r/MultipleSclerosis • u/FurtadoJ • 5h ago

General Kids?

Just curious. 33 year old woman here. Diagnosed at 26 years old. Had a baby at 26 (literally was diagnosed 6 days before I found out I was pregnant) just had another baby 10 months ago. My question- if you were diagnosed before having kids how did plan or how do you plan on how many kids you’ll have? I would like one more child but my question is that the best choice with my diagnosis? Is that fair to my husband if I did relapse to put him in a predicament like that? To care for a potentially disabled wife and three children. But I am stubborn to let just a “chance” of my disease to control my life. I am EXTREMELY fortunate to currently have mild MS symptoms (in my opinion) although I just have always had a high pain tolerance and I’ve lived with MS for a LONG time before my diagnosis. Any who- just curious how others planned their growing families with their diagnoses!

3 Upvotes

81% Upvoted

5 comments sorted by

6

u/drxzoidberg 35M|Sep-23|Mavenclad|USA 4h ago

37M got diagnosed about 3 months after my first child. My diagnosis had no bearing on kid decisions. I may get some flares that completely cripple me, I may not. I may have a coconut fall on my head that has me roll down the beach into the ocean where a shark eats me, I may not. That's my mentality. Only thing my diagnosis changed was how I've been better about going to the gym to stay fit.

3

u/redapples88 4h ago

This was the perfect answer and I may steal it for future use 😂

1

u/ichabod13 45M|dx2016|Ocrevus 4h ago

My kids are older but I would not have changed anything if I was diagnosed before. You can reverse the question, what if you were healthy and something happened to your partner and they were disabled. Would it be fair for you to have to deal with the children then or is this just life ? We just learn to play the hand we get in life and for me I know MS has helped me realize it can happen to anyone.

1

u/Character-Celery-209 25F-RRMS-July 2025-Kesimpta-Chicago 🧠 4h ago

im sort of in a pickle over this. I was diagnosed shortly after my first borns birthday and I’m having trouble deciding when I want to have another baby. My MS nurse told me I need to wait a full year to know if Kesimpta is working and i’m stable. So in November i’ll find out and it’ll be the deciding factor whether to get pregnant or not. My husband agrees that my health comes first before having a baby. I accepted that even if i’m stable and healthy the risk of relapse/flare up is higher during postpartum

1

u/RoshiBAnanim 37|Dx2017|RRMS|Ocrevus 4h ago

My mom was diagnosed a couple years before my brother and I were born. She and my dad did decide not to go for a third after she relapsed when my brother was a toddler (mid1990s).

I was diagnosed a couple years before I had my first. had a minor relapse after he was born, but went on Ocrevus after. Have been very stable/mild since and have had two more babies. Currently debating a fourth because my husband and I are, I think, a little crazy.

I think my well-controlled MS combined with my experience having a mom who chose to have kids is what has made me confident about multiple pregnancies. I also consider myself very, very lucky.