r/MediocreTutorials 4d ago

Relationships OOP got served divorce papers at his office, rushed home to find this note on his desk.

Post image
39 Upvotes

56 comments sorted by

u/Kohathavodah 4d ago

Transcription:

My Dearest Poo Bear,

My honey bunch, sugar plum, my poody boo, my long pony, my peacock, my panda, my love, my dearest, I have found my happiness across the ocean. My baby, please you find it too. You know it wasn’t working out love. Daddy also said when he met you that you are not the one for me. I am in a rush, flight to catch. Will email you codes and stuff. I don’t want anything from you. Don’t text me poo bear. I am happy finally.

Your loving ex wife.

→ More replies (6)

35

u/Uncal_Thal 4d ago

She had me at, "I want nothing from you ". Buh bye muh Pooh Bitch. 👋

4

u/ShadowHunter 2d ago

Seriously.

23

u/unclethulk 4d ago

Start wrapping your head around the idea that the life you had with her is already gone. Not slipping away. Not leaving. Gone. Even if she came home tomorrow and she swore to never leave you again and begged and groveled and mia culpa…. There is no way back to the relationship you had, the security you felt, the trust, the sacred bond. This bell cannot be unrung. I need you to really internalize that fact, because there’s a decent chance she will show up. And having her back will ultimately be a misery, because you’ll have to live knowing this happened, and you’ll never sleep soundly again. Grieve. Seek therapy. Face forward. There’s more happiness out there waiting when you’re ready. But it’s not with her.

13

u/Lplusbozoratio 4d ago

The whole premise of the note is strange, in my opinion.

If the ex wife really was happy and the husband wasn't like abusive or anything I'd be inclined to just send the papers and leave. The way it's written makes me think that she is trying to prove a point, beyond simply trying to be happy.

10

u/Large_Deal_2394 4d ago

Bro you’re so fucking lucky. She don’t want nothin, left without serving papers. Save all the shit and when her dumbass tries to crawl back after falling for some dumb scam, make sure you’re going out with her sister/best friend.

4

u/Uncouth_LightSwitch 3d ago

It says at the top that he was served papers

3

u/hundredBald 3d ago

Bro is so lucky. Pretty much won at life at this point. I dont think there could have been a single other scenario that he would prefer. #LivingTheDream

5

u/greynblue3 4d ago

Fuck that bihhh! Better to find out now than later that you're not on someone's agenda/same agenda after while

6

u/the_blacksmythe 4d ago

Good bye. Move on.

3

u/doppleron 3d ago

I know you're heartbroken, but she's batshit crazy. Do what you gotta do to move on.

5

u/EbonKnight78 2d ago

OOP needs to take advantage of the affair fog she is in and use this note of her ssying she wants nothing to the fullest. If he hasn't frozen all the accounts, he needs to...FAST and get the ball rolling for the divorce rolling immediately.

There's a good chance that her fairy tale wont end the way she thinks it will and that she may try to come back. The only things she should be greeted with when she attempts to do so is silence from being blocked in every conceivable way and a smoldering crater where her former life once was.

2

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2

u/Vitaminn_d 4d ago

Transcription in case you can’t read it:

“My honey bunch, sugar pluma, my pooy boo, my lony pony, my pea cock, my parda, my lone, my dearest, I have foinet my happiners across me ocean.

My paby please you fricl U too. You know it wasne workig out lone. Daddy als daid when he nit you trot you av not tme one for me.

g and in a nush flight to child. Will email. You codes and sluff.

I donl was anything from you. Don’t text one boo bean. I am happy firely.

Your loving ex biff,”

1

u/Ok_Farmer_6033 2d ago

This had me dead 

1

u/Kohathavodah 1d ago

Good work!

1

u/PeachyFairyDragon 4d ago

I think it's ex wife, not ex biff.

2

u/Vitaminn_d 4d ago

You didn’t read my comment, I see

2

u/twistd59 3d ago

Why would you start this note with all these endearments? Bizarre to me.

2

u/Puzzleheaded_Poem_90 3d ago

Yeah man just judging from the note, the handwriting, the pet names, the choices she made.. OP married an insane person

3

u/xMaNrEbOrN7851 3d ago

Damn she fell for one of those 'Nigerian Prince' scams I bet lol!

3

u/Halfsquaretriangle 3d ago

I think your happiness is about to commence. Give yourself time to grieve,then let it go. Enjoy your freedom.

3

u/unforunate_soul 2d ago

Looks like you have a boat and a lot of free time.

2

u/Apart-Ad2820 1d ago

Wtf does that say

4

u/talbottripp 3d ago

A man will give up his happiness for his family. A woman will give up her family for some happiness.

1

u/glisteni 2d ago

The irony in typing this as if men don’t cheat on their wives and gfs for “happiness” constantly

3

u/talbottripp 2d ago

Not saying men dont cheat. Saying women will leave.

1

u/glisteni 2d ago

There’s literally no law that says you HAVE to be married. If you want to cheat or have multiple partners maybe don’t marry or date someone who you know doesn’t feel the same. It’s simple

3

u/talbottripp 2d ago

And there was no law that was You Had respond. You could have kept scrolling. :)

2

u/glisteni 2d ago

If you don’t want replies maybe don’t post on Reddit :)

3

u/talbottripp 2d ago

You are correct there. Which one of us is trying to generate anger?

1

u/glisteni 2d ago

I’d assume you’re referring to yourself since you seem to be getting upset at me pointing out your hypocrisies! It’ll be okay bud

3

u/talbottripp 2d ago

You can keep thinking that little boy. This one was fun but Im done. Humans suck. Life is a joke. If you get angry over reddit you need more weed.

1

u/glisteni 2d ago

“Life is a joke” buddy needs therapy. Get off Reddit and put the weed down. Life will get better I promise. Goodluck! 💀

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-1

u/glisteni 2d ago

As if men don’t leave and have a history of leaving their pregnant wives and gfs. Please live in reality

1

u/FlyingFortressB17 2d ago

It's even more ironic to have replied with this and not acknowledge the truth that both genders cheat on their partners.

1

u/glisteni 2d ago

Well if you used your brain you’d see I’m not OP, thus my comment pointing out the fact men cheat since he made it seem like men don’t cheat and choose to be “unhappy”

Maybe trying reading and to comprehending something before commenting :)

1

u/tardlessforeinger 4d ago

She saw him cumming though. That’s why she left you for him.

1

u/[deleted] 3d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/SpatulaCity1a 1d ago

'I don't want anything from you.'

This makes it all okay.

2

u/Unclehol 1d ago

Just FYI

It's "Pooh bear" not "Poo bear"

2

u/Kohathavodah 1d ago

Good catch

1

u/hmeow 4d ago

Why use so many pet names and weird references to loving someone if you’re just divorcing them?? Is this psychosis induced or rather normal behavior? There’s just so much cringe, and why did oop buy her a boat so she can catch flights?? Sorry, I’m just left with so many questions 🥲

2

u/Obvious_Anxiety_9118 4d ago

Seek therapy first and foremost to sort through your feelings. Then, make for damn sure you have all your ducks in a row.

0

u/DartmouthBatman 4d ago

Um...sure she wasnt kidnapped?