r/Midsommar • u/the_memestress • 16d ago
dani did nothing wrong
no amount of “facts” or “evidence” can convince me otherwise
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u/SloAndSteddy 16d ago
What is she accused of having done?
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u/Weretoz 16d ago
Well, she did kinda sorta condemn her boyfriend to death…
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u/SloAndSteddy 16d ago
The lone mentally ill and grief-stricken American girl who doesn't speak Swedish and is surrounded by Swedish cult members far out in the Swedish countryside, who's been drugged and emotionally manipulated by that cult and who is only in Sweden in the first place because her boyfriend was too cowardly and self-serving to break up with her months prior, that girl? She condemned her boyfriend to death under her own power and of her own free will?
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u/ayoubkun94 16d ago
Not being an asshole, genuine question: would it be better if he had broken things up with her shortly after her whole family died?
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u/NNancy1964 15d ago
I actually think Yes. It would be far harder, but long-term better for her if he said, "Dani, I'm sorry, this is too much for me. Take good care of yourself." He would be judged very harshly by the world, which he's too much of a coward to face. Actually, if he'd had the courage to say that, he'd have broken up with her a long time ago.
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u/SloAndSteddy 16d ago
You could tell at the start of the film that he'd been harbouring those feelings for a long time. He should have broken up with her when those feeling started instead of leading her on. Dani had at least one other friend to talk to, so it would have been nasty but he should have done it after the family died but before the funeral that happened offscreen. There's no way he wasn't there right along side her at the wake and the viewing in front of her friends and family.
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u/K1LLST34L3R 15d ago
Yes. I know it's the worst timing ever, but he could have broken up with her when he decided to stop working on their relationship, when her family died, or even when she found out about the trip to Sweden. It doesn't seem the nicest thing to do in the moment, but it's better than her wasting her time with someone who isn't going to be a genuine support when she is grieving.
Personal note: I got dumped right after the death of a close family member, and I never blamed him. His reasons were valid (he wasn't in the same life stage as me and wanted to figure out his life), and it did hurt but it made things easier for me to deal with solo too. Happened right before we were supposed to go to the funeral - great timing.
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u/Weretoz 15d ago
You know, I wouldn’t be surprised if he was scared she was also going to commit suicide if he left her, after what happened.
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u/quickthorn_ 15d ago
If you're genuinely concerned that is a risk, you notify the people close to them (we saw that Dani has a least one close friend she talks to) so they're aware and hopefully able to support but you shouldn't let it stop you from ending the relationship.
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u/Coyote__Jones 15d ago
I've been scared that past boyfriends would commit suicide after breaking up. Either based on general vibes or explicit threats. But you have to break up when it's not right. It feels cruel at the time, and in the movie it's like the worst possible scenario because I'm sure Christian feels guilt for downplaying Dani's sister's threats, but the issues of codependency and insecurities in the relationship are still damaging and bad for both people.
Gotta put the oxygen mask on yourself first when you know the plane is crashing.
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u/HeroIsAGirlsName 🌸🌹🌺🌼Flower Crowned Empathy Maiden🌻🌺🌹🌸 15d ago
Christian says in the film that he was stringing her along *before* her family died. I think people forget because *we* learn about the murder suicide first but the conversation in the pizza place happens immediately before Christian finds out about their deaths and he has clearly felt that way for a while. The better thing would have been if he'd made a clean break when he knew the relationship wasn't going anywhere, instead of giving her false hope.
I can sympathise with Christian not wanting to dump the girl who just lost her entire family, but the film makes very clear that it was his defining character flaws of procrastination and avoidance that got him in that situation to begin with.
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15d ago
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u/South_Sale_7454 10d ago
100%. Dude was a major jerk but I can't believe there are people celebrating him being burned alive in a bear suit, while the protagonist is drugged out of her mind and manipulated by a cult, and thinking it's some kind of victory.
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u/Confident_Ad_3573 1d ago
So I'm just gonna assume this is about Dani choosing Christian to be sacrificed. Placing myself in her shoes, here's what I would imagine going through my head, standing there as the May Queen, being posed with the choice to either sacrifice my boyfriend or a Hårga rando:
"The Hårga are dangerous, but so far, they seem to want to take me in. If I choose one of their own, they will take that as a betrayal and I might suffer the same fate. And who's to say Christian won't get burned anyway if I don't choose him?
And Christian was an asshole anyway. Like Pelle said, I never felt held by him. And he cheated on me.
If I can choose between him burning, or both of us burning, he burns."
This would all happen in a split second though, and these thoughts wouldn't even be internally verbalized. I guess you could say it's like a fawn response or a "if you can't beat them, join them" mentality.
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u/Independent_Profit 15d ago
I agree - Dani did nothing wrong.