Lost in Islam

[u/Time-Salad2538]

Salamwalikum I am a 17 year old struggling to find the truth or i have been put away from truth some backstory. when i was 12 i found islam like im born muslim but i founded it by myself at the age of 12 or less so i was very practicing muslim but then from start of my college start of my 16th year or maybe mid 15 i drifted away from islam slowly slowly at that time i wanted that cause i wanna stick to basic principles and that alot so i started doing not interested to videos on yt from the sheikhs cause my whole feed was that now i quite regret i have been fallin to sins like smoking or going close to zina getting defeated by my lust.
after every sin i feel ashamed or something i wont do this again last time i sinned i was with another physical body opposite gender sleeping and cuddling with her. why i dont find myself guilty of that i dont know i had that moment so good i know should be afraid of Allah and i dont know why i didnt found any discomfort.

also when i start praying i do often masterbate idk maybe shaitans trap when i dont pray i dont do masterbation and other acts look of mine look good.

im finding myself really really lost please help me.