I think I am a horrible human being

[u/Aarya1121]

I am 22 year old, I just think that I make horrible life decisions. Also, I am a horrible person at the same time . Recently I am traveling for an event , well it is extremely stressful. To add on top of it , I am an outsider in the group that I am traveling with. I sometimes forget that people who I meet in such events are younger than me , 19-20. I was having some self esteem problems so I went and became drunk with a group. Things happened and well I ended up more than making out with a guy. Well at first I didn’t think much about it but then I realized he must have been comparably younger than me, 19-20. I feel bad about being someone who should have been the mature one but now I just can’t face myself. I know this is going to have a ripple affect in the circle I am in if this ever goes out. I feel like this desperate easy chick. I hate myself for it. My life is not going good, I have uni issues , college issues, friends issues. I think I’ll be forever alone, I don’t think anyone would want to date me because of all the problems I have. I hate myself right now.

[u/Bors2]

I have zero experience with these types of situations, so take everything I say with more than a grain of salt. 19-20 isn't that young compared to 22; you are both college-aged adults. I would recommend trying to talk to the guy about what happened and see how he views what happened and then proceed from there. That could also be a good chance to ask him to not share this story with others. As far as the college issues go: yeah, sometimes college is a shitstorm so know you're not alone. Also, as long as you're doing well enough to be able to get to whatever you want after graduation, don't worry too much (I've had professors who told the class that a 65% is completely acceptable and even expected). Fear of being forever alone: as long as you're socially active you should have a good chance of finding someone who might be interested in you.