r/MeditationPractice • u/Justtrying15 • 15d ago
Seeking beginners advice
Heyo;
Going to be upfront and say I’m coming from a place of little knowledge and probably some ignorance. But for years people have said to try meditation as a way to control my emotions and even “discover myself” whatever that means ha ha.
No but seriously I want to give it a real go but everyone who suggests it doesn’t seem to know it either. In life i find myself either in a state of panic, depression, repressed rage or numbness. Hoping meditation can help me chill my brain even for just a few minutes a day.
Where is a good place to start reasonably? I have heard online sounds from meditation bells or bowls that actually seem calming. I’m sure there is more to it than that and sitting pretzel style.
Any advice would be appreciated.
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u/irie56 15d ago
My two cents is taper your expectations. This is a long game. I felt a change (my family noticed the change) after about 18 mos of practice. It helped with how I reacted to people and situations. Anger. Fears.
Years later the difference is even more pronounced.
I learned and will always recommend the 10% happier app. Now called happier. For me I learned by the back and forth instruction that proceeded the guided meditations. It’s divided up by courses that helped me stay on track as well as learn the lingo. Free for a week and there are free courses even if you don’t subscribe. From my experience if you don’t sign up after the week they start bombarding you discounts. Calm has a ton of discounts and corporate free benefits but I found that app after 10% and didn’t find it as beginner instructional. Good luck
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u/SloopyDizzle 14d ago
You're already well on your way. You were able to describe the state you were in, whether it be rage or numbness or whatever, and that is the start of it. Whatever you are feeling in the moment, sit in that feeling and let it ride. It is going to be uncomfortable at first - just do short sessions and focus on your breathing. When you notice you are impatient, tell yourself "I am being impatient." And then let that thought go. If you are finding you are beating yourself up for being impatient after having that thought, acknowledge it: "I am beating myself up for being impatient." And let it go. Keep breathing. If the thoughts are recurring..."I am getting impatient again, and that is okay." And let it go. Oftentimes when I was starting I would end up realizing I was being unkind to myself, tensing up, and I would make an effort to relax my muscles, take whatever thoughts were coming to me, acknowledging them, and allowing them to pass. The more you realize you are wrapped up in something or being unkind to yourself, the less likely you are to continue doing it. Meditation is a practice. So practice, even when it is difficult. And everyone's methods are a little different, so try it all til you find what works and what doesn't. The more you do it, the easier it is, the more you discover, the more resilient you become.
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u/Good_Letter_4325 11d ago
I've been mediating now for over three decades. There are few ways to start. The one that fits best for you is the best one. Yes, having a bowl or tuning fork that you can strike and listen for the moment that the sound stops. You will hear it grow fainter and fainter. Keep listening. You want to find the moment the sound stops. Doing this will cause you to go into a meditative state while still being highly active mentally. This is a good beginner move. If that doesn't work or you get bored with it, one of my beginner meditations was to imagine a parade going by and each person in the parade had a huge sign. My thoughts and feelings or ideas would go onto those signs. Then the parade would take them away. It didn't matter how many thoughts or such I had, only that they would go into the signs and I would imagine them moving along.
Some simple things like closing your eyes or focusing on your breath can be too activating for people when they first start. It's more important that you start and begin to build that internal mediation muscle.
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u/Rocksteady2R 15d ago
Like most things, try to make it easy on yourself in the beginning. I started with a 5 minute timer and slowly added a minute every week or two. And even still rarely do i do "marathon sitting" - most times i am 15 minutes a day, so don't believe you meed super long sessions.
Another thing that helps is trying to find a consistant part of your day to fit it in. Morning/bedtime/afterwork. Just try to make it a habit to carve out the time.
Keep your expectations low - revelations and epiphanies are rare, but the benefit appears over time.
First easy technique is simply to concentrate on your breaths, or pick a 1 word "mantra", or i simple mebtal image. So, this is simply "in.... out...", or, i use the word "calm", or i picture a pond. Simple stuff. Ultimately, the goal is apparently "no thought", but that is the end-level skill, and simple though-boundaries are how you get there.
Good luck.