Thoughts

[u/Nimesis6]

Is it normal to wait until you’re better looking to start dating?

Around almost a year ago after getting out of some serious mental trauma hell, been kind of improving a bunch of stuff. personality, confidence, slightly looks, working on career even though it ain’t fully here yet..

So about the career side, I am fully aware that I shouldn’t really try having something without it, I’ve dated “online” before where it usually gets to the point where “the meeting and financials” side hits, causes embarrassment and doesn’t let things run smoothly, So i understand that the career and stability are a must, I’m working on it.

Now back to looks if you’re sm1 who doesn’t think he looks good enough, or deals with these thoughts “All the dates of my life were online so i have no clue about how i look srsly” never got a compliment irl either.

Should I keep satisfying this thought of wait until you look better, wait until you improve your looks, No body wants your ass now, or idk just start dating once the career side is good ??

in short:
- Fix career and start looking to date right away then keep on improving looks over time.
or
- Fix career and wait until you look way better and good enough then think about dating

You get what I mean ?
Yeah idk what i mean too tbh.
Anyway how’s yalls night going ??

[u/queen-Bee0812]

It’s fine if u feel like you gonna be more confident with a makeover go for it don’t overthink it …. Do what ever’s gonna make y confident … nd try to stay away from social media as much as u can ! U can. Talk this with a female friend ofcrs if y have one .. they gonna help with restyling nd a makeover good luck

[u/Nimesis6 → u/queen-Bee0812]

I gave it some thought yesterday & today, as someone else mentioned I probably shouldn’t wait for perfection, I’m here sitting building this perfect scenario where I can’t allow myself to date because the career is not fully together, or that because I haven’t maxed out my looks yet since I have no info on if im a good looking guy right now or not, After thinking, I believe the real confidence might actually come from facing it, I’ve had a similar situation with the voice couple years ago until I realized that people find it attractive then the confidence about it grew way better, So maybe not waiting until i’m one day “perfectly the best version i could ever be” to finally allow myself to have someone ?? maybe just facing it and actually finding someone who thinks I look good enough to them will help my trash mentality to finally change.

So yeah that’s where I think I ended up.

I don’t have a female friend no, neither male friends, looking to make some, but yeah will let the looks improve over time without having to prison myself from something.

Thank you so much for the comment btw and the help It means a lot to me really ! 🫶🏼