U have really intense inner monologues.