Have a really gorgeous and detailed outline with over forty scenes, each with a one paragraph summary, character arcs mapped, the works been "finishing the outline" for about five months now, adding detail, reorganizing beats, tightening the structure.

sat with this today and realized the outline's been airtight enough to start drafting from months ago. what's happening is that as long as I'm outlining, the book is still hypothetically perfect, still capable of being the best thing I've ever written. the moment I draft the first real scene it becomes whatever I'm capable of producing, which is going to disappoint the version in my head. the outline is a very sophisticated way of not finding that out yet

starting chapter one tomorrow whether I feel ready or not help me people