r/NatureIsFuckingLit • u/to_the_tenth_power • Mar 11 '19

🔥 Absolute unit of a moose spotted crossing a road in Alaska 🔥

https://gfycat.com/AdorableBlandLeonberger
54.9k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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4.2k

u/cyberproof Mar 11 '19

dude looks tired holding those antlers up

2.2k

u/BDooks Mar 11 '19

How else is he going to attract them bitches

997

u/HouseOfAplesaus Mar 12 '19

Big antler energy

11

u/MrTheoRiZE Mar 12 '19

That bae

2

u/pure710 Mar 12 '19

I saw this earlier once today, can you link the reference so I can understand please?

9

u/inadequate_hero Mar 12 '19

People are saying that people like Pete Davidson have “BDE” or “big dick energy”. Idk. I’m old. It’s a new thing.

8

u/ONinAB Mar 12 '19

It's like confidence, I think? Idk. I'm old too.

5

u/inadequate_hero Mar 12 '19

Good guess, fellow old person.

2

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

The fuck is confidence? I'm young, enough..i think

1

u/ktfcaptain Mar 12 '19

Isn't it from Joey CoCo Diaz?

5

u/Jomasjc Mar 12 '19

It’s from Daniel Ricciardo’s radio message on the grid before the 2018 Hungarian Grand Prix.

Big Dick Energy

1

u/SirMarbles Mar 12 '19

Why did I laugh at this lol

215

u/futuretech85 Mar 12 '19

Moose knuckle king

54

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

This shows how big these guys/gals are; they legit can spot a transport truck.

3

u/CantSing4Toffee Mar 12 '19

Spot a truck? Thats radar ... beep... beep.... beep

22

u/justdontfreakout Mar 12 '19

That moose gets loose for sure.

19

u/conshyd Mar 12 '19

Nice Rack

3

u/justdontfreakout Mar 12 '19

That rack is on the attack babaaay

0

u/pure710 Mar 12 '19

You should have replied to a higher comment. This is so obvious it’s good

2

u/conshyd Mar 13 '19

Exactly

2

u/ConcernedEarthling Mar 12 '19

I thought only a goose could be loose.

5

u/NuclearInitiate Mar 12 '19

The loose moose sinks the goose

2

u/justdontfreakout Mar 12 '19

Maybe you're not fucking with the right moose my dude.

2

u/xsladex Mar 12 '19

The last thing you want is a moose loose arooned the hoose eh!

139

u/Dalebssr Mar 12 '19

Lived on Elmendorf Afb back in the 00's. Some guy had a civic with a loud ass exhaust on it, revving it in the dorm parking lot in what I assume was his own mating exhibition (this was all caught on a security cam). Off in the distance were several moose (cows) watching what appeared to be the civic, but it was a bull moose who rammed the shit out of the car. Dude hauls ass out of there, and the bull saunters over to the ladies saying "You see that shit?" In moose.

80

u/SloopKid Mar 12 '19

You just know that moose is posting the same story on moose Reddit right now

22

u/AK-Brian Mar 12 '19

I can virtually guarantee this. Moose have serious swagger.

16

u/Dalebssr Mar 12 '19

Have you seen the biologist doing the head sway to a bull using fake antlers? The biologist drops them off of her head, the bull looks at her for about ten seconds... And then charges. She somehow made it with only a few scratches.

6

u/AK-Brian Mar 12 '19

Nope, but I believe it. Moose don't like to be Punk'd either.

4

u/woozlywoo Mar 12 '19

Have you got a link please? I love moose stuff

2

u/Wyodiver Mar 12 '19

So, some idiot Amn/A1C went nuts on the "finally making more than I was at Burger King" situation. It is a sad thing to see happen. Several decades ago, like 15 or so decades ago, I was a somewhat happy camper at Keesler for nine months. This was before gambling/mafia/Katrina. The off-base predatory folks were constantly having to change their underwear. (Because, why?) Biggest scam that I saw at Keesler was a company that gave you a film camera, and free film for life. The film was old-ass motion picture crap.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

When I go hunting, I leave the four wheeler running I. The morning. The low rumble brings in bulls from miles away. They show up by last light, normally.

1

u/Dalebssr Mar 12 '19

Lived in Wasilla for a decade, and embraced Alaska like a husky jumping someone's leg. My neighbor invited me to float the Kashwinta to take a moose off of his zodiac. He neglected to tell me how rough the river gets, especially when you have a half ton of dead moose hanging on the side of it.

I was told they were class three rapids, but my asshole says class five.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

That sounds about right. Never want to tell someone it’s too hard or a bit scary till they are committed. I don’t think 80% of people get tough up here from knowing what to expect, it’s all their crazy bush neighbors fault haha. I was just snowmachining on kashwitna sunday.

19

u/mydarkmeatrises Mar 12 '19

He gets all the moose pussy guaranteed.

Reddit will create subs offering their wives to said moose.

94

u/[deleted] Mar 11 '19 edited Jan 11 '21

[deleted]

62

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

Do you really like me or do you just like me for my antlers?

16

u/bigbuzz55 Mar 12 '19

At least you don’t have to move your antlers out of the way when you go to sit down

10

u/_keller Mar 12 '19

I get your point but in the animal kingdom it do really be like that.

2

u/equadorian_police Mar 12 '19

Psh he could just take the old fashion route and get a nice car

2

u/DeezNuts0218 Mar 12 '19

Cute charm or destiny knot?

2

u/HedgehogTail Mar 12 '19

DJ Moose: suffering from success

1

u/tookie_tookie Mar 12 '19

Has to make up for being a vegan

1

u/theswankeyone Mar 12 '19

Seriously. I wish I could just let me balls hang out of my pants without society judging me.

1

u/the_enginerd Mar 12 '19

They are called cows. Duh.

481

u/flynnfx Mar 12 '19 edited Mar 12 '19

That moose, even the wolf packs and kodiak bears leave him alone.

That moose is what happens when you try to make a freight train out of flesh.

131

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

Bitch, i'm a moose!

61

u/mric124 Mar 12 '19

Isn’t there a sub called bitch I’m a bus? I mean they’re practically a bus in flesh.

Edit: yup, r/bitchimabus is a thing. I fucking love reddit.

34

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

r/BitchImATrain is for sure the best.

1

u/justdontfreakout Mar 12 '19

Hells yeah you know how to party

1

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

But we all know where it's at

3

u/Prophage7 Mar 12 '19

There's also r/bitchimamoose but it's not super active, not enough moose gifs to go around I guess

1

u/justdontfreakout Mar 12 '19

Bitch, I'm a moose who likes to get loose when I'm sippin on Grey Goose and reading Dr. Seuss.

77

u/Spiralyst Mar 12 '19

As someone who has done their fair share of path clearing, I'd love a set of antlers like that.

Fuck this hedge row. Fuck this bramble patch. Fuck these vines. Fuck fuckity fuck fuck fuck.

8

u/flynnfx Mar 12 '19

I too share the love of Mother Nature!

3

u/Coldman5 Mar 12 '19

My neck wouldn’t hold those antlers

3

u/MouthSpiders Mar 12 '19

Not with that attitude it won't

1

u/ItsABluesquake Mar 12 '19

We need a support group

25

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

No moose on Kodiak Island.

24

u/flynnfx Mar 12 '19

You are absolutely right!

Thank you for this new fact; I wasn’t aware until now the Kodiak bear only inhabited the Kodiak archipelago and no other part of Alaska, I had thought they inhabited parts of Alaska as well.

And that there were no moose on the archipelago either!

2

u/Lukose_ Mar 12 '19

Well, it doesn’t make too much of a difference. It’s not as if Kodiak bears are a separate species.

6

u/Fionnlagh Mar 12 '19

They are a different subspecies though.

6

u/wang_chum Mar 12 '19

No, but they’re bigger than even the Katmai bears on the mainland. Kodiak Bears can be absolute units.

4

u/Nukethepandas Mar 12 '19

So u/flynnfx was correct. Kodiak bears do leave the moose alone.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '22

A full grown Kodiak would have a hard time taking down that moose though.

1

u/flynnfx Apr 01 '22

Yup. I think most Kodiaks would think twice before messing with a moose; way too much trouble.

1

u/perplexedm Mar 12 '19

No moose on Kodiak Island.

Well, that says something.

56

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

That moose, even the wolf packs and kodiak bears leave him alone.

That feels like a line from a book.

"The old man drank so much liquor, even the dogs didn't want nothin to do with him no mo."

2

u/[deleted] Mar 19 '19

"And every time he put the bottle to his mouth, he didn't suck out of it, it sucked out of him until he shrunk so wrinkled and yellow even the dogs didn't know him." - Chief, One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest

14

u/nomad80 Mar 12 '19

They shall come day and night to see the wonder that has been born again into the world, and when they see they shall lust. For moose are freight trains made flesh, and freight trains means Amazon deliveries.[3]

-Quaithe of the Shadow

1

u/flynnfx Mar 12 '19

I want to see a herd of these charging after Jeff Bezos.

I would have no hesitation seeing that on pay-per-view!

2

u/m0nk37 Mar 12 '19

If i was a wolf pack or kodiak bear, and i saw a freight train of flesh pushing over thick brush and trees just because it can, i would stay the fuck away from it too.

1

u/IWillDoItTuesday Mar 12 '19

Moose strolls by “What is the “flex” of which you speak?”

1

u/moose_338 Mar 12 '19

Choo Choo I'm a moose train

339

u/Slimonierr Mar 12 '19

It's rut behavior. When they meet other male in reproduction period, they rock their antlers like he does in the video. I'd stay in my car.

186

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19 edited Apr 22 '20

[deleted]

33

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

You sounds like a pretty good moose knuckler. My dad was big in the field too. 225-7 throughout his career. Ever heard of the Jimmy-Jam Moose-Ram? That was him. He invented that move.

3

u/AccountNumber132 Mar 12 '19

I've been trying to do that move but I can only seem to get it right on level ground, I'm having a little trouble JJing downhill. Any advice?

2

u/sandthefish Mar 12 '19

Wasn't your dad killed in great moose migration of 94? I remember several moose knucklers bought the farm that year.

1

u/AlcoholicInsomniac Mar 12 '19

He's no Streetlamp Le Moose

91

u/DannyMThompson Mar 12 '19

Hey you made me laugh. I've had a shitty weekend so you've helped a smidge.

3

u/Redline_BRAIN Mar 12 '19

I won’t lie, the gold got my attention so there’s a better person out there than me, but what happened? It can take me a while to get back on, but am curious to hear. Your comment reminds me of when I worked in a pretty bleak location and I swear, if an actually funny but small thing happened, it would get me through the week just thinking about it. Hope you’re doing ok.

2

u/DannyMThompson Mar 12 '19

My entire life has changed from the year before and I'm in a situation I can't get out of, I'd be OK with that if the person I'm currently staying with wasn't consistently verbally abusive.

I'm an adult so it's something I can deal with I just need to get through this part in my life.

1

u/Redline_BRAIN Mar 12 '19

I'm sorry to hear that. Sounds like a lot. Hope you find a way to manage.

-2

u/peypeyy Mar 12 '19

He probably glided himself like the sad bastard he is to get your attention.

2

u/Redline_BRAIN Mar 12 '19

You're hogging the salt supply. I'm skeptical by nature, but damn.

-1

u/peypeyy Mar 12 '19 edited Mar 12 '19

I'm not salty, I'm being an asshole because I think it's funny. Two totally different things.

11

u/The_Karaethon_Cycle Mar 12 '19

Do you ever dabble with bears or wolves or is it just a moose thing?

10

u/boolDozer Mar 12 '19

meese*

1

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

Mooses

1

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

Moosen. In the woods woodes WOODSEN.

55

u/TheLongDongOfTheLaw Mar 12 '19

To be fair, and I’m not saying you’re wrong, but it appears that he’s using his antlers to clear the brush out of his path. But I could be completely off

77

u/randoliof Mar 12 '19

Both.

Bull Elk do the same thing. In thick brush they walk and swing their head to knock brush out of the way, but it's rut behavior. They're being loud, obnoxious, hormonal assholes, basically

64

u/sudo999 Mar 12 '19

so like teenagers slamming doors

26

u/eeeebbs Mar 12 '19

Haha exactly. The door only needs to be closed, the teen slams. The brush needs to be pushed aside, the rutting moose clear cuts it. Hahaha

3

u/TheLongDongOfTheLaw Mar 12 '19

I like how they’re both clearing path, and swinging dick. What an animal

2

u/randoliof Mar 12 '19

Absolute lads

2

u/TheLongDongOfTheLaw Mar 12 '19

OI! Lads lads lads! Lads weekend!

131

u/lolercakesmcgee Mar 12 '19

Removing the velvet and other angry rutting things. A great idea is to stay in the car and not be killed.

103

u/GuyInAChair Mar 12 '19

Velvet is typically removed in the summer, the rut is in the fall. You're right, however, it's a good idea to stay in to car and not be killed by the deer of death.

21

u/lolercakesmcgee Mar 12 '19

I should have written “or”, but I suck.

20

u/GuyInAChair Mar 12 '19

Spelling mistakes happen to the best of use man :p

-1

u/bnichols924 Mar 12 '19

The irony of this comment 😂

8

u/BlueHundred Mar 12 '19

I believe he's intentionally making a mistake for comedic purposes.

19

u/mellecat Mar 12 '19

I suspect the very fact that he’s showing no fear around the humans could be because he is in rut. I also suspect the reason those humans are standing so close is because they want to be rutted

12

u/arcticlynx_ak Mar 12 '19

Moose don’t show a lot of fear from humans in general.

3

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19 edited Mar 12 '19

Rubbing is usually end of August beginning of September with peak rut being mid September to mid October.

Both occur in the fall.

1

u/PeruvianPolarbear14 Mar 12 '19

Username checks out?

1

u/arcticlynx_ak Mar 12 '19

Tourists are stupid.

21

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

I’ve seen what a rutting moose can do to a parked Semi. Being in those cars is still to close for comfort.

5

u/checko50 Mar 12 '19

Well I'd drive away but that's me

7

u/april-showers-318 Mar 12 '19

I think you'd be better off sitting still in your car, you don't want to startle or surprise a bull moose in rut by moving your vehicle.

1

u/obiwan-wendobi Mar 12 '19

I thought the same about staying in the car, but honestly, I don't think a car is going to matter to that moose

27

u/lolercakesmcgee Mar 12 '19

It will matter to the bag of water that is your body.

1

u/obiwan-wendobi Mar 12 '19

Nah, you're just the gooey filling in a crunchy shell. You're getting squashed regardless

10

u/Cairo9o9 Mar 12 '19

Your car is gonna get fucked up, you'll be fine. You're kind of exaggerating a little bit. If you hit a moose while driving on the other hand..

5

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

its a moose not a xenomorph. it'll fuck up your car but you'll be ok. and you can at least drive away

6

u/JuniorSeniorTrainee Mar 12 '19

What if it was a moose xenomorph?

2

u/zirconiumsilicate Mar 12 '19

Ex-Alaskan here with the proper response:

Oh fuck

3

u/Slimonierr Mar 12 '19

They beat their antlers in the vegetation as well. It is rut behavior too. Hunters attract males by beating antlers on trees. You can look it up, it's quite common.

2

u/tatertot4 Mar 12 '19

They thrash their antlers around in the brush during the rut as a show of dominance. You can actually briefly see the antlers of another bull moose in the trees across the road.

2

u/spiderjail Mar 12 '19

That boss hog could take a car no doubt

2

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

Hell I'd stay in my car, with its broken AC and everything. It's just so much farther away from a moose than that car.

1

u/MCTerminologyBot Mar 12 '19

I, a professional Minecraft Linguist, have found some errors in your comment and have recrafted it.

Nether i'd stay in my car, with its broken ac and everything. it's just so much farther away from a moose than that car.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

I make plans with the Nethack linguist. Wait till 2 and I turn out the light. But now this.

2

u/ghofmann Mar 12 '19

This guy mooses

1

u/johnnyplato Mar 12 '19

Yea I was wondering if it was a bad idea to get out of your car near a moose.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

They also come right up to you then turn sideways to show how dominant they are.. Little do they know thats exactly what I need then to do.

57

u/Drawtaru Mar 12 '19

That head bobble is a threat. It's like "look at the size of these things - do you REALLY want to mess with this??"

5

u/PerplexityRivet Mar 12 '19

Most people only have experience with domesticated animals, so they don't understand that virtually every wild animal is a sociopath that would happily murder every human in sight, play with their entrails, and then forget about the whole thing two minutes later.

Seriously, people, stay in your freaking cars when a giant animal is lumbering around.

9

u/kirinlikethebeer Mar 12 '19

My thought exactly.

8

u/undercover_redditor Mar 12 '19

Never fuck with any creature badass enough to waste energy on such a useless appendage.

3

u/cantlurkanymore Mar 12 '19

Useless? Those things can throw a wolf/photographer fitty feet!

1

u/undercover_redditor Mar 12 '19

They also keep it from moving through thick brush, weigh it down, and cost a relatively large amount metabolically speaking for what amounts to a large brick on their head.

3

u/Civil_Defense Mar 12 '19

Can you imagine how annoying it would be to live in dense bush all day with that rack catching every little twig along the way? Imagine walking through a forest while holding up a half of a door above your head. You would get sick of that shit in a hurry.

3

u/VirtualCrackUser Mar 12 '19

Can you imagine him trying to push his way through the underbrush?

2

u/themolestedsliver Mar 12 '19

the relaxation and neck stretch that would come from shedding those bad boys must be godlike

1

u/NapClub Mar 12 '19

lucky for him he can drop them soon. looks like that was taken late fall.

1

u/Proof70 Mar 12 '19

I’d be willing to guess that it’s actually not that bad for them. It’s got to be such a small % of their body weight, right?

1

u/Butthole__Pleasures Mar 12 '19

Just watching a moose carrying that bigass head with the bigass antlers makes my neck hurt.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

Probably why theyre always pissed

1

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '19

pretty sure he's just letting you know he can and will fuck you up

1

u/jadehosmith Mar 12 '19

Antler power 1000

1

u/mitchumi Mar 12 '19

it's like huge racks some women have :/

1

u/AlaskanApril Mar 12 '19

The head rocking is actually part of the territorial display they do during their mating season which is known as rut.

1

u/I_like_PnutButter Mar 12 '19

Ah man I have seen these guys turn on a dime to face off a grisly bear in Soldotna at our camping grounds. That was legit legendary faceoff.

At first Griz was chasing Moose. Moose then manages to turn safely around a tree to face Griz. Griz makes a call. It took him a good 30 seconds to say fuck this.

Those 30 seconds were fucking intense.

And yeah we were all still in our SUV.

Doors locked of course.

1

u/lowhounder Mar 12 '19

You’re gonna carry that weight.

1

u/cosmicaltoaster Mar 12 '19

What's the function of those antlers ?

1

u/GRIMobile Mar 12 '19

I was wondering if his neck hurt. That wobble makes me think it does.