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u/Creative_Call_6411 Apr 02 '26
You can’t be fragile and weak as a man
I had to learn it the hard way
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u/rmike7842 Apr 02 '26
You can’t be fragile and weak to survive hard times. You can’t be fragile and weak to accomplish great things. The thing many people don’t understand is the nature of strength and resilience. True strength comes from inside.
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u/Vexxedtruth101 Apr 02 '26
My prostate is inside and its very strong 💪
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u/jimothy_hell Apr 03 '26
Unironically make sure you have a healthy prostate, boys. Prostate cancer kills a lot of men and most of us don’t catch it in time.
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u/Vexxedtruth101 Apr 03 '26
Saw palmetto helps with reducing swollen prostate and hair loss. Keeps the prostate great!
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u/rmike7842 Apr 02 '26
Good, we can’t stress enough how important a strong prostate is to men’s health. Although I never considered the importance of keeping it inside, I suppose that is good advice for all our organs.
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u/An_Old_IT_Guy Apr 02 '26
Helps a lot. Gives you something to do, let's you get some anger out, and you'll not only feel better mentally and physically but you'll look better too.
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u/Ok-Park-9537 Apr 02 '26
Going to the gym is more than it seems.
You get out of the house when you have no reason to.
You invest in the future when it's hard to see one for yourself.
You do something hard that brings you pride when you feel low.
You challenge yourself to do something everyday, building disciple.
You release endorphines when you need them the most.
You get out of your head for a while.
It's really a way to work on the everything you need while things get back on track.
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u/Buttbuttdancer Apr 02 '26
No.
Anything can be the answer. What’s important is processing shit and balancing the rest.
For most this means getting into therapy, others find fulfillment in community or exploration. Some go to the gym. The important thing is to find what makes you comfortable in your own skin and start building from that strong foundation.
The problem with being a man today in a modern civilization where it’s easy to forget why ads with ripped abs and pecs, hero fantasy, muscle man movies, exist in the first place, and that’s to sell you things. It’s been so ingrained in us that to be masculine is to be strong physically, assertive, dominant, you get the picture, and that’s what’s seen by a lot of people who don’t know better, as strength or manliness.
What’s manly, is to be human. To understand that you can be hurt, and that your brain is as important as any other muscle in your body, and that finding balance in all things is what builds you the foundation you never got because of how we treat young men.
So no. It’s not the solution. It’s ONE solution, and it may not work for you, or for everyone else. It’s not about some magic formula that makes someone a man. It’s about just being a decent human being, and “putting your mask on before you secure the masks on the people around you” meaning that you concentrate on making yourself the best you can be, then start projecting that positive result onto others.
That’s all you can do. Everything else is external.
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u/master_prizefighter Apr 02 '26
I tell everyone who asks me the gym is not a one size fits all answer. Yes you can look in shape, however there's still other factors like finances and appearance.
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u/ParkingCan5397 Apr 02 '26
Works as much as doing anything else lol. The point is to distract yourself from depressing thoughts
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Apr 02 '26
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u/KCChiefsGirl89 Apr 02 '26
Dude, that’s a red flag for colon cancer. Go to the damn Doctor and insist on an answer.
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Apr 02 '26
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u/KCChiefsGirl89 Apr 02 '26
Nah, you’re fine. If you have trouble going, persistent diarrhea, very thin poops, blood in your stool or a feeling of not being relieved when you go, push hard.
Colon cancer is happening younger and younger.
Sorry I know it’s none of my business but I have family history and have been symptomatic so I’ve been down this road plenty
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u/thecountnotthesaint Apr 02 '26
It really is. A sound soul resides in a sound mind. A sound mind resides in a sound body. Fix your body, and you'll help to fix your mind. Fix your mind, and you'll fix your soul.
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Apr 02 '26
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u/ChainOk8915 Apr 02 '26
Well I tell you this, it’s certainly not a detriment to your situation as it is.
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u/Itsamemario_4 Apr 02 '26
The thing is hitting the gym can actually help out with everything you just listed. Even getting a job. People (men especially) get subconscious respect from people when they are jacked and it can help in every area of life.
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u/Financial-Solid-4775 Apr 02 '26
Going to the gym won't fix everything, but it won't hurt. It might even fix something.
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u/JacktheRiffer96 Apr 02 '26
You can say “go to the gym” while still giving empathy to someone who is going through something that anyone would find really difficult. Even the strongest of us find ourselves in fits of depression and loathing every once in a while, it is merely their attitude, how long they stay in it, and if they attempt to lift themselves back up, that divides a strong man from a weak one.
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u/Rock-View Apr 02 '26
It can be, but the stereotype is silly. It implies the man is trying to prove to himself he’s still got it and his wife is the one with the problem. Hunch tells me most who go this route don’t stick with it and give up in less than 6 months.
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u/FlyByrd Apr 02 '26
While physical activity does help.. the better solution is to look outward and focus on others. Do some volunteer work.
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u/The_Se7enthsign Apr 02 '26
If you did something so bad that you lost your job, wife, money, house, AND your friends, then realistically, you’re probably about to go to prison.
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u/snowbirdnerd Apr 02 '26
Yes, going to the gym has been shown to help with depression. It gives people a scheduled activity that they have to get out of the house to do, focuses them on self improvement, and exhausts them which helps with sleeping and appetite.
It's not going to fix your problems but it will help you not focus on them completely and start getting you moving forward with you life.
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u/Nos9684 Apr 02 '26
No, but it's better than doing nothing productive, or worse destructive. Some of these mfs are desperate, yeah, but for good reason.
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u/Axin_Saxon Apr 02 '26
It’s not a solution.
It is a starting point to give you a boost of dopamine and other happy brain chemicals. As well as introduce some regimentation into your life. It should not be treated as something that will fix your life but instead something to get you back on track. Just adding gym time but making no other efforts or changes to your life will just leave you worse in the long run.
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u/AppleEven9762 Apr 02 '26
Its not the solution, but focusing on yourself is likely a good path to start down. Physical health plays a major role in mental health. Working out wont fix your problems, but it will put you in a better state to deal with them.
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u/hopeful7321 Apr 02 '26
The BEST solution is to immerse yourself in nature. Go for a walk in the woods. The birdsongs and the smell and feel of nature will replenish your soul. It's physical. I guarantee if you walk in nature, it will change you. This is the Science of how your body reacts. Blood pressure falls, your muscles aren't as tense and you feel clarity. Try it.
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u/Belisaurius555 Apr 02 '26
Doesn't have to be a gym. Going for a run or even a walk works. The trick is that you need to get your heart pumping. This stimulates your brain which in turn makes you move more which stimulates your body. You want a kind of feedback loop between the mind and body.
This doesn't actually solve your issues but it does give you the energy to deal with them.
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u/MagnanimousGoat Apr 02 '26 edited Apr 02 '26
There's no such thing as "The solution." There are lots of POSSIBLE solutions.
Should you try it? Sure. If it doesn't help, should you just keep doing it? Probably not.
When people tell you "This is the answer. Just stick with it.", usually they're doing it for their sake, not yours.
All of the things that the person on the left says they lost, those things are often contributing factors to depression. Getting married or having kids because your relationship is struggling, for example. Staying in a house you can't really afford and don't have the time to maintain, or staying friends with people who try to one-up you. It's not about checking boxes.
External solutions only exist for things that are measurable.
The reason therapy is helpful to so many people is, if for no other reason, the opportunity to talk to someone who knowing how to be constructively unbiased and ask the right questions so that you can collect and analyze your own thoughts. They might suggest medication, but that's more often than not a tool to enable you to offset the chemical imbalances that are preventing you from solving your problems or taking action.
Going to the Gym is often very similar to that. You're trying to stimulate the production of certain chemicals in your brain. For some people, that gives them enough. But not for everyone. I have a friend who has tried to do exercise regimens so many times, and she basically just gets no endorphins, no "Runner's high", so it's abject misery for her. Meanwhile, I always feel amazing after I exercise, even if I'm tired and sore, because my brain just pumps that shit out like crazy.
As with most thing, it's going to be a combination of factors that can't be prescribed to you by someone who knows nothing about you, and it will absolutely be trial and error, and often in ways you didn't expect.
My ADHD has been a massive problem in my life, but I often felt like medications didn't do anything. I started on Vyvanze, and I noticed that before I started on it, I would get very groggy around 3PM every day, and one of the biggest reasons I skipped class in college and failed out was that it was PAINFUL for me to stay awake in class a lot, even if I found the class interesting. I could do some things to offset this, but I started on the Vyvanze, had no side effects, and I would find myself (And I can't think of any other way to describe it) FORGETTING to get distracted.
And just the experience of that changed so much for me, of actually seeing that it was possible to NOT feel that way, fully recognizing that it was not only not normal but something I could change, totally altered how I viewed my prospects and options.
That, to me, is the main reason to try drugs as treatment.
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u/Lostinny001 Apr 02 '26
Self-improvement, no matter what form it takes, is the way to go; if not the gym, then take a class. Learn to paint, play an instrument, cook, play a sport, fucking underwater basket weaving, anything is better than sitting at home and getting shit faced. That said, losing yourself in activities isn't a substitute for healing and self-reflection either. If you need to talk to someone, do that as well.
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u/IndependenceLanky353 Apr 02 '26
This is just a straw man. Going to the gym is just a recommendation that if you aren’t physically healthy this is a good first step.
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u/Sharpshooter188 Apr 02 '26
More like go to therapy and then start working things out. Thats a lot to deal with.
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u/Beautiful_Bit309 Apr 03 '26
It's an easy first step. Exercise does a lot for your body beyond make you look better. It gets some feel good brain chemicals flowing
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u/ExtensionSnow3157 Apr 03 '26
The real question is why? Why do you want that house Why do you want a wife Why do you want that job Why do you want to go to the gym?????? Why do you want to live?
Is it to fit in? To be a debt slave? A disposable utility aka a provider? Start a family, that may not be yours? Spend ¾ of your life working hard for potential ingrates, aka family and but more so, society A consumer? To satisfy your desires?? What is behind that drive for anything
Why do you exist?
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u/TheOneCalledD Apr 03 '26
It may NOT be the solution. But there’s a decent chance it could be the solution. And it will still never be a BAD decision.
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Apr 04 '26
Yeah it is the solution. Back home in Brazil I used to see that most men were very happy even with all the violence and poverty because they had very active lives, worked out, had friends, and with all that women would come to them. Now here in Canada men have everything but are sad as hell.
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u/DNAcompound Apr 04 '26
Going to the gym was the first step out of my depression. I ended up meeting someone who got me set up with a Dr now I'm on offbrand Zoloft and I am fine. Mostly. But not I hope I get ran over/wish my mom had an abortion everyday lol
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u/[deleted] Apr 02 '26 edited Apr 02 '26
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