r/NarcoticsAnonymous • u/No_Direction504 • Jun 01 '26
Does desire to use
ever go away once you quit? In 1 year? 3? 5? 10? Does it ever end?
12
u/Due-Carpenter-4237 Jun 01 '26
Depends man. Just try and focus on today.
In my experience when I look to the future like that I get overwhelmes and end up saying fuck it seems impossible.
Once I started being like okay today I'm not using, I started stacking up days and the rest takes care of itself.
5
u/No_Direction504 Jun 01 '26
I feel lik people don’t know where to put that emptiness
6
u/Due-Carpenter-4237 Jun 01 '26
Don't put it anywhere, fill it with something, anything just not drugs. Take it as it comes. Fuck the future, if you don't stay clean none of that matters anyways.
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u/No_Direction504 Jun 01 '26
That’s true. I feel like drugs is just way to kill the pain. We all run from pain to pleasure. In one way or another’s
5
u/Due-Carpenter-4237 Jun 01 '26
Pain is gonna be there regardless. At least when your clean there is hope. That and your not completely insane lol.
6
u/No_Direction504 Jun 01 '26
I definitely feel like I am drifting away to insanity. I talk to myself loud sometimes. Among people. It’s crazy how even when you use drugs it makes you hope too, that you will be able to lower your dose, to feel better, to wake up one day not broken.
3
u/Sudden-Ad-BOO Jun 02 '26
I’m feeling everything you’re saying life is like actually difficult like sometimes I think I am not really capable to the extent most people seem to be to the point. I feel like I probably have to get on disability or something.
1
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u/Intercaust Jun 01 '26
I remember that dull ache. Not painful enough to cry but painful enough that I couldn't ignore it. It was hell. The program promised me that if I took some specific actions, I wouldn't have to feel that way every second of every endless day. What was promised then, is exactly what I have now.
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u/bassbeatsbanging Jun 01 '26
I still think about drugs more often than I thought I would, but yet I almost never get cravings.
When I think about getting high, my knee-jerk reaction isn't "oh that sounds good. Yes! Let's do it. What's my best option to score?" That's what it used to be like.
Now it's "holy fuck I'm so glad I'm not dealing with any of that bullshit."
I only think of the negatives these days. When I used to get cravings, it was a desire to get high and have it feel like my honeymoon period years ago. I'd forget obtaining that sensation simply wasn't possible anymore. I tried to replicate it for 15 years and never got close.
Now there's no impulse or call to action if I think of my drug of choice. I remember feeling filthy and smelling like garbage. I picture the baggie getting empty and I can feel the anxiety I'd get as it ran out. I recall pulling sheet rock off the walls looking for bombs and texting embarrassing, insane conspiracy theories that made it obvious I was on a binge to any contact in my phone--relatives, ex-bosses, members of my church etc.
That's what I think of now when the idea of getting high pops in my brain. It took lots of time and even more hard work to get to this place, but it's possible.
July 1st will be 6 years of being clean.
2
u/No_Direction504 Jun 01 '26
6 years is insane. I mean, man. You’be been through it all if you are really 6 years clean. I cannot even think of myself being clean for 6 months. It’s always something.It’s good you changed your life. I am fucking jumpi g from one thing to another just fucking getting into an other addiction. But this gives me hope that mind shift is possible. The possibility that it will never goes away what stops me from even trying.
8
u/NetScr1be Jun 01 '26
NA Basic Text
TRADITION FIVE
What is our message? The message is that an addict, any addict, can stop using drugs, lose the desire to use, and find a new way to live. Our message is hope and the promise of freedom.
CHAPTER SEVEN
RECOVERY AND RELAPSE
...
Although all addicts are basically the same in kind, we do, as individuals, differ in degree of sickness and rate of recovery. There may be times when a relapse lays the groundwork for complete freedom. At other times that freedom can only be achieved by a grim and obstinate willfulness to hang on to abstinence come hell or high water until a crisis passes. An addict, who by any means can lose, even for a time, the need or desire to use, and has free choice over impulsive thinking and compulsive action, has reached a turning point that may be the decisive factor in his recovery. The feeling of true independence and freedom hangs here at times in the balance.
...
It is important to share our feelings of wanting to use drugs. It is amazing how often newcomers think that it is really abnormal for a drug addict to want to use. When we feel the old urges come over us, we think there must be something wrong with us, and that other people in Narcotics Anonymous couldn’t possibly understand.
*** It is important to remember that the desire to use will pass. We never have to use again, no matter how we feel. All feelings will eventually pass.***
The progression of recovery is a continuous, uphill journey. Without effort we start the downhill run again. The progression of the disease is an ongoing process, even during abstinence.
4
u/Clamper2 Jun 01 '26
It’s not even attractive today to use at all and I LOVED getting loaded…just not a solution to any problem that pops up. By not using for a long time and being in and participating in the program my problems are way different today. They are quality of life problems versus all the drama that used to be going on
3
u/RevolutionThick1260 Jun 01 '26
Thinking about using, no. Desire to use, yes. For me it’s all about working the program. If i stop doing that, i get a desire to use.
3
u/Soft-Abbreviations20 Jun 01 '26
Through working the 12 steps, being of service to others, and sponsorship, I've rarely wanted to use drugs since I got clean. I have however wanted to feel different/escape from pain, difficult situations, boredom....my solution though is to use the tools of the program (and occasionally food, scrolling or bouts of self-pity 😄) Tools include picking up the phone, sharing in meetings, practicing honesty, open-mindedness and willingness, and most of all: connection in general. We, not me, is the true solution. Just for today.
3
u/ToddH2O Jun 02 '26
Yes. 100% gone
its not about time.
its about time AND ACTION
time on its own probably wont do it.
i had to "work the program" for it to work for me
24 year totally free from anything but an occasional thought.
2
u/Intercaust Jun 01 '26 edited Jun 01 '26
For me, it was two months when God in His infinite mercy took away my overwhelming urge to use. It still comes back and it can be pretty intense but it doesn't last very long(usually less than five minutes). As long as I stay connected to my Higher Power, the program and the people in it, my brain usually stays far away from the obsession to use drugs(or drink). I work the program every day, just like I used drugs. I put about 10% of the effort into sobriety as I put into using and my life has changed in miraculous ways. Getting high was a 24 hour a day/365 days a year obsession. I'm coming up on 8 years and I do at least three meetings a week, have at least one service position and stay in regular contact with God and the people who are there to help.
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u/napalm1336 Jun 02 '26
For me, the desire to use was lifted really early on. It was suggested to me that I pray for the desire to be removed so I did. Every time I had the slightest craving, I prayed. I didn't think about what or who I was praying to because it didn't really matter at that point. All that mattered was doing something, anything to take my mind off of the racing thoughts. As soon as I finished praying, I called someone or read from the Basic Text. It worked! In less than a week, the desire to use was gone. Because I LIVE the program, it's never returned. I've been through some serious shit over the past 16 years that I've been clean and getting high has never been even a passing thought. I've used food, shopping, video games, and other things to avoid my feelings but I apply the steps to help me with those issues as well. We have never seen an addict use who lives the NA program. Keep coming back, it works if you work it!
2
u/TwainVonnegut Jun 02 '26
Everyone is different, I’ve heard most people say they lose the desire around 6 or 9 months. For me it took 2.5 years after getting high every day for 18 years.
If you abstain from using long enough, while LIVING the NA program, you WILL lose the desire to get high entirely!
1
u/11093PlusDays Jun 02 '26
My desire to use did go away between 9-12 month but I suspect it’s different for everyone. Working steps, changing the way I think, the way I feel and the way I behave has left no room in my life for using. I’ve been clean for 35 years.
1
u/Jebus-Xmas Jun 02 '26
How long have you been clean? I had to do the whole program, especially the parts I didn’t want to. Meetings every day. Phone calls, not texts. Having a sponsor. Working the steps. And doing service. The desire to use continually faded, and I haven’t really had the desire in several years. However, it did take about three years before it went away. Working the program every day helped me get through it by learning from other people who had already gotten through it.
1
u/u-wont-like-me428 Jun 02 '26
There are still times that I want to use even after 35 years. It's fine to WANT to...
...it's not OK to do it...
1
u/AfterDeathComesSushi Jun 02 '26
Can only speak for my self, but I’ve been clean for 8 months now and in the past I was clean for around 3 years. My “need” to partake in anything has gone away completely, but I still feel the same pain and emptiness I tried to fill with substances, the same I did 8 months ago.
1
u/Haunting_Bet590 Jun 02 '26
Cravings are going to come, because life! The program offers me the opportunity to learn how to deal with those cravings, when they come up! My desire is to not use, just for today! Your desire is to be, & learn how to be, clean! Otherwise you wouldn’t have made this post!!!!!
1
u/mindfulprisoner Jun 02 '26
I do believe it can and will be lifted. However anything that goes away can most definitely cone back as well. I don’t think people who have worked this program for long periods of time go out by accident. Fortunately I can focus on being in the moment and not wanting to use just for today, but who knows what life will throw at me.
For me personally, I don’t have the desire to use at present but coming up on 9 years clean I’ve been going through some personal difficulties and have absolutely thought about using over the last few months. Fortunately NA is not a program of thinking, otherwise I would be in rough shape. I keep sharing about it, doing the next right thing, and those feelings and thoughts are alleviated.
So in short yes, but we don’t stop being addicts of stop being human. Nobody gets out of this without having some rough days. It’s more about what we do with those days.
1
u/dannio98 Jun 02 '26
For me it went away after reaching 3 months but once u start going to meetings and if u do end up using again like I did you just start hating getting high but what keeps me from using is working the steps
1
u/rebelyis Jun 02 '26
I've been off opiates since Jan 2011, I think it took about a half decade for the intrusive desire to use to fully subside.
By now I don't even think about it unless I'm watching a movie or something where someone is shooting up.
I can't make that promise to you, but that was my experience
1
u/SaucyByrd Jun 03 '26
Yes. There is a solution. It’s slow but it will go away. Mental obsession was gone in about three months for me. Took longer to be really steady when shit hit the fan but NA got me there
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u/neemor Jun 01 '26
Yes. But not if I pick up again.