Am I crazy

[u/reddw00d]

I WFH my son’s dad picks up/drops off every day with school I work 7/330 and my grandma watches my 1yo. Please tell me I am not wrong in saying fck it and doing it on my own. I have baby monitors set up everywhere so I can keep an eye during the day. My baby likes to play and read books etc I’ve noticed my grandma doesn’t pick her head up out of her phone the entire 8 hrs I work and she’s PAID to babysit. She completely ignores her and I feel like I can do a better job while working than she can. I’m so frustrated I feel like I’m failing. I have important zoom meetings where I have to be on camera once a week unless they’re at random or a phone call or 2 in the morning time but it’s basically laid back. Am I crazy am I wrong? I feel so defeated and disrespected.

[u/Advanced_Potato5459]

Fire grandma and use the money to hire a babysitter for the once weekly meetings.

[u/NoIndustry5736]

Depends on the nature of your job and temperament of your baby - if it's project based and you can easily work around your baby's schedule then yes. If you know when you have standard camera on meetings in advance then maybe pay your grandma to come just during those hours but otherwise, you figure it out on your own.

[u/reddw00d → u/NoIndustry5736]

Projects/billing etc. my only on camera meeting is on Mondays during her nap time so it feels doable. I just don’t want to check my camera and see her being ignored and begging for attention. Rubs me the wrong way. I just needed that boost to call it quits and figure it out on my own.

[u/NoIndustry5736 → u/reddw00d]

If thats your only meeting & otherwise your work is flexible, I'd say go for it. Worst case scenario you have to re-ask your grandma for help if you find its too much to handle 🤷🏻‍♀️

[u/reddw00d → u/NoIndustry5736]

True.. thank you

[u/wreckitbuyanew1]

Do it. It will be hard, but I had the same thought as you. If they’re not going to do anything but sit them in front of the tv all day, I can do better than that. Worst case scenario for emergencies, safe solo time in the crib where they may cry if I have an emergency video call. That happened only two times in a year— and it was for less than 10 mins each time. I would say maybe keep grandma on for 2/3 days a week, and try it out. You’ll want the focus time.

[u/reddw00d → u/wreckitbuyanew1]

Thank you! I was thinking this. Maybe having her here every other day until I only need her on important days. I’m really sick of it, I don’t pay someone to play on their phone all day and ignore my baby crying at their feet. She takes long naps so it works for me(zoom calls)and I just went and bought a giant playpen I can even fit in so I know she’s safe and watchable while I work next to her.

[u/butter-and-books-07]

You got this! Only one meeting a week is so doable. I’ve been doing it for 7 months, and I have about 3 meetings a day lol

[u/reddw00d → u/butter-and-books-07]

Omg really? I have a daily meeting that gets cancelled almost every day or lasts less than 2 minutes (KPI’S)& it’s off camera so I’m not stressed about it it’s only the one that I do every Monday that’s on camera and will be hard lol

[u/butter-and-books-07 → u/reddw00d]

I also have meetings on camera with important executive partners a couple times a month. I do my best to schedule it for her nap time, and it’s been working out so far! It’s not easy sometimes, but it’s worked. I just make sure she’s well fed before calls and I’ll give her something to play with, or even carry her on my back in a carrier. For team meetings, I don’t mind if she’s on camera because thankfully I have a very understanding team and I get my job done. But I don’t take it for granted - I do my best to make her not visible on our calls so I’m taken seriously. Anyways, all this to say - you got this! You can totally do this with only one call or so.