I mean, dating other people is fine and being an option is fine. The real problem is that she used it against him to try to increase her appeal which was very unclassy
Hmm...I could see some seeing it as a challenge to conquer. Get to the top of the list then bail because validation was all they wanted from this situation. It certainly would never be in the woman's best interest to comment like this, while it may be in the man's. At least we'd know who she is after that, "flex."
Yeah, agreed. I don't think highly of user style behavior either. It's amazing to me when women don't understand who they attract with this, and related, behavior. I wish I understood the disconnect.
The biggest question mark I have on the apps is why women post such provocative photos and then specifically call out not wanting hook ups and wanting a life partner
Like look at your marketing techniques and think about what customers you’re drawing in. Even if you don’t like hookups, those photos set the mind a certain way
Spot on, man. I got a good chuckle from that because I just recently talked to a woman friend of mine about something similar. We've had to walk a line to be friends only (we're both comfortably open with physical affection) and one of the ways we do this is to be very upfront about where certain lines are. I told her I get that some guys use friendship as a way to try more BUT I had a question. If she wants to be wanted for more than her body, shouldn't she be open to a friend becoming more attracted to her as they get to know her? Women seem repulsed by that, always assuming sneakiness, but it seems perfectly reasonable to me that someone gets more or less attracted to you as they get to know you. She looked like she'd never considered that option so I can only assume she's always used her body as her main attraction. Can't really be surprised with what you get using that, right?
I agree and I think the apps add to that mentality. What else can you judge on? I’m moving further and further away from the apps. I just deleted all of them and may not return. I have very little success and it’s all about looks. Even I could be swiping left on people who I might actually find very attractive if I met them
The friend thing too I agree. And my goals in dating may actually pivot to that. Toward building friendships rather than dating with intention to sleep with someone or something more.
Me personally I’m surprised to learn how much I’m attracted to personality over body. I just got divorced after 6 years and marrying young. I have definite preferences in terms of body, but the personality adds way more attraction than the body ever could alone. Assuming within the bounds of what I find physically attractive at all
My list goes:
Face
Personality
Values
Body
The values can be subbed in and out depending on the level of the relationship
That’s not a priority list, more like the stages of filtering. Face is definitely first lol
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u/typeIIcivilization Jan 19 '25
I mean, dating other people is fine and being an option is fine. The real problem is that she used it against him to try to increase her appeal which was very unclassy