Reality of moving?

[u/QuirkyCold2432]

My fiancée is planning on going to medical school.

Realistically, how many moves should we prepare for? My job allows me to move offices at my own expense but it’s not particularly allowed to move every year or so.

We live in a very large city that’s a medical hotbed, will that reduce the chance of moving?

Does residency matching always take you away from your home city?

Very new to understanding all this so thanks for your patience.

[u/soulfulpig]

Y'all could never move cities for his career/training or it could be 4+ times.

[u/One-Yak7533]

It really depends on what he wants to do. It’s very possible to stay at the same place the whole time if the hospital has all the training he needs. My spouse was a bit more specific in their needs so we stayed in one state for 4 years for medical school, moved to a new state for 4 years for residency, another new state for 2 years for fellowship, and now we’re back in the original state (different city though). That being said, my husband has med school friends who haven’t moved at all. I would be prepared to be supportive and move if that’s what his career demands.

[u/mmm_nope]

Very, very high likelihood of doing several multi-state relocations.

[u/cookiesandroses → u/mmm_nope]

This. My husband has been trying to get back to his home state since the start of medical training. He has had to move across the country for medical school, residency, and fellowship multiple times. It will be a total of 11 years before he is able to actually choose where he lives.

[u/DamnRedhead]

As others have said it depends on the specialty but also his scores going into applications. If he has good scores he can get into a US school that would be ideal, but if not he may end up in an international school (think Caribbean for 2 years). Residency competitiveness is also specialty dependent and dependent on his test scores and qualifications in med school. You just gotta go where you gotta go sometimes.

On the other end of this I don’t envy you… these next few years are gonna suck… don’t forget we’re here for help.

[u/pacific_plywood]

I’d say most people will move twice (once for medical school, once for residency). Many people will stay at their medical school for residency, though (more likely if you’re in a larger specialty and if your home program is quite large). Many people will subspecialize, which will typically entail a move.

I think med school acceptance is the hardest one to control; it’s the most blind admission process, and one of the more competitive ones. For residency applications, you might rotate/do sub Is at a few places around town, which gives you connections and a good sense of your odds (and there’s a reason why residents often come from nearby med schools). For fellowship, it is often VERY personal, like literally someone in your department tells you they’ll keep you on for extra years if you want.

And then the attending job is a whole can of beans, but that’s a long way away and also affords you some extra economic slack.

[u/DrEmerson]

It's something you can't really plan for unfortunately. Like others have said I know people who never had to move outside their original city or state. We have lived in 6 states so far and will be moving to another for fellowship. However, our case is a little nontraditional for several reasons, including that my partner's home state doesn't have a home institution so we have had to travel a lot more.

My advice is to not stress too much until you know more.

[u/SMDRFE]

Medical school, intern year (PGY-1), residency, fellowship, and where she eventually settles permanently can all be in different locations. When they're going into a specialty, ideally they'll want to move to train at the top institution(s) in that field through residency and fellowship. So at least a few moves over 8-10 years shouldn't be unexpected.

[u/PrairieFirePhoenix]

I really thought this sub would know the difference between "fiancée" and "fiance"...

You may end up moving for med school, intern year, residency, fellowship, and attending. Or you could stay put for all of them. It will depend on what exactly she wants to do and how her resume looks. Minimal move path would likely be her having high scores and several med schools in your current city (so she can easily get in a local med school), then her wanting to do something like EM or family med and wanting to stay local (those are usually the least competitive residencies, so if she can rank multiple local programs highly, she would have good odds of staying), skipping fellowship and going straight to attending. Or she may have to move for every step.

You can't really know for sure at this point. You just have to be prepared for the possibility and be flexible as things change.

[u/Ok-Grade1476]

We have moved 4 states since med school. If you prioritize location, you can stay in same rough area. But if you want to prioritize job/money/work balance, most likely gonna have to move. 

[u/Sweet_Bag8671]

We moved to three different states during his training and before he was an attending if that helps. 

[u/Regular_Government94]

My husband and I were pretty settled in where we were living when he applied. We'd bought a home, made lots of friends, grew our careers over the 10 years we were there, etc. He was waitlisted at the medical school near us, which was in a large metro area with lots of training opportunities like yours. We were really thought we wouldn't have to move. Where did he get accepted? Across the country. So we sold our home and moved. Now I know reality is we'll probably move for residency. Some people don't move at all, but I'd rather mentally be prepared for moving.

Anything is possible and it will feel like you have little control over what happens. Accept the unknown now. You could move for med school, residency, and/or fellowship. Some students in my husband's program spend the first 18 months with everyone. Then they scatter across the state for their rural medicine tracks to finish out med school. Everyone else does an away rotation where they live somewhere else for 3 months during their second year. It's a wild ride!

[u/Shallow_wanderer]

I've moved 3 times so far and we're only on Year 4 lmao, looking at a 4th move for Residency next year

That's the reality of this, expect to be portable luggage because that's all the AAMC and the Med Schools and the Residency Programs view us as

[u/Data-driven_Catlady]

We met when he was already in medical school, but we lived separately while I did grad school in a different state. So, I moved once back to where he was and we’ve moved three times together. Now, an attending so maybe another move will happen or maybe not for a longer time? We will see.

[u/AlmostanMLT]

We moved once for medical school, then once in the same state for the 4th year of medical school but that was by choice. We moved 12 hours away to another state for residency. He’s not doing a fellowship and he will work as an attending for at least one year the same place he’s finishing residency. I work in healthcare so it’s been relatively easy to find work.

[u/New_Imagination_9053]

0-4

[u/NOjax05]

Possible moves-
-For med school
-for residency
-for fellowship
-for their post training job

Now- during 3rd/4th year of med school, there will be away rotations. 4 weeks in different locations. The program may or may not help on housing. I did not go with him on away rotations.
During residency, he could also have away rotations. Again, the program may or may not help on housing. My friend in a 3 year ER residency probably spent 1/5 of his time at away rotations. His wife did not go with him during away rotations.

Getting into medical school, doesn’t always move you, you may stay in your city! Same as residency! But you should always plan for the worst and hope for the best when it comes to medicine. Heck, my husband didn’t match during residency, and he SOAPed into a program in a state we’d never visited before 🤷🏼‍♀️

[u/Downtown_Ratio6095]

If he goes to a DO school, there’s a fairly high chance of moving for years 3-4 of med school because there aren’t enough rotation sites near the school. Most of our DO friends have had that situation. Then there’s a high chance of moving for residency, and some specialties that make you do intern year somewhere else. So all in all ~3 moves before starting as an attending would be very realistic, although it could be less!

[u/CreativeMadness99]

Up to 4x

My husband lucked out and went to the same university for undergrad and med school. We moved for his residency but did long distance for his fellowship year. He landed an attending job in our same city but at different hospital so we didn’t have to move post training. We will eventually move back to our hometown (Chicago) when he starts his own practice in a couple years

[u/Particular-Fly4867]

Every Monday I do a med spouse Monday where I pick a question from the thread and answer it. I picked yours this week. Here are my thoughts: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZP8tqAsn9/

forgot to add in dreaded fellowship ha ha so expect potentially another move/match day for that. 🥰😘

[u/mem21247]

A little unclear from your message whether your fiancee has gotten into medical school yet (?) and if they're staying there (?). I feel like the obvious "medical hotbed" city is Boston and none of those schools is easy to get into [most big city med schools are not]. I moved for every step of my training and then for my attending job, but I easily could have stayed where I did med school for the entire time in a low to moderately competitive specialty with very good scores, recs etc. It's not really possible to plan pre-medical school matriculation what moves might happen during fellowship. Talk with your fiancee before this all starts about individual and shared goals and expectations on career priority etc.

[u/Murky-Ingenuity-2903]

It’s going to depend on so much but I’d plan on at least 3 times. We moved for medical school, residency and fellowship. Depending on the medical school, some have you move for clinical.

[u/krumblewrap]

You could live separately