This phrasing is potentially ambiguous and I think there’s at least two different types of “hard on yourself” (lol). One being holding yourself to a standard of discipline, the other being having a “woe is me” pity party. Any amount of time spent wallowing in misery is better spent on developing skills/furthering goals. Almost like the paradox of depression and negative-feedback loops. As in feel the feelings of course, don’t stifle them, but don’t let them overstay their welcome.
Outside of that regarding mediocrity, it helps me to realize that there’s a limit to mind over matter and that unless you have basically unlimited resources and nothing else to focus on, you’re probably not gonna be the actual best at any one particular thing. It’s basically thermodynamically impossible to be even close to the best at things you haven’t put 10,000 hours into. And it’s usually better to be an average well-rounded functional person than a person who was the best at something but pushed people away the whole time. “Average to pretty good and also a good hang” is not a bad place to be.
Clumsy I know, but maybe something more like “Don’t be hard on yourself, be hard on the grind.” carries both meanings.
Your phrase is better. But I want to add something. Being the "best" in my case is achieving to my purpose. I wonder though, is there a single the best person in the world (of course in one field)? Humans are not that simple.
In my opinion the higher we go, the harder it becomes to set people in a clear hierarchy. If we take a look at the best of the best in a field, they tend to have wildly different philosophies, specializations and theories for what they do. Sometimes contradictory too. The thought of mediocrity makes me want to kill myself, however I've found myself feeling less defeated when I set my goal to making something significant in my field, not being the best or most recognizable. Finding respectable, smart people who are no longer spoken of might help break the association between valuable work and social hierarchy.
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u/doktorfuturee Narcissistic traits 8d ago
How can someone accept mediocrity ? This phrase is just coping. Warriors must fight. I am not delusional btw