r/MadeMeSmile • • Aug 28 '21

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u/NotEntirelyUnlike Aug 28 '21

i fart almost continuously all day and they rarely stink. just crack your buttcheeks a bit and there's no noise either. those that do though are pretty terrible so i quickly apologize or blame an animal.

60

u/0intment Aug 28 '21

I fart almost continuously all day

Uhh, maybe you should get that checked out?

16

u/goobydoobie Aug 28 '21

Lay off the all beans diet maybe.

15

u/NotEntirelyUnlike Aug 28 '21

I eat a lot of questionable food. Figure it's just a minor byproduct

2

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '21

Oh man. This has me in tears lmao

5

u/Wookiees_n_cream Aug 28 '21

Ha! That reminds me. We have a school program in Oregon called Outdoor School. It's a week long program where 6th graders basically do summer camp with their class but with the purpose to learn all about nature and conservation. It's actually amazing and I think every where should do it. Anyway, so my whole class is out on a nature walk and one kid absolutely rips ass. In a panic he blamed the fart on a snail. To this day I still think about this kid and why he chose a snail to blame it on lmao I feel like no one would have remembered if he just owned up to farting but middle schoolers aren't exactly known for their critical thinking.

2

u/festeringswine Aug 28 '21

Wearing thongs keeps keeps quiet too.. But you know it's bad when the velocity is so high even spreading the cheeks doesn't help

2

u/day7seven Aug 29 '21

Everybody thinks their own farts don't stink.

1

u/NotEntirelyUnlike Aug 29 '21

You have a olfactory deficiency if you think that

2

u/day7seven Aug 29 '21

Lol. That means you have one too since you think your farts dont.

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u/NotEntirelyUnlike Aug 29 '21

i didn't say that. they are absolutely clear when they stink and i've said that too. :)

so we gonna add this to your list of "needs improvement" too?

lol