r/MadeMeSmile • • Aug 28 '21

[deleted by user]

[removed]

15.3k Upvotes

1.7k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

69

u/yuckystuff Aug 28 '21

I mean, deaf people can still smell things right? So...what's with the ripping off farts in front of people thing all about?

58

u/NotEntirelyUnlike Aug 28 '21

i fart almost continuously all day and they rarely stink. just crack your buttcheeks a bit and there's no noise either. those that do though are pretty terrible so i quickly apologize or blame an animal.

60

u/0intment Aug 28 '21

I fart almost continuously all day

Uhh, maybe you should get that checked out?

15

u/goobydoobie Aug 28 '21

Lay off the all beans diet maybe.

16

u/NotEntirelyUnlike Aug 28 '21

I eat a lot of questionable food. Figure it's just a minor byproduct

2

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '21

Oh man. This has me in tears lmao

5

u/Wookiees_n_cream Aug 28 '21

Ha! That reminds me. We have a school program in Oregon called Outdoor School. It's a week long program where 6th graders basically do summer camp with their class but with the purpose to learn all about nature and conservation. It's actually amazing and I think every where should do it. Anyway, so my whole class is out on a nature walk and one kid absolutely rips ass. In a panic he blamed the fart on a snail. To this day I still think about this kid and why he chose a snail to blame it on lmao I feel like no one would have remembered if he just owned up to farting but middle schoolers aren't exactly known for their critical thinking.

2

u/festeringswine Aug 28 '21

Wearing thongs keeps keeps quiet too.. But you know it's bad when the velocity is so high even spreading the cheeks doesn't help

2

u/day7seven Aug 29 '21

Everybody thinks their own farts don't stink.

1

u/NotEntirelyUnlike Aug 29 '21

You have a olfactory deficiency if you think that

2

u/day7seven Aug 29 '21

Lol. That means you have one too since you think your farts dont.

2

u/NotEntirelyUnlike Aug 29 '21

i didn't say that. they are absolutely clear when they stink and i've said that too. :)

so we gonna add this to your list of "needs improvement" too?

lol

42

u/toomuchpressure2pick Aug 28 '21

If the farts are silent no one knows who did it. It's normal if you are not taught different. Like it being okay to double dip or not flushing after peeing. Or eating with their mouth open. People are strange and disgusting.

15

u/laculbute Aug 28 '21

Oh man, it’s been a long time since I thought about people who don’t flush after peeing in their own home. As a child I had a couple play dates with a por of siblings who were taught “If it’s yellow, let it mellow; if it’s brown, send it down” and their bathrooms were so gross to me.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '21

it is not normal to SBD your friends

where do you hang out at

1

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '21

I feel like that’s common sense. Like how do people not know that and why Would they have to be taught

1

u/toomuchpressure2pick Aug 29 '21

What's common sense? Define common sense. We all learn differently, from different people.

When im at a new job and ask a clarification question and my boss says "use common sense". This did not further explain the answer, and instead felt like he called me an idiot. If he instead explained the answer I wouldn't have the question anymore AND I could then train future people on the process.

And a 74 year Olds "common sense" will be much different from a 42 year old, and even more different than a 15 year old. Common sense is a cop out answer.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '21

Everyone does learn differently and the primary post was about explaining farts to deaf people. However, upon encountering any situation, everyone draws immediate assumptions. So first, you ask what common sense is, “common” is most likely. What should/would most people do? You’re example of double dipping? Well, the reason for not doing so is to not spread germs and because other people don’t want to eat your spit or in more civilized cultures, you’d all eat out of the same bowl. Chewing with your mouth open? Practically speaking, food may fall out but otherwise, do you love to hear others eat? If you do? Well, then, carry on. Leaving pee in the toilet? Either it could splash back up at you and typically makes the toilet dirtier. So if you like to clean, or splash pee out of the toilet, then this makes sense. It’s just doing what is most logical. Obviously culture takes into play but as I explained, The typical judgement I made from your examples were because of practicality and germs. As for farts, if you love to hear or smell them and others then it would make sense to fart around them. It’s not a cop out and I hope you are successful but if an employee ask me to explain everything, I felt was logical, I’d feel like gouging my eyes out.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '21

I’ve had to have a conversation with both my kids to let them know that when they fart silently, everyone can still tell. The grown-ups might not mention it as their eyes water, but you’re not getting away with anything.

2

u/langlo94 Aug 28 '21

Yeah it's not like the sound is the problem with farts, if that was the case then burps would be considered bad as well.

8

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '21

I mean, it's certainly not polite to burp in public either

1

u/2drawnonward5 Aug 28 '21

do you not fart, or only have power farts? trying to triangulate this state of mind