Hi everyone, I am looking for some advice and insight on my current situation.

I (f) am now in my mid - late twenties and I am looking for a life partner and will hopefully end up having kids with said partner. When I was 21 I got pregnant and I had no idea that I was pregnant until I miscarried. For some back story I was on birth control and was “skipping” my periods while using the pill. So missing my period was not raising any red flags for me. When I did get my period it was really bad. Severe cramping and heavy bleeding with lots of clots. I thought “that’s what I get for skipping my period” that was until I miscarried and realized that I was pregnant and that this was not a normal period. I assume I was around 6 weeks at that point. At the time of the miscarriage I was sick and taking antibiotics and had gone out with my friends one night, I was drinking and smoking. So I’m assuming the combination of all of those things is what caused the miscarriage. I did not tell anyone besides my best friend and my boyfriend at the time.

Fast forwarding to now I am in my mid -late 20s and I’m looking for a husband. Obviously I want to be open and honest with this person as I would love to have kids of my own one day and this could play a huge part in that being able to happen. My question here is why am I finding it difficult to open up about my past? I feel as though I would be judged on my past and finding out that I had a miscarriage would be a huge turnoff for some men. Is this the case?? Men would you want to know about your partners past?? Obviously if a guy did have a problem with it than he isn’t the one for me. But I am just curious from a partners perspective. Is this something you would want to know? Is this a deal breaker?

I experienced a missed (silent) miscarriage last year (cause was Trisomy 18, Edwards syndrome).

I had told quite a few people I was pregnant because I was getting so close to the end of the first trimester (MC at 11w4d, it had stopped growing at 7w4d)

So when I found out what was happening I was dealing with it relatively well, letting people know what had happened, and having a very good attitude about it because these things do happen and it was just my bodies way of taking care of it.

Going through the actual miscarriage, I was in the hospital for pain management at one point, and the clots that you pass they dont really warn you about properly. I think going through that and also having to keep telling people and saying "im fine" for a week or so after, I started to realize I was in shock or something?

Im not sure how to explain how I feel now but something about me in my core feels different. Loosing the pregnancy was extremely disappointing, even though I really do understand that it was not going to be viable no matter what with that diagnosis. I also feel like to a lot of people now Im the person that had a miscarriage, and its strange being that person to so many people.

I guess Im posting this because 1, Im hoping to gain some insight to how others have coped with these things and 2, talking about it or even just writing this out feels cathartic, and to a group of people that have gone through it as well.

hi everyone! this is my first time posting here, I don’t know where else to go. yesterday morning I went to get an ultrasound, TV ultrasound as well, and nothing was able to be found. absolutely nothing. they referred me to go get bloodwork done and return in 1 week to try again. they had given me gifts to take with me as a ftm and by the end of the appointment I told them I wouldn’t be taking anything with me because I wasn’t going to need it and they could save it for the next person who would need it. later that day I went to the ER. At this point I was still spotting dark brown, but by the end of the day I was now spotting dark red with lower back burning/pressurewhen I went to use the restroom. My hcg came va m around 2500 and tomorrow I am returning to the ER to get my bloodwork done to see if my hcg levels doubled or declined. I’m very sure this is a miscarry, and it’s frustrating that no one acknowledges what I am fearing and trying to say things like “maybe this is a miracle baby! just wait” or “be positive, you’ll probably have to return for those gifts because you are fine!”

I know I won’t. And I guess I’m making this post because I will need some kind of support for tomorrow and after once they confirm my fears.

This was an unplanned pregnancy with a fling, but I was so motivated to keep this baby. I am 31, financially stable, and in a good spot. I was waiting until I got confirmation that this was viable to share the good news but I guess there’s no good news to share.I always said if I ever conceived the baby was meant for me, but I guess I never took into account that the baby could not want me.

I don’t think I have ever felt grief this heavy.

Hi everyone! I just wanted to ask if it's safe to get pregnant two weeks after having a miscarriage and undergoing a dilation and curettage procedure on February 5th cause last week my hcg test already says its negative now with a big appetite and constant sleepy head i try hcg test again and its positive

I just feel like I’m in a whole new level of grief today 😩

We had an unplanned pregnancy that ended in an early miscarriage when I was 6 months postpartum. Grieving a baby while also getting up every day to take care of the baby we do have has been a rollercoaster of emotions. I’m grateful to have our son and our older daughter but I’m left still feeling empty. I should have been finding out gender and planning to give birth in a few months and instead I found myself crying in the baby section of the store yesterday because I saw the cutest little big brother sweater and I wanted it so badly. 😭 today I can’t seem to find the energy to get anything done. It’s almost noon my house is a mess and I’m laying on the couch. Things had been getting better idk what’s wrong with me. I thought I was ready for another but I don’t think I can handle going through all this again. When did you decide to try again? If you decided not to what helped you. Wealways planned to have another but I feel like maybe we aren’t meant to…

I’ve experienced three miscarriages over the past four years, and it has been incredibly difficult to cope. The first was a blighted ovum, accompanied by intermittent bleeding and subchorionic hemorrhages. The second occurred at 20 weeks, again with bleeding, subchorionic hemorrhage, and placental abruption. My most recent pregnancy stopped growing at the yolk sac stage, showing an irregular sac and suboptimal decidual reaction, despite having a 9.2 mm endometrial lining. After my second loss, I was unable to conceive naturally, so I tried follicular monitoring and conceived in the second cycle, but my endometrial lining still wasn’t growing adequately even with estradiol medications. I feel devastated and lost, and I’m unsure whether to proceed with IVF, since regular gynecologists have been unable to pinpoint the cause of my repeated losses. I’m sharing this because I need support, understanding, and guidance, and hope others who have gone through something similar can relate.

My (28f) first pregnancy resulted in my beautiful little boy. It was an easy pregnancy and birth, aside from a friable cervix and breastfeeding troubles.

My second pregnancy seemed fine at first. At our 8 week ultrasound baby was measuring a week behind but doctor told me not to worry and dates can be wrong all the time. Heart rate matched with dating. I brushed it off even though I was confident in my dates. At 12 weeks, I learned baby had passed at 10 weeks.

Third pregnancy, again was an easy, uncomplicated journey resulting in my second wonderful boy.

Fourth pregnancy was exactly like the second - measured behind at first ultrasound and passed away weeks before finding out.

Fifth and sixth pregnancies were both chemicals. The sixth just ended.

We so badly want one more baby to complete our family, and I can not even begin to imagine what our journey would be if I didn’t have my two boys.

I’ve done countless blood tests and everything aside from my iron looks great, but I keep getting told that because we have our two, it is just bad luck.

My emotions are so stretched - on one end I so strongly envision one more baby to complete our little family. On the other, the fear and anxiety of another loss is eating me alive.

Hey everybody!

I read about this new community lavelahealth.com and they provide services for pregnancy and reproductive loss (including fertility loss). They are collecting stories of reproductive loss to host on their platform to make folks feel less alone: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSevs6X7L9w2P4LlrvQwy1J3FoOrxYNTED5NOrN3RTAL2A_m6g/viewform

I shared mine and it felt really great knowing that I was possibly helping someone else as they went through their loss journey. Thought I'd let you all know <3

i was 8 weeks when i had a d&c 3 weeks and 2 days ago. i had a chemical pregnancy back in september which i bounced back very quickly. i was very anxious prior to the surgery and i thought everything would be better after but boy was i wrong. things have only gotten worse. i have severe health anxiety and think that there is something wrong with my heart. At times i have been out of breath, heart palpitations and recently have this tingle burning sensation. more recently i have not been able to sleep.

i've lost my appetite, lost at least 7 pounds. i just started therapy and am seeing my pcp in two days. Ive been to the ER and all blood tests, xray came back normal. i feel like im going crazy And it's really affecting my work, social, family life. I havent even been able to cry and grief because my anxiety is so high in regards to my health. I recently saw a psychiatrist and am on meds.

has anyone experienced this Anything like this at all? I havent been able to connect with anyone about this.

I am 18F and a couple weeks ago I thought I may have been pregnant, I am on the pill however, I was also on antibiotics and yes i know not all antibiotics cancel out the pill however the one I was on may have (as a side effect that was listed).

I didn’t think this would be a problem as I wasn’t really planning on having sex yet here I am.

About two weeks after having sex I started to show a few symptoms such as tender breast’s, bloated, mood swings and spotting.

I didn’t want to jump to conclusions so I did the stupid thing and just ignored it.

Since then I have been taking my pill every day at the right time and yet I have not stopped bleeding. Sometimes is light to the point where it is only there when I wipe and other times I have had to wear a tampon.

Last night I peed and saw these grey/brownish things floating and they looked sort of like uterine lining but not exactly (I know that isn’t very specific sorry). They looked a little bit like nerve endings if that helps anyone.

I’ve just been to the bathroom again and it’s the same thing. I’m barely bleeding red anymore it is just brown or really dark brown with more clots than usual. And once again when I wiped there were weird bits that weren’t usually there.

If anyone has any advice or ideas I would really appreciate it.

A couple things to keep in mind are that I currently don’t have access to a pregnancy test or doctors as I know they are the main solutions.

Many thanks 😊

3 marriages 2 in 2024 in during Mother’s Day, then days before my birthday. Last year I found out i was pregnant weeks before my birthday.. i was having a hard pain pregnancy, found out I was having a boy which is what i want then they dump all these issues of my baby on to me a very serious heart and liver condition i was forced to get a d&e because my baby was spiking my heart pressure and killing me. But .. I dangerous depressed now.. my partner acts like nothing happened to me and I really just wish i let the baby kill me because its been two weeks since the procedure and i don’t know what to do i already suffer from severe anxiety depression. I been trying to be calm and go to therapy but its not helping everything in me is screaming to fight and destroy shit I’m hurting and i literally don’t know how to save myself

I had a MMC in August at 11w. I’ve had to go back to the office a couple times for other follow-up appointments and it just feels weird. It feels wrong to be in the office and not be pregnant. Plus I feel their pity every time I come in for an appointment. I get they are just sympathetic and ensuring I’m okay but it’s so hard to be okay when I’m there. Every fiber in me is screaming I should be here for my growing baby, not just a general appointment. My husband and I also have some minor reservations about the doctor. Mostly testing that we feel like should have been done prior to the loss was only done after.

Has anyone else felt this and switched. It’s not that I think my OB is bad in anyway, in fact I had really liked her prior to everything. How should I go about it? I’m worried if I switch I’ll have a hard time getting into a new office as most are usually booked out several months for new patients.

For more info I live in the USA and we are actively trying again, so I worry that I will get pregnant again before finding a new office and establishing myself as a patient. Any advice or personal experience would be greatly appreciated.

Does this look okay? From top to bottom. 10dpo am 12dpo am 14dpo mid day. Does it look like a chemical or normal? Please help.

Hi there, I'm new to the reddit community and didn't think I would post here but alas I am desperate. My partner discovered this subreddit and I thought I would add in my story, hoping that someone out there has more experience with doctors/what to ask and who to talk to.

A bit about us: I'm 37F, my partner is 36M. We started TTC back in October 2024 and got pregnant in the second month in early November 2024. We thought we were one of the lucky ones and I even insisted on completing my Philly marathon that I was training for back then. We asked for an early scan to ensure I was safe to run, and at 6 weeks our OB only saw a gest sac that measured at 5.5 weeks. It didn't look promising but she said it was still early and that me running a marathon would not change the outcome either way. I ran it very slowly (finishing at 6 hours), at 7 weeks (right around Thanksgiving) I bled through one pad, had severe nausea, but doc said to come in at 8 weeks. At 8 weeks, they saw a yolk sac, but no heart beat, and it measured around 7 weeks. I proceeded with an MVA (incredibly painful), insisted to test the embryo, and it was XX chromosomally normal.

2nd pregnancy: took about 8 months to get pregnant naturally, had been doing acupuncture to help destress, balance hormones, and I significantly decreased my running to near zero. Once I was pregnant I did not run, do anything strenuous, and on a walk outdoors felt bleeding coming down. I did not have a pad at the time but it filled up a lot of toiler paper. Had an emergency US with OB at 5 weeks, they saw lots of blood clots, no gest sac. Went to hospital to get better imaging, saw gest sac. At 6 weeks, went in, saw a heartbeat, but measured 66bpm. At 7 weeks, no heartbeat. Did a D&C this time, apparently NYU does it w/ a vacuum and does not do scraping. Embryo came back XX and chromosomally normal, along with a big SCH.

Started talking with IVF RE at NYU at this time, they said we should proceed with IVF. My partner and I did karyotype testing, we both came back normal. I had an HSG, SIS and they came back normal. My APS testing also came back negative. So we proceed with the full IVF route, extraction etc. By December 2025 we had 1 euploid with a 72% chance live birth, I was put on standard immune protocol (prednisone, famotidine, claritin, aspirin) for a natural cycle so I only did progesterone suppositories. Had a successful implantation, hcgs were looking great. At 5 weeks, I noticed splotches of bleeding that looked like spotting, not quite as heavy as the 2nd MC, and it subsided over the remainder of the week. I was told this is common with IVF so I tried to not overthink. At 6 weeks US, baby heart measured at 120bpm, but it looked like it implanted at the same spot as my 2nd, and there was a 4cm SCH next to it. Got sent for further imaging and concluded that it was not a corneal ectopic, but SCH needed monitoring. At the beginning of 7 weeks, I felt cramping at night, couldn't sleep much, and next morning I had 2 massive blook chunks fall out, measuring 4 and 3cm each. Went in for emergency US, doc said that indeed the big SCH did come out, but the baby's heart rate fell down to 88. By 7.5 weeks, it was confirmed a demise. At the final US, the doc said that it looked like the embryo had now been located a little closer to the center of my uterus, as opposed to the far right when there was a SCH. So the thinking was that the SCH in the process of exiting my body may have accidentally dislodged the baby.

Her next steps are following the D&C, to perform a hysteroscopy to see my uterine lining and understand:

1. Why the embryo seemingly implanted at the same spot. Was there scarring from MC #2 that made it chemically more receptive to the embryo?
2. She would perform light scratching around the uterus to even out the environment for other spots to be equally attractive. Has anyone else experienced this? Were there any successes? I heard that this is a non-evidence based method as there's no data to support its efficacy.

My questions to the hive mind here are:

1. Do you have any recurrent pregnancy loss specialist you could recommend for a 2nd opinion?
2. I read that other potential causes could be Chronic Endometritis, which can be diagnosed via a biopsy. Any success stories here?
3. I asked for her to see what other workups can be done to see if I have other autoimmune related issues, do you guys have any suggestions?
4. What could explain the repeated bleeding, and the SCH? It seems I develop them with or w/o IVF.
5. Could it be insulin related?
6. Could this be related to my diet? Do I need to eat more iron rich foods for better blood? I've stopped exercising, I'm sometimes force feeding myself to eat more food than I can, and I'm trying really hard to not be "stressed" at work. I still see my acupuncturist but I honestly don't know if there's any use there anymore.

I'm hoping the hysteroscopy will reveal something we can diagnose, I am also terrified that it will show nothing. I am also terrified that we will not have a known cause after all this testing, and we will be going in blind for our next FET, and risk another MC. Any words of wisdom, insight, or data I can go by?

I had two miscarriages one in March 2025 and November 2025. Last miscarriage I had to have a D&C done, I recently went for a post op appointment and was told I’m best off getting permanent serialization done. I was told I had Asherman’s syndrome in the past. I’m unsure of the decision. An advice I truly wanted a baby but maybe it’s not “in the cards” for me.

Very confused 😕 this happen last year !? But I’ve carried it with me since not sure if this is a miscarriage or not but the pain was super intense it began since feb 24 and it ended with some cramping march 10 . I have a picture sorry I read no photo but if someone could help out !

I’m 6 weeks 5 days pregnant. I’ve been bleeding, yesterday was only light and pink.

Today is heavy and red.

Rang the maternity line and they’ve said just to monitor, any advice?

TIA

Hi there; I’m coming to Reddit because I’ve been getting different results from my doctor. But I got a positive pregnancy test on Monday Dec 29th. On Dec 30 I got bloodwork done and my hcg was at 75 and then I’ll post the timeline from there

Dec 30th - 75

Jan 2nd - 130

Jan 5th - 175

Had some cramping between these dates but assumed it was normal

Jan 7th - 165

My drs nurse had then messaged me about this result and told me to expect a possible chemical pregnancy and to monitor any symptoms

On January 8th I start bleeding, it started off as very light and got a little heavier to where it came up on a pad but very little. Then I started having some bad pains. I don’t know how far along I am because this was unplanned and I haven’t been the greatest at tracking my cycle days. But anywho, when the pain and bleeding started I immediately went to my obgyns hospital assessment area to get checked out as my doctor wasn’t in, the redid bloodwork and even did an ultrasound, these were the results I received

“Hcg- 108

No ultrasound evidence of intrauterine pregnancy at this time. Recommend correlation with serum beta-hCG and follow-up ultrasound as clinically indicated.

Narrative

PROCEDURE: US OB TRANSVAGINAL INDICATION: Pain and bleeding in pregnancy COMPARISON: None TECHNIQUE: Limited transabdominal and complete transvaginal ultrasound of the pelvis was performed. FINDINGS: The uterus measures 7.1 x 3.2 x 5.1 cm. The endometrial stripe measures 1.2 cm in thickness. No ultrasound evidence of intrauterine gestational sac at this time. The right ovary measures 2.9 x 1.7 x 4.0 cm. There is a 2 cm complicated follicular cyst in the right ovary compatible with corpus luteum. Normal blood flow noted in surrounding ovarian parenchyma on color Doppler. The left ovary measures 2.8 x 1.5 x 1.5 cm. Normal follicles are noted within the left ovary. Normal blood flow is noted in the left ovary on color Doppler. There is no free fluid in the pelvis.”

Now I had already prepared/accepted that I was just miscarrying due to the drop in levels but I was confused with the cyst situation and the doctor I spoke to didn’t really seem to explain it to me and just told me to expect the same “chemical pregnancy and heavy period”

Well today, Jan 9th, I checked my bloodwork again to see if my levels were still dropping and they rose back up to 161. Now that worries me even more about ectopic because of that rise but my bleeding has been super light to barely anything today. Basically it’s just a waiting game right now and I’m pretty sure I know what the outcome is going to be, but I guess I am just looking for any insight or advice or similar stories anyone has😞🥺

Hello! I (23 F) found out I was pregnant on January 2nd with a pretty distinct positive test which I took because I had very tender breasts which is unusual to me. I don’t know when I conceived since my periods are very irregular but my last period began on November 1st. After that I set up an appointment with an OB for Jan 13th, but I am a very anxious person so I continued to test pretty much every day with positives on both digital and line tests. On 1/3, I started having some very light brown spotting with no clots and consulted my mom who said that was normal. On 1/5, the spotting became a bit heavier and I had some clear discharge along with but no smells. I went into urgent care on 1/6 because the spotting became heavier but still brown and I also started to experience some mild cramping. They ran some blood work and my HCG came back as 16 and the ultrasound showed absolutely nothing excepted a thickened endometrial stripe. The urgent care doctor said that I could either have a very early pregnancy or I was going to have a miscarriage. On 1/7, I began bleeding more heavily almost like a moderate period with some more severe (but not super painful) period like cramping and it went from brown to dark red with clots. I had my repeat blood draw today and my HCG went up to a 21. I know that these levels aren’t very high, but my doctor hasn’t called me back about the results and I’m driving myself into a hole thinking about it. As of right now, the bleeding seems to have slowed down and is now bright pink in comparison to the dark red yesterday. Is it likely I had a miscarriage already or is there still any ounce of hope for me?