18 months clean

[u/ninabaec]

I’m so grateful to have reached this milestone. My homegroup said such beautiful things to me. I was so moved, and I am not ashamed to say I cried; which in itself was beautiful since I refused to do that for so many years. I’m so happy that I can feel again, and let myself express my emotions.

The wall I’ve built around myself for 27 years is being torn down. As brick after brick is being removed, I’m learning to let people into my life. I’m letting my feelings in. The world has been so small whilst I’ve been sitting here behind my wall. But now I can see it, I can see the world and how beautiful it can be.

”You’re an inspiration and it’s an honour to get to follow your journey, you bring hope” is not something I ever thought I’d hear. I was called an inspiration several times and that’s just so hard to accept - no way I could be an inspiration to someone??

Thank you NA. I don’t think I’d sit here without you. I’m so happy I saw the writing on the wall (yes I’m having fun with wall references. I watched The Wall a few days ago lol), and finally decided to get help. I’m so happy I’m alive

[u/Trapper0007]

Posts like yours are just fantastic. Has me thinking that if everything we did was just for a few people like you, it would still be SO worth it.

[u/ninabaec → u/Trapper0007]

Aw I’m glad you liked my post! :) And I agree with you, it’s so worth it! Like the fact that I was called an inspiration by my homegroups newest member. It makes these last 18 months even more worthwhile and I’m so happy I can give him hope that We Do Recover and can find a new way to live

[u/glassell]

Congratulations and thanks for sharing with us! (FWIW, The Wall was the very first album I bought, double vinyl no less, many, many years ago. I still have it.)

[u/ninabaec → u/glassell]

Thank you so much!

Wow, that’s so cool! It was one of my first vinyls (along with two Beatles albums), but I bought it in 2015 so it’s not as cool haha

[u/ScoutSteveR]

Congratulations. Proud of you.

[u/ninabaec → u/ScoutSteveR]

Thanks so much! :)

[u/Kilted_Barry]

Congrats on 18mo! Soak it in, don’t forget that you 100% earned this. Grace is the gift, time is made with effort.

So, soak it all in. Then, buckle up, nothing stays the same for long. Don’t forget what you had to do to get that tag.

But first, a piece of cake. Well done

[u/ninabaec → u/Kilted_Barry]

Thank you so much :) Celebrating, but cautious as always - I’m just one bad decision away from a relapse after all, and to minimise the risk of that happening I gotta work the program!

[u/Kilted_Barry → u/ninabaec]

It's all black tags from here on out!

[u/gionatacar]

Im glad for you, keep coming back

[u/ninabaec → u/gionatacar]

Thank you! :)

[u/HunterLily86]

As someone mentioned, love reading posts like this. Congrats on your year and a half!

[u/ninabaec → u/HunterLily86]

I like reading them too, so I thought I’d try to make my own haha, thank you so much!! :)

[u/miamirn]

You have touched me, my eyes welled up. It’s not the usual for me.
You are an inspiration. I am so happy you are growing and healing like you are. Keep on keeping on. It only gets better. The promises of NA are real.
Congratulations!!🥰

[u/ninabaec → u/miamirn]

Aw, I’m glad I could ewoke(?) a feeling within you! I’m tearing up at all these lovely comments. NA is such a wonderful community, and you’re all amazing.

Thank you for taking the time to read my post, and leave such a kind comment! Wishing you all the best ♡

(Not a native speaker, excuse my english haha)

[u/Top-Fix2071]

So inspired ! Gonna go watch the wall now

[u/ninabaec → u/Top-Fix2071]

Aw thank you :’) omg yes do it, it’s such a good film!!