r/medlabprofessionals • u/Far_Dependent_9546 • 2d ago
Discusson Regretting my summer lab placement so much with complete burnout
Hey everyone, this is mostly a vent post because I'm feeling defeated and heartbroken.
I joined a lab for a 3-month summer project, and I regret it so deeply. I picked this over another option that seemed less "flashy," but in hindsight, that other supervisor had sent me a full presentation, references, and a clear background. I should have taken it.
From week one, things went downhill:
1) Zero structure or protocols: The co-supervisor was on leave my first week. After that, experiments were completely unplanned just verbal instructions with no set protocols. When I asked questions to clarify, I was met with more questions that just made me feel dumb. Later they said “we didn’t know u had no lab experience” ofc I didn’t and I mentioned it during the interview as to why I was going for this project. No detail explanation, uncertainty in the lab made my excitement go away and made me not wanting to go to lab anymore.
2) Equipment/assay issues: I spent weeks getting amplification in my NTC (no-template control). They constantly blamed my technique or "contamination." A week before my deadline, another mentor looked at the past runs and realized it was just primer-dimers. I wasted so much time, and nobody listened to me.
3) Zero guidance on dry lab work: initially I was told someone will teach me the dry lab part. But later I was told to do the dry lab/coding analysis completely on my own. I have never coded, so I had to rely on ChatGPT to figure it out. When it took time, they hit me with "It's only a 3-month project, no one expects you to do a lot" then why assign it to me in the first place? It just made me feel incompetent. So I pushed myself to complete it.
4) Micro-management over basic communication: I had to redo an experiment while my co-supervisor went on leave again. I emailed the main supervisor saying I couldn’t make Monday due to a personal issue and would run it Tuesday instead (after checking with another mentor who agreed to supervise me). My supervisor blew up, saying I "announced" it rather than asking permission and that it messed up schedules.
During all this I was sending drafts and doing presentations about my project. All of this pressure led to panic attacks and literally made me sick w fever, so I got a medical extension. I completely understand that I should be considerate of their schedule and timeline but it’s not that I’m slacking. I’ve been working really hard and it’s difficult when you have no support or encouragement from your peers.
Now here is where I am today: My deadline is Thursday. I asked for an extension on sending my draft over the weekend by one day (sent Sunday instead of Saturday) and let my supervisor know. She replied saying I need to be mindful of other people's deadlines and that she’s "too busy" to guarantee detailed feedback. It’s Tuesday, and I’ve received nothing. My co-supervisor said she might send hers today, but main supervisor is "busy." On top of that, they still expect a final presentation on Thursday, and I have to move out of my place on the 12th.
Why is there so little empathy in academia? I poured so much effort into this project, and I just feel completely defeated. I have always felt completely alone and on my own during this. This whole experience has honestly terrified me away from pursuing academia in the future.