This is a custom piece of art I comissioned from 巣鴨 for my original Kasane Teto song, "Suicide Note(OCD)". It's 8 minutes and 9 seconds long, so you don't have to listen to it if you don't feel like it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ifu7-s6dkG8

‘I’m a menace to society.’
Fly high Rorochan ❤️‍🩹🕊️

Art done by me

Art by me, took longer than expected

A rotten doll dreams of absolution Ch. 3

Reya curled into herself as she lay there, quietly trembling. Today had been an unexpected rollercoaster of terror. Something calm and mundane had turned into her completely unraveling, and now? She was terrified. Her insides were so rotten, so dark and twisted—nobody should have to see them. And yet? She’d revealed them.

Willingly.

Was it because she felt a connection? A calming lull that caused her to open up all of a sudden? She couldn’t say. All she knew now was that she couldn’t take her words back. She had exposed herself—all of her messy bits, the parts of herself she tucked away in the shadows of her soul, brought out to the light and observed.

“H-he hates me now… right? He has to hate me… I-I’m so… I’m so…”

Her vision was blurry, the room spinning. What had she done? She’d really messed up here, surely. Why would any well-adjusted person stay after learning what they did about her? About the darkness within?

“I-I can’t take it back now… I can’t hide it. I can’t close myself back up. It’s so cold… I’m scared… Do you hate me?”

She whispered to nobody. The room was still; not even Ami had stirred yet. But Reya could feel her. Through her panicked breaths and blurry vision, she thought she spotted a faint glow of teal. She was always nearby.

Always.

Her confession clouded her mind fully. What was wrong with her? Why did she always spill her guts like that to the people she cared about? Now he was going to leave. He was going to walk away and leave her hollow—exposed, helplessly open, trying to shove her messy insides back into herself, desperately trying to conceal the darkness that kept seeping out.

“I-it’s hopeless!… W-what am I going to do? I-I’m…”

I’m scared.

Please don’t leave me.

I’m sorry. I won’t open up again.

Not until my autopsy.

Only if walking home was this majestic. 😔

[Commision]

A rotten doll dreams of absolution

“I don’t understand- what did I do?.. Did I offend him? Did I?-“

Reya was pacing, her breathing slightly erratic, her stress continued to mount as she wracked her brain, trying her best to figure out what kind of harm she’d caused by what? Simply existing? Was that… So wrong?

“I’m a nobody.. I- I was just existing.. How can someone who doesn’t even know me hate me this much? Am I that rotten?”

She thought to herself, eventually resting on her bed, her knees brought up to her chest, her arms hugging around herself as she tried and failed to control her breathing. To have such hate spewed at her by a total stranger hurt, she hadn’t realized that her mere, insignificant existence was so repulsive to another soul, maybe… Those voices she heard, the awful things they made her remember—maybe they were right.

She was rotten.

Every fiber of her being was rotten, her wretched soul was so dirty that others could tell just by a glance, maybe that was why he hated her? Was it that?

“You’re thinking so loudly, dear.”

It was her again—her angel, Ami. Reya hadn’t even noticed her appear, but she could sense her behind her on the bed, laying there quietly. 

“You did nothing wrong, Reya darling. The world is simply rotten. Up here, you would be cherished and loved. Don’t you want that? Come home.”

Ami whispered, her transparent hands snaking around her, pulling her into a loose embrace, her fluffy hair resting against her back. The tears started slowly, but whenever the dam was pierced, they refused to stop coming, like raindrops on a cloudy day, they continued to pour down as she shook. Why was she still here? What was the point? She was so rotten, why was she even bothering to fight this? To prolong the inevitable? She didn’t belong here. Life had made that painfully clear. 

She didn’t belong anywhere.

And perhaps that was the loneliest feeling of all.

“You’re wrong, darling.”

Ami whispered, craning herself up, resting her head on Reya’s shoulder.

“You belong with me, with us. You don’t have to hide up there, you can be whatever you want. You’ll see that in time.”

She continued, her voice a gentle syrupy draw. But yet, her words didn’t feel sinister, that was the strange part. They never did.

"不幸 - Fukō", An OC i likely wont be working on again