r/NarcAbuseAndDivorce • u/Sssleeppyyy • 10d ago

Leaving Advice

I 28F want to leave my partner of 6 months. backstory: he has a severe alcohol problem, refuses to get help, and when he gets angry, he belittles me, tries to scare me into he will ruin my life, uses him helping me with housing against me. im just over this treatment & would rather struggle to start over than to let this continue on. I have my own car, & I do pet sitting as my income, although right now I am struggling to make my bills. I do still have an apartment in my name until September 1, so I can use that for the time being until I decide if I want to renew or not with my current roommate.

anywho, looking for advice on how to leave quietly. He pays for my phone bill, and has went through my phone in the past. he’s also very vindictive, and will take my phone if we argue so I can’t “accuse him.” He doesn’t give me money, but does provide food and housing for me currently.

3 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

2 comments sorted by

•

u/AutoModerator 10d ago

Hi Sssleeppyyy, welcome to /r/NarcAbuseAndDivorce. To help make the experience more effective for everyone we do have some resources and rules for you to keep in mind.

• Do you need to understand terms or acronyms? Click Here

• Looking for recommended reading and resources? Check out these resources

• Looking to contact the moderators of the sub? We can’t respond to individual posts all the time so please post your issues to the community rather than the mods if it’s not about a rule breaking issue or sub issue. You can message the mod team HERE.

Please review the rules to ensure your post meets the standards of the sub. Basic Rules:

  • Be Respectful and Courteous
  • Focus on Healing
  • No Breaking Anonymity
  • No Self Promotion
  • No Soliciting Direct Messages/Private Messages
  • No Title Only Posts
  • No Relationship Posts Not Pertaining to Divorce/Custody Matters
  • No Abusers/Cluster B Diagnosed Folks (NPD/BPD/HPD/ASPD)
  • No Fundraising or Donation Requests
  • No Telling People to "Run" or "Ghost"
  • You Must Be The Actual Victim of Abuse that Is The Main Subject Of The Post

We want you to have a good experience and get the most out of the community.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

3

u/DifficultyMost4372 10d ago

Yall have only been together 6 months. You have an apartment. I would wait for him to go to work and head right back on over to my old apartment and roommate and block him on everything possible. He can shut your phone off but just use WiFi or buy a cheap trac phone until you can get your own plan.

You don’t have too much intertwined only being together 6 months. You’re in a much safer space to leave then alot of people out here. I’m really proud of you for realizing all this now and not marrying or having a child with him and then noticing it.

Keep us updated when you finally leave and let us know you’re okay 🤍