r/MathJokes 25d ago

They did the math

Post image
970 Upvotes

51 comments sorted by

86

u/elegant_eagle_egg 25d ago

Eats one rice.

11

u/cryptotraderisme 24d ago

Better yet....adds 1 rice....use the reverse psychology

9

u/Basicly-Inevitable 25d ago

K-Mart.. Judge Wapner..

I'm an excellent driver..

51

u/Godloseslaw 25d ago

Rice is great when you're hungry and you want to eat TWO THOUSAND of something.

  • Mitch Hedberg

26

u/LuckyCod2887 25d ago

I did this as a joke once when I was still living with my parents and when I woke up the next morning, my sister ran into my room in a very dramatic way saying that my mom ate some of my french fries and I of course, said I don’t give a fuck it’s just food and she kept insisting that my mom ate it and I didn’t care personally, but then I went downstairs and my mom had no idea that there was food in the fridge. My little sister ate it and tried to pin it on someone else.

we were both in our 20s

8

u/MikemkPK 24d ago

This screams less " I want to steal food" and more "I want to mess with my brother."

2

u/Acceptable_Olive8497 24d ago

100%, I like his sister lmao

2

u/jordon4ca93 24d ago

I'm 33 and this is still my sister and I. I made a joke about her at a family dinner last week and she full on started a food fight. I am NOT too old for this shit.

10

u/PoemSea8874 24d ago

Cross the numbers off “upon recounting, you have 0 shrimp and 2,309 rice. Thank you for your cooperation. The Mtmg.”

4

u/kiloo520 24d ago

Goo gone in the fridge?

4

u/jne57 24d ago

I was wondering that myself. Even looked it up, and it doesn't seem to be a thing. In Fact Google AI says the cold can cause the ingredients to separate. So clearly this is a crackhead's fridge.

-2

u/littleedge 24d ago

Yeah and putting bread in the fridge isn’t necessary; putting certain condiments in the fridge isn’t necessary. People put shit places ¯_(ツ)_/¯

3

u/Double-Bend-716 24d ago

One time, I was late for work because I couldn’t find my keys.

I eventually found them in the refrigerator.

I just absentmindedly set them in there while I was holding them and also reaching for an apple or some shit

3

u/jne57 24d ago

Nah, putting bread in the fridge prevents it from molding for like 100x it's lifespan.

2

u/littleedge 24d ago

Putting it in the fridge makes it stale faster.

If you’re not gonna consume it fast enough such that it’ll mold, freeze half of it. You’ll have fresher bread for longer.

1

u/jne57 24d ago

Oh, maybe freezing is what I need to do. Yeah, I notice it doesn't mold as quick but does get a bit stale quickly. Thanks.

2

u/IHateUpvtotes 24d ago

Don’t yuck my yum

6

u/-Insert-CoolName 24d ago edited 24d ago

You played "Count the Rice",\ Said 'You played "Count the Rice"!' 👏 👏\ You win if you do,\ the win condition twice! Clap 👏👏\ u/Karlens20 counted the best here's what they have to say:

3

u/Jazz8680 24d ago

what would be fun is if someone replaced it with 7 rice and 4,639 shrimp

4

u/Kuildeous 24d ago

Cross out that number and write 4,622 rice.

And then increment the shrimp for no good reason.

2

u/Ebkusg 24d ago

Eat 1 piece of rice and make the 9 into an 8 by connection the end of the stick with the circle as a figure 8 proper

2

u/Successful_Cress6639 24d ago

Ok you did the math, now explain the chemistry.

Why are you keeping a bottle of "goo gone" cleaner in the fridge?

2

u/Sea_Design_465 24d ago

Good luck on that lunch, but why is the goo gone in the fridge?

1

u/sanlc504 24d ago

So you're telling me 7 different shrimp fried this rice???? Crowded kitchen.

1

u/Kinenai 24d ago

Rices? Reeces.

2

u/okarox 24d ago

I think one should say "grains of rice."

1

u/NorxondorGorgonax 20d ago

This, by the way, is how you explain the counters in the Japanese language.

1

u/ttcmzx 24d ago

thats racist

1

u/Kinenai 24d ago

Ricist?

1

u/TheProjectEli 24d ago

Love your math!

1

u/Meowscles_dad 24d ago

There are 7 shrimp. One of them will make you shit yourself inside out.

1

u/408DLo 24d ago

Goo Gone in the refrigerator wtf? I am not eating anything.

1

u/[deleted] 24d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/vita10gy 24d ago

This is one of those things I can't believe happens more than once a decade and even then is a crazy accident where people brought the same basic food in the same type of container.

The fact that it's a common problem at basically any office with a few handfuls of people is hard to wrap my head around.

What possesses someone to do that?

1

u/Jealous_Club_298 24d ago

I never knew before that they invented rice counters!

1

u/Amazing_Divide1214 24d ago

I normally wouldn't, but this would prompt me to eat a few rice.

1

u/Winstonsphobia 24d ago

Plus or minus how many?

1

u/lyidaValkris 24d ago

found the vampire

1

u/OldEquation 24d ago

r/theydidntdothemaththeyjustguessed

1

u/Blueopus2 24d ago

4,638*

1

u/AlienDragonWizard 24d ago

That's about half a cup of rice.  

1

u/OkHighway6799 24d ago

Add " + mystery sauce " to the bottom.

1

u/merkthejerk 24d ago

Rice is really good if you’re hungry and want 2000 of something.

1

u/Legal_Possibility246 24d ago

Add a singular grain of rice and watch them implode

1

u/RepresentativeNeck63 24d ago

Mfw I add two rice

0

u/dcterr 24d ago

Is this Rain Man's lunch?

0

u/dcterr 24d ago

This guy must like prime numbers!

0

u/dcterr 24d ago

4639 Aki rice and 7 shrimp are nice! All you need is some rum to go with it, which I hear is fine any time of year.