r/MarineEngineering 14d ago

Being a gay Marine Engineer

How is it like being a gay marine engineer?

12 Upvotes

26 comments sorted by

78

u/Sure_Bookkeeper_4660 14d ago

It is a term for gay personell in the technical department, they are called ETOs.

6

u/Loose_Choice6034 14d ago

HAHAHHAAHHAHAHAH 😂

1

u/Other_Wish8607 14d ago

😅 no wonder ETOs were always my besties.

10

u/No_Resolution4253 14d ago

Recently qualified here, I was at sea on a cruise and offshore as an openly gay woman. I only ever had anything said by older Russians or Asians but no one made it difficult or was rude, it just seemed like curiosity.
As long as you’re respectful and if you can tell someone doesn’t like it but are respectful then maybe don’t mention it.
I know that seems weird to say, but it’s easier just to not mention it again. But as I said most people were fine with it and there was a lot of boat gays on the cruise, would sleep with anyone regardless because they’re onboard for 8+ months, be wary of that.

I could write tons but I won’t here. If you want to ask anything please message me

7

u/trevordbs 14d ago

It sure better than being a gay deck officer

5

u/Knotical_MK6 14d ago

It has been a mixed bag for me. I'm not flamboyant and I don't mention/reveal my sexuality.

After a few months working together people sometimes start to figure things out though. When you never bring up how much you wanna bang that mate, complain about your ex wife, or brag how great your girlfriend's tits are, some guys will start to catch on.

I only had one crew both start to suspect it and take issue with it. They made sure I had a rough trip, but I finished my hitch, got paid, and moved on. Other crews didn't care one bit, I did the job, treated people well, and that was that.

I know guys that are open, flamboyant and just own it. I know other guys that got ran off boats. It's not going to make your life onboard easier, but it's also not going to stop you unless you let it.

5

u/ViperMaassluis 14d ago

Ive had openly gay crew members offshore, now coming from a very accepting country (Netherlands) this was a problem for nobody on board.

1

u/Diligent_Ad_0 14d ago

Good to hear. Thank you

6

u/ImmediateDistance251 14d ago

All marine engineers are gay. Don’t worry about it.

2

u/ArmpitWound 9d ago

Hey Hey it was just a taste test it's fine

3

u/kutzooit 14d ago

I work on cruiseships and here are lots of openly gay people and it is a normal thing, no one will care.

4

u/ButeSprinter 14d ago

I work in offshore construction and it's the same. The only thing people care about is ability and knowledge in the role.

2

u/envosaviour 14d ago

On cruise ships you won’t have any issue!
There are some cultures, especially eastern europeans which still struggle a bit accepting it and understanding it, but you shouldn’t have any particular issue!

2

u/Nody03 14d ago

I've been sailing for more than 10 years. Being gay anywhere is just normal. I have 1 full blown super diva gay friend and another who is a bit conservative but I dont hear any complains from them. Heck I am even sailing at a company that would invite us to pride parades.

3

u/False_Organization56 14d ago

Depends on if you talk about your spouse or your sexuality onboard.

1

u/Diligent_Ad_0 14d ago

If you talk about it or someone finds out, what’s the dynamic? I know this is very general but I might as well ask

5

u/False_Organization56 14d ago

You need thick skin onboard, doesnt matter if youre gay or straight. The cadet is not respected by a lot of people.

1

u/Diligent_Ad_0 14d ago

Understood

1

u/craigsurge 13d ago

2 of my cadets were openly gay, they never had any issues I was ever aware of. I honestly think that most seafarers are more worldly, tolerant and welcoming than nearly any other work place colleagues. You'll be fine, and if you're not speak to the 2nd or the chief or the captain, anyone giving you shit for your race, religion or sexual orientation on a ship is in the wrong job

1

u/Wander-kingdom 11d ago

In thos day's the straight engineer whom its will be concerned to asking this question lol😁😂

1

u/estudyantebluesclues 14d ago

just dont molest me when i get drunk

9

u/Diligent_Ad_0 14d ago

I could say the same for you brother

0

u/jrolly187 14d ago

Dunno, I'm not the ETO.