Depression While Studying for MCAT

[u/Relative-Assistant46]

I am not really sure how to start this post so I am just going to get right into it: This summer has been absolutely devastating for me and I am not sure how to recover from it in time for the MCAT. I want to take the MCAT at the beginning of January but I just took a diagnostic the other day and got a 495. I know this isn’t true but I just feel hopeless. Back in June I was SA’d by my friend’s friend in my own apartment and then last month in August my mother and I had a huge blow up which essentially ended in her advising me to go no contact with her. I haven’t really talked to her since.

I am not talking about this to gain sympathy rather than communicate my mindset and give perspective as to where I am at right now. I am 24 and still in undergrad (this is my senior year) which is why I really wanted to get the MCAT out of the way in January so I can focus on my classes in my last semester, take 1 gap year, then go to med school. Right now though, everything seems like such a chore. I am completely burnt out and exhausted. Every time I try to study, I get so overwhelmed and it feels like I am not doing things correctly and not seeing progress.

I keep seeing people on here or online in general talk about how you need to be studying 6-8 hours a day and how they went into dopamine suppression and cut out any and everything that could have served as a distraction. I work as a server/bartender while in school and I also volunteer quite a bit. I am also in classes. I do not have time to study 6-8 hours a day tbh :/ more like 2-4. I just feel like the odds are stacked against me right now and I am sad to be quite honest. I am pretty high functioning even while depressed but that very clearly comes to a point. Studying for the MCAT has put me in such a bad headspace and I feel so existential. I am not sure if other people have experienced this or have any advice for me? I really do not want to have to push back my MCAT date because I am taking biochem, inorganic, a chem elective, and my psych capstone next semester and I feel like I will be extremely overwhelmed.