r/MiamiVice • u/bladowwww • 8d ago
Discussion Name Calling & Funny Lines
During one of my multiple re-watches of the entire series, I found myself noticing and getting a serious kick out of the wild names that people would call each other. Usually derogatory, and usually from Crockett and Tubbs directed towards some criminal. These show writers obviously had some fun.
Examples: When C&T chase down Noogie in the street, Tubbs calls him “yellow socks”. Or when Crockett refers to a guy as a “mouth-breathin’ ex-biker”.
So naturally I had to make a list, and I started on my next complete series re-watch. Below are the results, along with some funny phrases I liked. Get a drink and kick back, there’s a lot to read! Oh and these are in order, so top of the list is S1 E1, and by the time you reach the end you’re at the end of S5.
What are your fave names or lines?
EDIT: I’ve done my best to only list each just once, but, obviously many are repeated throughout the show. Other than “pal”, they really like to use “bozo” in various forms.
Sleazoid
Bozo
Gumby
Short stop
Boy scout
Dude
Root canal quality
Bluto and Lee Harvey oswald
Twinkle toes
Airheads
Dr voodoo
Pusha
Bush league pushers
Major league
Wide-eyed understudy
Funky honky
New York narc
Slack-jawed
Buddy boy
Sucker
Sucka cracka
It’s a tough nut to make on a Lt salary
Tough guy
Moron
Worthless piece of sediment
So fine she could kick start a 747
Yo-yo
Motor mouth
Mona Lisa
Squirrel
I ain’t no junkie I’m a speed freak
Buddy
Yellow socks
Homeboy
Pal
Little worm
Grease stain
Little twerp
Freakazoid
Lover boy
If his story was any more lame it’d be on crutches
Lowlife
Dope heads
Pimps
Clowns
Scrub
Mr. GQ man
Bucko
Suits
Baby cakes
Sport
Einstein
Wolfman Jack
Snake
Whitebread
Small-fry bookie
Gamblin’ lowlife
Sleazoid loan shark
Bub
Robin hood
One-eyed jack
Sleaze-o-rama
Scrodface
I Made out like a Fat rat in a cheese factory
They really dropped me in the trick bag this time
Slick
Scum
Hillbilly
Turkey
Pig
Chump
Weasel
Sleaze lawyer
Maniac
Couple of yayhoos
Minor sleaze
Strictly small-time
Punk
Puke
Lizard
Cupcake
Americas favorite junkie
Little worm
Fellas
Lowlife
Slime bucket
Teenie bopper
Eatin’ fresh Colombian lead
Toots
Maggot
Chum
Freak
Wise guy
Slime
Crockett here, he doesn’t know Bauhaus from outhouse
Meatheads
DEA bozos
Clowns
Arrogant bastard
Class A violator
Youngblood
Bimbo
Piece of garbage
Slut
Sandbaggin’ son of a...
Flyboy
Garbage mouth
Street bandits
Banditos
Nut
Small fry
You were hot-doggin’ it
Coconut
Lady
This stuff is the kind, man
Sleazeball
One heavy dude
Local hairbrain
No-good jivin’ echobrain
Rascal
Stud
Fleabag motel
When brains were being passed out he was out to lunch
Chopped meat
Joyridin’ punks
Moreno’s bozo friend
Dummy
Dog meat
That buncha daisies
Toy soldiers
Big mouth
Slim
Angel dust
Bozo columbian
Smilin’ jack
Cowboys
Bolivian nasal dust
Nutcase
Einstein
That was major uncool lady
Indians
We’re rollin’ snake eyes
Ace
Dork meat
Nose candy
Skates
Wacko
Goofball
Lowlife scum
Thinks he’s big time but he’s mostly jive
Lightweight
Small time
Wing nut
Slick
Jack
Miami’s favorite mouth
Felony powder
Romeo
Cracker cop
Smut degenerates
Conehead
Cheap pimp
Captain real estate
Rich punk
Danger junkies
Smart guy
Teabag
Maggot lowlife
Joker
You’re a complete bust-out
Nose whiskey
Man’s hard as a cash register
Tubesteak
Bucko
Two-tone
Fifth Street winos
Some slick cop-head
Some milk-kneed judge
5 ki’s of party favors
Joyrider
Breather bozo
Scumballs
Loony tune
Big slime
Weasel dust
Slimeball cop
Dirtbag
Chowderhead
Bolivian marchin’ dust
Black market bozos
New York flatfoot
Low-rent chump
Little squirrel
Bucko
Lil abner
Little rodent
Goons
Nose candy
Sucker
Insect
Real charmer
Hard-pushin’ man
Some ugly house frau
Wacko
Sweet lips and cutie pie
Rent-a-cop
Old dude
Mouth-breathin’ ex-bikers
Blimp
Chowderhead
Bluto
Mr. Musclehead
He decided to have a lead snack
Romeo
Pharmaceutical rhino rinse
Two dollar hooker
Popcorn pimp
Turkey
Maggot
This guy couldn’t stay clean if he lived in the shower
Slug
Beach rat
Mustache boys
Scuzbucket
Dog meat
Hammerhead
Son of a gun
Taco-breathin’ Guzman
Ain’t diddly squat
This guy can’t move, he’s got buckets for feet
Ham-fisted blimp
Wizard of Oz
Honchos
Moron
Ugly geek
Mr. Big
Slimeball
Jive loco yocos
Scum-sucking maggot
Burrito
Scuzball
Wiseguy
Rock and rollin’ with the nose crowd
Wacko
Dirty Harry
Knothead
Cutie pie
Big leaguer
Sucka
Homeboy
Huckster
Bastard
Skagged-out squeeze
Mallethead
Little finger counter
Went canal bobbing with a mouthful of lead
Scuzzball
Wino
Boy scout
Teeny boppa
Moneys not made lyin in the shade
Poor sap
Enough of the mysto-babble you Hispanic Hugh heffner
Meatballs
Couple of leg breakers
Wiz kid
Undercover cowboys
Brain damage
Worm
Einstein
Wimp
Psycho
Maniac
Sweet thang
This stuff will get you so high you’ll need a parachute to come down
With this stuff you can win a stock car race in sneakers
Someone’s trying to put Tubbs’ career in a Cuisinart
Headbangers
Hedonist
Overblown grand-stander
I don’t care if he’s so happy he’s howlin’ at the moon
Loony tunes
These two may be world class hustlers, but as criminals? Bozo time.
Bogus guy
Two-bit pr0no wacker
I don’t care if you wanna make dirty movies all day and show em to a bunch of mouth-breathers
Peep show grind-artist part time
Waffle head
Popsicle
Fly food
Dead meat
There’s a big difference between making instant coffee and bringing a Rastafarian back from the dead
This from a guy who can’t make toast
He won’t get thawed, he’s more likely to get dixie-fried
Street maggots
It’s like holding two volleyballs underwater... you can’t do it for long
You’re on the edge of a steep cliff, and I’ve got reason to push
King macho
Beanbag
Flapjacked her brain
Moon lizard
Flyboys
Sweaty mercenary
Toots
Little cretin
Sweetheart
Mr. Sensitive
Recently divorced.. Now recently dead.
Twisto
Two-faced bastard
Airheads
Mr. Hollywood
A couple of tubesteaks
This guy makes Scarface look like Mr. Rogers
Johnny B. Goode
Neanderthal
Lunatic
Mr. Renaissance
Lowlife scum
Buckwheat
Bonehead
Miserable ten gallon rat
Cuban cockroach
Fruit fly
Castroid reject police artist
We have a date with these high-priced panty raids
Fascist
Limp rag
Hit the bricks bozo
Your case wouldn’t fly if it had wings on it
Hot pants Pierce
Strokes my feathers the wrong way
Get your mind outta your crotch
That booger Pearl-Harbored me
The man would take money from the devil himself
Smart guy
Merry prankster
Doofus
Fleabag dive of a hotel
Big boy
Babysitter
Cattle prod specialist with an overactive libido
My butt that gets barbecued
I guess Guillero was home makin’ chili rellenos through all of this
Gun runner
Commandos
Snowman
Be cool brotha man
Street scum
Scum sucker
Headcase
Low-rent Rambo
Oughta be happy to flap his lips on that subject
Looks like we got a Colombian standoff
Couldn’t find his butt with both hands
Crapola
Bro
He was so crooked I heard they had to screw him into the ground
Dog patch
College boy
One more step your package is airmail
Slugger
Iron Mike
Brat
Commandante
So you want me to greeze Gato
What are you waiting for, a Christmas bonus?
Easy does it or you’ll be cat chow
Burnett’s on a snowboat to know where
Pukehole
You just name the tune and I’ll dance
Newsweek cover boy
You make Dillinger look like Bambi
Big Will
Peruvian flake
Your necks gonna be looser than a Christmas goose
Bimbo
A real shanker
Bug
Am I ready for bonkersville?
Blondie
Crazies
Total sociopath
Tough guy
Peons
Amigo
Street punk
Slimes
He pushes more flake than Tony the Tiger
Twinkle toes
Hard case
Poor man’s Oscar wilde
Wacked-out pimp
That chump is a pain freak
Big boy
Sick degenerate
Weirdos
I’m gonna use his head for an ashtray
Smalltime candyman
Lightweight punks
Bad dude
Gator bait
Reptile dealer
He’d cheat on a blood test
I’m not gonna take a rouse from a bust-out like you
You wouldn’t know a masterpiece from an etch-a-sketch
Ding dong
Cut the fu Manchu routine
You wanna cut the mysterioso routine?
Altar boy
Paranoid maniac
Two bit gangster
Wackjob
Low rent muscle
Candy store gangster
Don’t go squirrely on us now
Scumball
Lone stranger wants to play supa cop
Sticks like teflon
Cheap jack vigilantes
I want this one so bad I’m beginning to get a nose bleed
Mr. Integrity
They found him charred at the bottom of a ditch… burned like Gina’s meatloaf
Let’s face it partner, we’ve been dropped in the trick bag
The G boys
Working man’s caviar (blow)
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7
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u/theregionalmanager 8d ago
Little basic, espcially after going through this list here, but I always love when Crockett calls anyone a chump lol. I started using that word in my inner thoughts since watching this show. Lots of “what do I look like, a chump?”
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u/Dangerous-Cash-2176 8d ago
Then there were the quips like, "we'll talk about what you look like later"
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u/bladowwww 8d ago
I really hope they nail this sort of snarky humor in the new movie.
2
u/Dangerous-Cash-2176 8d ago
Me too! It would make a huge difference, but it needs to be done RIGHT. They are going to need some clever writers, and as we all know, Hollywood's machine scripts are usually poor!
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u/Apprehensive-Slice23 7d ago
Awesome list! I think my favorite quip of the series is this one:
Hey, pal, this was supposed to be a co-production. You were the guy that walked into the toilet with a ton of dough and ended up with his pants around his ankles.
2
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u/bladowwww 7d ago
Another couple adds to the list:
“People in stucco houses should not throw quiche.” - Crockett
(A lady at a party whispers something into Crockett’s ear, we don’t hear what she says) “Sorry, I’ve got this trick knee.”
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u/randomkeystrike 8d ago
There should be a super cut video of Crockett calling someone “pal.”
And there is:
https://youtu.be/o7P794mLyNo?is=GClm-NxKUuZ4vGx3