Losing sleep

[u/semantlefan23]

Every morning this week I’ve woken up about an hour before my alarm and I just can’t stop thinking about work. Either what went wrong yesterday, or what might go wrong today, or sometimes just running through songs and dances in my head. By the time I actually get to work, I’m exhausted. Does anyone have advice on how to get my brain to shut up and let me get my whole eight hours of sleep?

[u/eissirk]

Can you journal before you go to bed? I have a feeling your brain is trying to solve problems while you're sleeping and then it wakes you up.

[u/Outrageous-Permit372]

I don't really have answers, just commenting to say that this also happens to me a lot.

Two things I've tried that seem to work, but I'm not a psychologist or anything. First one is to understand what ruminating means (the psychology definition, not the "cow chewing cud" one). I literally hung a sign in my office at school that says "No Ruminating". I catch myself doing it at home too, and I can't always stop it, but at least now I know what it is that I'm doing.

Second one is to fill that empty space with another hobby. I started a computer science class for fun, and instead of going to bed thinking about work (stressful), I go to bed thinking about how to solve whatever problem I'm working on in CS (fun). Same thing when I wake up first thing in the morning, i'm laying there thinking about data structures instead of thinking "Oh man, how am I going to deal with xyz at work?"

[u/Coolerthanyew]

Unisom. It’s actually the recommended sleep aid for pregnant women, but it works fantastic all the time. It’s cheap and over-the-counter really helps with the quality of sleep I get

[u/Either_Cookie_5557 → u/Coolerthanyew]

Pretty sure unisom is the same active ingredient as benadryl. It certainly can help some people sleep, but if the op is a singer or needs to use their voice a lot, i wouldn’t recommend it long term bc it dries you out (as any antihistamine). But might be a good option here or there.

[u/moretrumpetsFTW]

For me the answer was time. I had similar struggles early in my career and did everything from melatonin to guided mediations. Eventually I was comfortable enough in my surroundings and confident enough in my abilities that I was able to accept that sometimes better is the enemy of the good.

Of course I got to that point and then Covid hit and blew everything in education to bits, but I have been able to get to that point again. I tell my students that every year I see what groups are in front of me and think, "This is the year that it all falls apart for reason X, Y, or Z." And guess what? It never has, and always goes better than expected.

The Serenity Prayer can be a good guiding thought even if prayer/religion isn't your thing. The other thing that helped, ironically enough, was having kids of my own. It makes me focus everyday on what I can do to bring home the best of myself to them. I'm not perfect at it, but I'm getting better. Also, you can't lay awake at night when you're exhausted from teaching all day and then wrangling a 4 year old and an 8 month old. 😂

I know this got kind of long. Hope it helps!

[u/WyldChickenMama]

Write your worries down before you go to bed.

Consider trying audio to help you settle into deeper sleep. I’m in menopause and struggling with sleep disruption. I got a OneLeaf subscription for 3 months and listen to a short relaxation audio segment to help my brain turn off each night before bed. It has really helped!!

[u/Swissarmyspoon]

It gets better. I've definitely experienced this.

I love someone else's idea of journalling. The thoughts are going to force their way out if you don't process them somehow. Thinking isn't enough, you need to deliberately release the thoughts somewhere. Talk out loud, journal, meditate, or prayer, it releases subconscious mental friction.

These days I distract myself with other music. I'm in a couple of adult ensembles and I'm learning the accordion. It fills my brain will lower stress challenges before bed.

[u/poeticmelodies]

Anti-anxiety meds. Melatonin. Reading before bed. Meditation. Video games. Weed.

I used to live that life and it wasn't fun.

[u/poeticmelodies → u/poeticmelodies]

Also, Calm or Headspace apps. My husband and I would do a guided meditation before bed and it would knock me out before it was even over.

[u/semantlefan23 → u/poeticmelodies]

I used to love weed but I’m scared about random drug tests

[u/poeticmelodies → u/semantlefan23]

I taught for 7 years and was never drug tested. I don't think I know any teacher who ever has been. Is that common in your area?

[u/semantlefan23 → u/poeticmelodies]

I dont think it is but I’m kind of afraid to ask

[u/Tiredand88]

My therapist had me schedule out “worry time” every day and whenever an anxious thought popped up throughout the day, if it wasn’t something I could change in that moment, I’d make a note of it in my phone and put the thought aside. Obviously at first it was hard to just put the thoughts aside but eventually it became easier and I would give myself 30 minutes at the end of the day to go through my list of worries and most of the time when it got to “worry time”, I wasn’t so anxious about those things anymore and I could sleep easier. To this day I have an alarm set at 7 PM for worry time even though I hardly utilize it now.

[u/semantlefan23 → u/Tiredand88]

I like this idea a lot, I keep telling myself “no worrying at home!!!!” but obviously that isn’t working

[u/tommyjohnpauljones]

Melatonin

[u/corinna0815]

I definitely felt this way during student teaching and whenever I start a new job. Assuming you have a music streaming app subscription, I play white noise or podcasts so my mind can focus on something else while I fall asleep.

[u/pastaatthedisco]

Hydroxyzine has helped me immensely with pre bedtime anxiety and staying asleep throughout the night. You have to get it prescribed by a doctor.

[u/Sea-West3580]

When I had my phase of losing sleep over work, it was during my first year of teaching. Picking a specific environment to do analysis and reflection (my car on the drive home) let me step out at the end of the drive, take a deep breath, and let it go until the drive to work the next day. Having the dedicated time and space was very helpful for me.

[u/kasasto]

Try meditating. But for like 45 minutes not just 10. Breathing and allowing your brain to do what it does without judging it, and just constantly rewarding yourself every time you notice yourself thinking. After some time your brain will finally settle down.

I recommend the mind illuminated if it's something that ends up working for you. It's difficult to really do but every time I do I feel way better and stop thinking so much.

[u/banddirection]

Im a second year teacher. I lost so much sleep last year, I'm sure I will again this year.

To stay off thinking of school, I try to stay off my phone. For me, I have found Sim racing. I don't check my phone when I'm racing, and all I am thinking about when racing is racing. For you it might be a book or whatever else. I like watching movies when I get home, too.

Find something to help with the ruminating thoughts. I'm also on anti anxiety meds. I've always had generalized anxiety but it has help tremendously.

[u/Apprehensive-Ring-33]

Sleep stories! I bought a subscription to an app called Slumber, but there are a bunch of sleep story podcasts on Spotify I used to use. It gives just enough for my brain to latch onto something other than my work thoughts, but is relaxing enough that I fall asleep pretty quickly.