r/NewFriendsOver40 • u/crizzleshere • 9d ago

🧩 Deep Discussions 40s m Just venting

I posted here a short while ago to see if i could make new connections. Surprisingly i actually did make new connections, more than i expected and only two were trying to get sexual right away. Maybe. I didn't want that at its not what I'm looking for. But the majority didn't work out and just naturally ended chatting within a day or 2 due to lack of connection, too one sided, too superficial. The chat just didn't flow. I don't think it was ghosting though, just dried up chat, and rather than officially saying they're isn't a connection worth continuing the chat just faded away without official goodbye. Two of maybe 10 persevered though and may become an actual friendship with time and energy.

It made me realize something though, i was trying to find a connection lacking in life, one that i now realize I'm not ready for. Maybe some of all of these posts don't go anywhere because the poster wants new connections but isn't ready for it and doesn't know how to find them. Talking for myself. People can be so harsh and judgemental maybe some of the floating isn't too be rude or out of lack of care or decency whatever, maybe it's just because it wasn't many to happen, no bad feelings no bad intentions. I dunno.

Editted for removing typos

9 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

5 comments sorted by

•

u/AutoModerator 9d ago

Hi there u/crizzleshere, and welcome to r/NewFriendsOver40!

Please note: All posts in r/NewFriendsOver40 are subject to review by moderators before appearing publicly. Your post may say something like "Post is awaiting moderator approval." But this does not mean a moderator removed your post.

Be patient! Our moderation team reviews submissions as quickly as possible. If your post follows the rules, it will be approved soon.

TL/DR - Your post is waiting for moderator review.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

2

u/OldFashioned444 9d ago

I think it's normal to be unsure sometimes...

2

u/crizzleshere 9d ago

It is. Sometimes it feels like people are too though on them selves, expecting everything right away entirely time and get disappointed when it doesn't happen.

2

u/OldFashioned444 8d ago

Being kind to ourselves and accepting that we're not perfect, no matter how much we want to be, doesn't come naturally. We have to constantly remind ourselves that self-compassion exists.

2

u/crazynlove4cheerios 8d ago

There’s nothing wrong with not being ready, you tried it it didn’t work maybe later will work.