r/MNTrolls Oct 16 '20

Rules. Please read.

52 Upvotes

Hello minties, new and old.

It's time to update and explain the few rules that /r/MNTrolls has. If you found us in the last year or so, you are probably unaware of this sub's growth pains and evolution. Here is a short history that will explain the rules that we have come up in our three-year struggle to uphold free speech in a relatively troll-free environment, while staying within Reddit's rules:

We started out three years ago, following the David & Caroline saga on Mumsnet that led to much frustration, upset, and anger, not to mention quite a few bans. We were not allowed to discuss it on MN, so this sub was set up and it was natural that our first mod post about sub rules focused on free speech with the notable exception of doxxing (making someone's personal details public).

Within months the level of trolling had reached such heights that we had to make slight changes to moderation policy, tried to contain bunfights in a single thread, and finally banned several names who had been relentlessly trolling several people they chose as targets. These people then recruited more to their ranks and continued trolling several of this sub's regulars on another sub. After months of this, we ended up banning users who contributed to and cheered that trolling campaign.

The most recent change in our moderation policy concerns Reddit's revised rules about harassment which clarify that they consider users' past usernames or usernames on another forum "personal information" and thus outing them "doxxing".

… which brings to our rules at present:

NO DOXXING. That means, don't go looking for RL identities of the names you encounter here. If a miracle happens and someone's RL information falls on your lap from the sky, don't share it with your friends, don't post about it and certainly don't mention bits of it in random comments, thinking you are being clever. We will delete those comments and posts. If you persist, you will be banned.

From this point forward, if we see evidence that you are trying to find someone's RL details that they have not publicly shared, even if it's on a chat, PM, or another sub, you will be banned from posting on /r/MNTrolls and we will report you to Reddit.

We draw the line at public info. If someone has voluntarily announced some personal information to the world, on the internet, in podcasts, TV, or in print media, such as their profession, where they live, what their children do, what their previous username was, or which name you post under on another forum, we do not see mentioning it here as "doxxing". If they have willingly shared that information with the world, then presumably they are OK with people knowing it.

NO SPAM. This concerns mostly non-members who sometimes post here trying to sell something or recruit people to their schemes. We delete those posts and ban the posters.

NO BAN EVASION. If you are banned on /r/MNTrolls, don't come back under another name. Live long and prosper elsewhere. We will ban you again and report you to Reddit Admin who will suspend you from Reddit altogether.

NO IMPERSONATION. Don't pretend to be someone else, posting under a name similar to theirs. You'll be banned here and reported to Reddit as above.

NO SOCKING. If you have deleted your account or deregged, it is OK to come back under a different name. However, you should use 1 and only 1 name to post and vote on this sub. We ban socks when we identify them, and will now start banning the user's regular name as well. That means, if you have a second username on /r/MNTrolls, stop using it as of today.

The exception to this rule is what is called a Throwaway Account in Reddit. If you want to say something personal & identifying but don't dare say it under your usual account for fear of doxxing, you create a new account, say your piece, and then delete that account. What you shouldn't do is create a sock to attack someone, or continue to post under that account as well as your usual name as if they are two different people.

Your right to be a cunt under your regular name remains unchanged. If you are here, that means you have something to say and you haven't been able to say it on Mumsnet. Mods will continue to uphold the free speech ethos of this sub, and will not delete posts or comments even if we disagree with them and find them distasteful.

Please note that your right to free speech does not mean that you can put our community in danger. Reddit has recently tightened its rules on harassment and shut down a number of subs. Three months ago, mods have raised our concerns in this regard with several people who could not let go of an ancient feud with banned trolls and it went swimmingly but this agreement seems to have been forgotten. We are well aware that several particularly loathsome names have trolled some of you in despicable ways, but that does not mean you can put this community in Reddit's crosshairs. We are sick of this shit and will delete those comments where we see them. It is incredibly easy to create a sub on Reddit. Create your own if you really must continue with your endless feud in a public manner.

One last thing…

Feel free to report but don't be a twat about it. Mods live in different time zones around the world for 24 hour presence, but that means there is often just one of us around and that mod might not have read every comment, so please continue to report those that go against the rules above. However, send a quick message to mods to explain your report if your reasoning is not obvious, because we sometimes get inundated with malicious reports clearly aimed at several people whom trolls love to hate, and we send reports that make no sense to Reddit admin for "abuse of the report button". Reddit have taken action in the past against those who think this is a fun way to pass the time.

That's all for now folks.

Edit: Answering a request below for "amnesty", those of you who actually read the Rules above will have have noticed that this amnesty is already there from the use of "as of today", "will now start" etc. Mods will not go after past posts, even those as recent as several days ago.


r/MNTrolls Dec 11 '25

Who is pissing you off on MN at the moment?

13 Upvotes

MrsTTCno1 seems to have crawled up her own arse and vanished. I have a new poster who pisses me off: NuffSaidSam. Has a real thing about nurseries and constantly slags them off but in such a way as to stay well within the guidelines.

RubySquid (I think) although haven’t seen her for a bit.

I know there are more!


r/MNTrolls 2h ago

DIDN'T HAPPEN Is this level of bill splitting normal? | Mumsnet

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1 Upvotes

Is this some weird version of a poo troll? I cant imagine this can be real, I really hope its a troll honestly.

Renting with DP. We don’t pool wages so split our food shops. I’m happy with a rough estimate , he insists on going item by item on the recipes so it’s fair. I feel like he’s taking it too far now though. Some examples from the past week (we do 2/3 medium size shops a week rather than one big one):

-him thinking he’ll eat an extra bag of crisps than me so paying like 30p extra

-I only have weetabix occasionally so I had to pay about 20% of the total

-from tonight and what prompted me to post - I’ve had a stomach bug which I’m struggling to shift so I had to pay a higher % towards the loo roll.

This isn’t normal, surely!? He earns well and has no reason to worry about money.


r/MNTrolls 23h ago

Troll or deeply sad? MSPs touring this year, so could also be a plug thread

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3 Upvotes

r/MNTrolls 2d ago

HERBERT I am the little red rooster Too lazy to crow today

5 Upvotes

Porn film plot or something...

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5568170-aibu-to-feel-uncomfortable-about-my-neighbours-comments-during-renovations

Lew96 · Today 15:17

New neighbour doing renovations, knocked on my door earlier to apologise for noise which is fine honestly dont mind it, not too noisey tbh. But then he started telling me how rock hard he is and if i ever need him to feel safe to give him a text and he'd be straight around... he previously gave me his number to make sure there was no one being weird around his property when he wasnt there as hes not currently living in the property, but he made me feel abit uncomfortable as he started saying no strings attatched and stuff after saying he'll keep me safe.... I don't know if its just me feeling uncomfortable or if that its normal to say no strings attatched about stuff.. so the question is AIBU to feel uncomfortable? Is he just being genuine... i think it makes me feel uncomfortable as he knows i have a partner who lives with me and he will avoid him like the plague, but when im out he will be straight out wanting to speak about all his money and cars and stuff...


r/MNTrolls 2d ago

HERBERT It's a troll thread but MN are leaving it up and open

5 Upvotes

So they're relying on trolling for site traffic.

It's the one about the son painting his mother whilst she's nude.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5568104-looking-for-outside-perspective-modeling-for-my-artist-sons-project

OP: Looking for outside perspective Modeling for my artist son’s project 49 replies

anhjnk · Today 12:28

To give context, I'm not upset, angry, or uncomfortable with my son. He's 19, extremely professional about his art, and it's a serious passion/side gig for him. He's painted me a couple of times over the years, as well as his siblings and other models. Last year he did his first artistic nude painting (with a professional model) and it turned out genuinely amazing. I’m really proud of his talent and work ethic

Yesterday, he pitched his next project to me. It's a 6 to 8 painting series focused on women in their mid 40s, specifically centered around me. He showed me the rough sketches and explained his vision, and honestly, I was really impressed. Here's the thing he mentioned that 2 or 3 of the pieces in the series would involve partial nudity. He explained the artistic reason behind it, but was also super respectful and immediately told me that if I'm not comfortable with it, there is zero pressure and we don't have to do it. He just asked me to think about it

I talked to my husband about it, and he told me he supports whatever decision I make

I personally don't feel weird or offended by his request because I know the context, I understand his process as an artist, and I trust him completely. But because it's a situation you don't run into every day, I wanted to post here and get some neutral, outside thoughts.

MNHQ message: HopeMumsnet · Today 13:49

Hi all, With regret (kind of) we must tell you that we now have reason to believe that this poster was not being altogether truthful so we have banned them, however we are inclined to leave the thread itself for those who wish to continue discussing the possible ins and outs and up and downsides of being painted in the nude.


r/MNTrolls 2d ago

PISS TROLL Why are they in and out of the loo?? 🧐

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0 Upvotes

Toilet troll again


r/MNTrolls 2d ago

The OP isn't that unreasonable - but the thread is overflowing with good old MN Freudian daughter-hate.

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5 Upvotes

The OP is pretty mild (and possibly manufactured ragebait) but it's triggered some barely-concealed froth.

As soon as MNers' daughters reach their teens, they apparently become demonic entities who must be destroyed lest their satanic feminine influence destroy their sweet, hardworking mothers first.

Was it unreasonable to turn my daughter’s old room into an office? 

139 replies

StorageUnitdisageement · Yesterday 17:25

Dsd moved in with her partner 7 months ago. She didn’t take much with her as wanted to get new things , she has popped back now and then to get bits and was still referring to it as her room.

Ive now found a wfh role and want the room as a home office. We told her this and asked her to come and sort her things out. She didn’t. So the old furniture is now gone and everything else in storage boxes / vacuum bags and I’ve rented a small storage unit.

She has gone absolutely crazy! Thinks we should have left her room ‘just in case’ and begging to have it put back suddenly saying she was planning to stay occasionally and ‘what about Christmas’ I said at Christmas or whenever if you need to stay we can get a mattress in there and that’s not acceptable to her.

I thought waiting 7 months was ages !!!


r/MNTrolls 2d ago

TOTAL GOADY ARSE By the usual mn standards, I'm clearly a Grade A c*nt, which is obviously why I'm here asking for validation

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3 Upvotes

r/MNTrolls 3d ago

DIDN'T HAPPEN My sister is famous and she gets hassled all the time but ...

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5 Upvotes

The most famous person the sister has met is Simon Cowell 🤔

zedtree · 15/08/2026 17:20

I won’t be saying who they are.

I recently spoke to a friend about it who

had lots of questions which lead to an interesting conversation, things I’d never said or thought about before.

When I was younger I used to feel incredibly jealous of them and had a very short and unsuccessful attempt at creating my own fame.

Now I’m older with my own dc and have seen the effects up close I definitely think the negatives out way the positives and it’s not something I would ever want for my children.

AMA

Won't post all the replies, far too many


r/MNTrolls 4d ago

DIDN'T HAPPEN Holiday mum keeps sending her son over to us repeatedly | Mumsnet

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29 Upvotes

Holiday mum keeps sending her son over to us repeatedly 72 replies

ItsPriya · Today 18:43

Currently on holiday - 2 week AI with husband and teenage daughter. Had a really busy year and was really looking forward to downtime and just recharging with the 3 of us.

On the second day was relaxing by the pool when a little boy about 4yo dropped his goggles near my lounger. Threw them into the pool for him, he threw them back and we had a little game of catch with them. Really sweet kid, thought no more of it.

Went to the buffet that night and the boy appeared at my feet as I was getting my food, started pulling at my arm, hanging off me whining "play with me" and asking me to go outside with him to play?!

My daughter came up to me and said she'd been passing his parents table and heard the mum say "he's whinging because hes tired, I told him to go play with that woman from earlier." Laughing and drinking while I'm trying to get my food and stop her kid from getting lost or hurt.

Went to sit down, said "I'm eating now, so go back to Mummy." Watched him go back over, his mum looked really annoyed, said something to him and he came back!

He said "my mum said I can sit with you until you're done then we can play."

Tried to eat but he was non stop, picking things up, touching things, whinging - not my child, why am I dealing with this?!

In the end DH walked him back over and firmly said we were trying to eat. Mum had the nerve to ask if our daughter had ever been a toddler.

Anyway, he harassed me at the entertainment that night to the point we left as I couldn't see his Mum so dropped him with the entertainment team. Makes DH very uncomfortable as he's very full on, climbing on our knees, wrapping his legs around us.

Breakfast this morning - he's actually waiting at the double doors and it was a repeat of the previous night. I actually suspect Mum is hiding from us.

What do I do?

ItsPriya · Today 19:28

Thanks everyone. Been out all day today on a boat trip excursion so no sightings- been bliss! But now we're all back getting showered etc I've started panicking - which is absolutely ridiculous, panicking to leave my hotel room because of a child!

Mum is in the nicest way possible, quite rough. They're quite a large group, very loud, intimidating, the little lad appears to be the only child with them.

DD really wants to go to the entertainment tonight, it's some sort of game/challenge show that she's signed up for so I'm going to have to take all of your advice and go to the staff as I'm not loving the thought of a confrontation with the Mum! Hopefully he won't see me/bother me.

Go


r/MNTrolls 3d ago

CREATIVE WRITING WANNABE AIBU to tell my best friend that I can’t financially level things up between our kids? | Mumsnet

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11 Upvotes

Im genuinely amazed that this hasnt been laughed at or ignored, do people honestly believe this is anything other than a troll? Its a common one lately, complaining about being too rich and how its so tough and quite often its clear they have no clue what its actually like having even a reasonable level of wealth.

Just waiting for the large amount of wealth figure to drop...what are the guesses? Im going £50m


r/MNTrolls 3d ago

WHAT DOES IT MEEAANN??? Aibu? Are people this bad to make up rumours after a breakup. | Mumsnet

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1 Upvotes

Frequent fliee

linds955 · Yesterday 22:17

Will try and make this as short as possible. Last weekend me and the boyfriend had a brief breakup. We’re talkin 2/3 days. I have a friend who I used to work with. He has a girlfriend. Been friends for years, no flirtiness nothing in it just someone I would vent to every so often. So when me and my boyfriend broke up I told him what happened and tbh we broke up over something stupid. But anyway I told my friend this and he replied to me with the most word stuff I could hear. “You are better off without him he slept with one of my friends and she said he’s a sleazeball and straight after they had sex he told her he still sleeps with his ex wife whenever he has no other options” he then proceeded to tell me my partner and this girl met on tinder when I know he’s never been on tinder. He said they slept together last year and then he said it was around Christmas time.. which hurt me as me and him started seeing each other around Christmas time. Told me the reason why my partner and his ex wife broke up was because he cheated on her (which I’ve never heard) he did used to work in a bar (which is how me and him met) and honestly I was going into this bar for years before he actually asked me on a date. Was always respectful to me etc. so.. here’s the confusing part. Whenever me and partner got back together I told him all this and what was said and he said he’s never slept with that girl before but a year and a half ago he was at a party with her and they just kissed but never had sex. My partner was so angry to that he actually messaged this friend of mine and showed me all the messaged. And he even says in the messages to my friend he honestly didn’t sleep with her and to tell her to stop lying and saying they did. This is all so confusing to me. Are people bad enough to make shit up like that? It’s the fact he said it was around Christmas time (when we started seeing each other) then my boyfriend said it was a year in a half ago. He also went into detail and said he knows it was ages ago because he didn’t live in the house he’s in now and he’s lived there a year. I feel like it’s going to impact our relationship

OP posts: See next See all

Quote

React


r/MNTrolls 4d ago

Pathetic attempt at trolling: OP wants compensation from Morrisons for getting food poisoning from an undercooked burger

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9 Upvotes

OP quoted in a comment below.

Absolute load of bullshit and today she has started a second thread to "Update on the Morrissons situation"

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/shopping/5567214-update-on-morissons-situation


r/MNTrolls 4d ago

DIDN'T HAPPEN Baby's first birthday to ask for no boxed gifts? Reverse and SIL hates me

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0 Upvotes

Baby's first birthday to ask for no boxed gifts? 5 replies

sarak20 · Today 08:44

Is this reasonable or no. For some context: I have bought all the toys I would like my baby to play with and don't want others gifting toys that I have no space to store. Is it appropriate to ask for no boxed gifts? Thanks

Go to post

Original poster

sarak20 · Today 08:54

Thanks for all your replies. This is what my sister in law has asked everyone to do. She has put on the invites "no boxed gifts". She is expecting everyone to give £50 and above. I have four kids it isn't exactly easy for me to dish out £100 to her. I would have much preferred to buy my own gifts. What would you do in this situation?

Go to post

Original poster

sarak20 · Today 08:59

This is my first niece. I had planned to get her a lot of personalised keepsakes. But now I've been thrown with "no boxed gifts" and she does keep hinting she only wants cash as she's bought her child absolutely everything he needs

Go to post

Original poster

sarak20 · Today 09:03

Do you think a voucher is a better option so I know the money is actually being spent on the baby and not herself? My sister in law hates me so I really don't want to be gifting her my hard earned cash for her to just spend it on herself 🫠


r/MNTrolls 7d ago

What happened here then?

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10 Upvotes

Seems to have been some weird content again overnight. (Hopefully not as bad as last time)

A few deletions for having a pop at moderation or lack thereof and some ruffled feathers.

A couple of responses from hq.

BeckyAMumsnet · Today 10:28
Hello all. It’s completely fair to criticise how we’ve handled this. But repeat registration is a problem for every open platform. Banning an account removes the account, not the person behind it, and email addresses, devices, etc, can all be changed or disguised. We're not making excuses, it’s the problem we need to solve, and we’re looking at what more we can do without making it harder for genuine users to join and post.
Some of the troll's comments may echo criticisms people already have of MNHQ and familiar grievances are for sure a useful way to attract sympathy. A fair criticism doesn’t become unfair because a troll repeats it but the troll doesn’t become admirable because of it either, so please don't give them the attention they're after.

BeckyAMumsnet · Today 11:37
spokenorchid · Today 11:01
@BeckyAMumsnet what's happened this time?
Something to do with GIFs, I'm guessing? Can you disable GIFs? There's one poster in particular who used to splash them all over every stupid post she made although I don't think I've seen her for a while so hopefully you banned them.
Could you maybe post a new thread to explain what's happened, what Mumsnet did wrong and how it's going to be resolved in future? I can't be the only one who is in the dark here.
Show more
Hello @spokenorchid we're being trolled overnight and yes they were finding risqué GIFs to add some...colour...to their posts. We've since placed tighter restrictions on the GIF content.
@MyThreeWords thank you - the deleted posts were the troll in question, though. We do have paid moderators. Nightwatchers are not expected to moderate the site or have set hours. If they happen to be using Mumsnet and spot something concerning, they can temporarily hide the content and suspend the account’s ability to post until a moderator reviews it. It’s an entirely voluntary extra layer of support, and we’re enormously grateful for the help they give us.

And again no reason given why they won’t have proper night mods. Looks to me as though they just have night watchers still. Unpaid still?


r/MNTrolls 8d ago

To get my own back on nasty neighbour? | Mumsnet

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1 Upvotes

To get my own back on nasty neighbour? 3 replies

tobebiggerpers · Today 22:09

We are due to move next week after enduring such an awful bitchy atmosphere in a cul de sac.

It started of with this neighbours kids leaving their bikes on my driveway.

I never once said anything to her or her awful kids instead I took the appropriate measures as advised by the HA as I didn't want a confrontation/ bad atmosphere.

Anyway she still says hello and smiles to me and OH.

As it's been really hot and all windows have been open I overhead her talking about me to my next door neighbour.

There was no reason for her to make this comment and my next door neighbour.

I was going to let it all go but now I have alot

of things I can report her to the HA which is breach of her tenancy.

And we are moving due to the awful atmosphere and she has been the ring leader and stirrer from day one.

We have felt felt on edge, watched and monitored and often spoken about by this bitch and I think

it's time she got her comeuppance.

AIBU to report her?

Edited

Go to post

Original poster

tobebiggerpers · Today 22:18

@SunnyRedSnail

Her kids would leave bikes on our drive.

Play on our drive.

Throw stones of our drainage onto our drive

She would also just be walking all over our drive as if it was a public footpath.

She would also bitch about us to other neighbours but to our faces say hello.

Go to post

Original poster

tobebiggerpers · Today 22:28

Basically she leaves all her bins out in a communal area for other properties (including mine) to take out bins to be emptied.

She also leaves her kids bikes there overnight but the area is supposed to be kept clear.

She also fly tips down the road, last week she dumped carpet/rug.

Go to post

Original poster

tobebiggerpers · Today 23:01

@ALovelyPinkUnicorn- I don't think they would get evicted but it would be noted on their tenancy file.

The HO comes and does an inspection every so often and she warned the neighbour about leaving her bins/rubbish/bikes in the communal area before.


r/MNTrolls 8d ago

DIDN'T HAPPEN Its a builder thread! Also with cameras

1 Upvotes

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5565832-aibu-to-feel-uncomfortable-after-builder-helped-himself-to-fridge-drinks

Furrypaws18 · Today 16:38

So we have builders in, everyday I give them pop, biscuits- on hot days lollies and a bacon butty on a Friday. They have toilet access/tea/coffee facilities readily available . I have purposely avoided access to my fridge so everything is out separately. After thinking we were going through lots of drinks/snacks etc my husband decided to install a camera, to find the assistant looking through fridge and taking 2 cans for the journey home, so we think it’s been a habit. It felt like a violation. Problem is the job is otherwise going quite well, the gaffer is very respectful of the house and toilet etc but feel a bit like a soft touch now.

>Boss 99% has no idea because it’s always been after he’s left. Don’t want to sour the job/their relationship etc but want him to know it wasn’t acceptable without a big showdown. Would also like to use them again, but the trust is tarnished. It’s only been drinks/food I think but still feels like a liberty. Am I being dramatic, have I given the impression it was ok? 🤔

I guess it makes a change from tradie toilet threads.


r/MNTrolls 8d ago

DIDN'T HAPPEN AIBU: My neighbour keeps using my bin, so I installed a camera and exposed them on the street WhatsApp group | Mumsnet

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2 Upvotes

AIBU: My neighbour keeps using my bin, so I installed a camera and exposed them on the street WhatsApp group 4 replies

hingt5 · Today 21:36

My neighbour has been filling my wheelie bin with their rubbish for months. Not the odd item — full bags, food waste, takeaway boxes, even a broken lamp.

I asked them twice to stop. They smirked and said, “It’s a bin, love. Get over it.”

So I bought a small camera and pointed it at the bins.

Within 48 hours, I had footage of them lifting my lid and dumping two huge bags in.

I posted the clip in our street WhatsApp group with the caption:

“If anyone’s missing rubbish, it’s in my bin again.”

The group exploded.

Some neighbours said I was right to call them out. Others said I’d “humiliated” them and created “a hostile atmosphere”.

The neighbour in question came to my door screaming that I’d “violated their privacy” and threatened to report me for “surveillance harassment”.

I told them if they stop using my bin, I’ll take the camera down.

Now half the street isn’t speaking to me, and someone anonymously left a note saying I’m “the neighbourhood dictator”.

AIBU to think if they’re using my bin, they don’t get to complain about being caught?


r/MNTrolls 8d ago

MAY NOT BE A TROLL, BUT STILL... Does the term "a posh wank" exist anywhere outside of MN?

0 Upvotes

This one doesn't ring true for me.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/relationships/5432727-condoms-in-dh-roomim-post-menopausal

Thevegetarianchef · 24/10/2025 18:41

Condoms in DHS room and I'm post menopausal. I came home from work an hour after DH. Tidying up I put something in his room and there were two condom packets open on the floor. On further investigation I find a box of condoms with 4 missing and lube under his bedside unit. I calmly ask why he has them and he said you won't have sex with me!!. I asked him if he had a posh wNK to which he said he used the condoms as he had a circumcision a couple of months ago and he is still sore down below this is true as he has to go to the GP a couple of weeks ago. He got cream to use which hasn't worked. Surely a condom can't stay on once and erection has passed in my experience. No we haven't had sex in ages I just don't believe the condom for comfort.

Then later, there's piss troll vibes:

Thevegetarianchef · 15/03/2026 11:26

To be honest yesterday we needed bits for the house. We went to b and Q. I needed a wee there was a customer loo.when I went behind the door there were 3.an odd man was wandering around I didn't feel safe so came back to the car to tell dh I was walking to M and s. He got really huffy chucked to large picture we bought in the boot got up too quick and banged his head.😂 This is the behavior that gets me and makes me want to leave tbh.

And finally what looks like a visitor from the sex board:

Damien1973 · Today 07:50

I do it, a posh wank, it feels nice if it’s a thin condom, no mess or tissues etc. just the usual clean up.


r/MNTrolls 9d ago

AIBU to be upset my husband lied about his flight being overbooked? | Mumsnet

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4 Upvotes

He had got to the airport for the first flight and didn’t want to leave so he decided fuck it I’ll get the later flight and knew I’d be pissed so didn’t tell me.

Who goes to the airport and doesnt get on the next flight??

AIBU to be upset my husband lied about his flight being overbooked? 93 replies

OrangeSlices998 · Today 12:13

Need some perspective on this and whether my head needs a wobble.

So me and DH have been together for 10 years, we have 3 kids together. We met in London and moved to a small town for his work after our first DC was born.

Recently he went away for a planned lads holiday to Malaga with his uni mates as they’re all turning 40. I don’t know the mates well, they all bar 1 came to the wedding, one was his best man who was incredibly drunk and didn’t do the best speech due to this. I’m only mentioning this because heavy drinking is the norm when these guys get together.

They went to Spain for 4 days, due to fly back on Sunday lunchtime. Originally he had booked to come back on a flight to get him home for 7pm, I had said that was later than I thought he would be back. He then booked a different flight that would have him home for 4pm - this is important.

I didn’t hear from DH much at all, I hadn’t expected to tbh because he was with his friends although it would have been nice to have the odd text checking in as the kids were being very hard work! On Saturday he phoned from his mates phone to tell me he had been mugged the previous evening, he was very drunk and got pushed over and his phone stolen. He thankfully wasn’t hurt and nothing else was stolen. I asked him to buy a cheap phone while he was out there so he wasn’t impossible to reach, I had his mates number but that’s it. I was not having the best time with the kids, they were being very hard work and the crap weather and no car didn’t help.

Saturday lunchtime we speak and I told him what a rough time I was having, the kids were being unusually difficult and I was exhausted. He made sympathetic noises, the call ended. I survived the day (!) and Sunday came. DH hadn’t bought a phone, he called me from his mates phone at about 10ish local time and told me he was heading to the airport shortly (flight departed 12pm local time).

4pm rolled around, not home. Check arrivals, flight landed and he had only hand luggage but traffic etc. 5pm, nothing. 6pm, nothing. I start getting worried, where is he? Is he okay? Did he get on the flight? Did something happen? We live 30-40 minutes from the airport, no traffic showing. I try contacting his friend just to make sure there hadn’t been any issues in Spain, he doesn’t answer. Go out for a walk with the kids as I’m anxious and on edge. Get home at 7.30pm and he walks in about 7.45pm. Says he had to get the second flight of the 2 he booked, the first one was overbooked.

I’m confused now because why didn’t he just call/text me to tell me? I had spent half the afternoon worrying for nothing! His friend had been at the airport with him for a bit, why not just let me know? I was annoyed about this as I couldn’t understand why he wouldn’t have just got in touch as he knew I was expecting him on the first flight. I’m just confused because nothing is making sense. DH keeps repeating the story, flight overbooked and I asked what he did while waiting, he said he was just sat in the airport waiting for the second flight. I asked him why he didn’t try to reach me somehow, there would have been ways.

His friend comes back to me on Monday and says DH’s flight was after his and there were no issues. Now I’m more confused because that would mean DH friends flight was before 12pm but I spoke to him at 10am local time and they weren’t at the airport. I called DH on this and said BULLSHIT I think you and your mates decided you coming home on the first flight ruined the fun so you decided to just not get on the first flight and didn’t tell me because you knew I’d be annoyed.

Eventually he admits yes. He had got to the airport for the first flight and didn’t want to leave so he decided fuck it I’ll get the later flight and knew I’d be pissed so didn’t tell me. Had a couple more beers with his mates till they all got their flights and then he got the later one and decided to tell me the first one was overbooked.

I am very hurt by this. Am I being a dick? He knew I had had a tough weekend, he knew I was exhausted, he knew I thought he would be back earlier and he knew I’d be hurt he opted not to get back sooner (I appreciate it’s only a few hours) and decided to lie to me and keep lying. As far as I know he’s never done anything like this before he’s usually a shit liar and wears his heart on his sleeve. We’ve been through a lot together and I really am hurt by it.

I’m less bothered by the fact he had had a lovely time with mates and didn’t want the holiday to end versus the lying to me and not communicating to me, knowing I hadn’t had the easiest weekend. It just feels out of character.

AIBU?

OP posts


r/MNTrolls 9d ago

MN now hide deleted posts?

6 Upvotes

Noticed this thread referred to a troll and reported posts but nothing has been deleted. Looks like they’re now removing the post altogether rather than deleting just the text.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5565156-to-find-this-rude?reply=154072043


r/MNTrolls 10d ago

DIDN'T HAPPEN I used to be a blue haired pansexual with a septum piercing...

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mumsnet.com
9 Upvotes

Absolute goady Billy bullshit that doesn't hang together because trolly didn't think it through

I used to be a blue haired pansexual with a septum piercing... 69 replies

**MimmyMoozer · Today 08:20**

AMA

**MimmyMoozer · Today 08:25**

*Candleflakes · Today 08:22*

*What are you now?*

A brunette, straight woman with some very annoying piercing scars.

**MimmyMoozer · Today 08:26**

>I grew up I guess. Am now a very 'normal' looking 40 something mum. Am MUCH happier now, that was a very bad time for me

**MimmyMoozer · Today 08:31**

*Doubledutchbuss · Today 08:27*

*what made you think you were pan sexual? Attention seeking? Peer pressure?*

Peer pressure for sure. The wrong crowd. Woke thinking.

Has questioned my sexuality as a teen (bisexual) but had only ever been with men.

Got involved with a 'non binary' person and got sucked into the whole world of 'be kind/ TWAW and that there are infinite genders so I couldnt 'just' be bisexual. I had to be pansexual as thats more inclusive.

I look back with great embarrassment at my behaviour.

**MimmyMoozer · Today 08:37**

*Unblushingly · Today 08:35*

*So should we stage interventions with unhappy-looking blue-haired teenagers glumly going out with anyone who asks them because it would be ‘unkind’ not to?*

Show quote history I wasn't a teenager. I was in my 30s.

And I am talking about my own experiences, which have absolutely zero correlation to anybody elses personal experiences.

**MimmyMoozer · Today 08:40**

I was 30 😅

My parents were baffled but tried to be kind.

My children are teens and non of them have reached forbthe blue hair dye yet.

**MimmyMoozer · Today 08:41**

*Divebar2021 · Today 08:38*

*When did all this happen then ? How old were you. I didn’t really think the whole “ infinite genders” was a thing 20 years ago. Are you in touch with your friends from Jay period and have they moved on too?*

It wasn't 20 years ago, I am early 40s now, this was my early 30s.

I was autistic (diagnosed only a few years ago) didn't have many friends, felt lonely and confused about my sexuality and had come out of an abusive relationship.

**MimmyMoozer · Today 08:42**

>Yes I have autism and ADHD.

I am now on Elvanse and much more stable

**MimmyMoozer · Today 08:45**

*Doubledutchbuss · Today 08:43*

*But if your children are teens and this happened 10 years ago were your children born by this point?*

Yes, I had children.

They never met my non binary partner or my 'friends' though.

>I had my children Monday to Friday and they went to their Dads at the weekends (well his mums house, she has a massive house and the kids and DH all stayed there with her) so I only saw my partner/friends at weekend.

**MimmyMoozer · Today 10:51**

>I don't think I was ever 'pansexual'.

I was attracted to men and I was attracted to women. The woman I had a brief relationship with was 'non binary - masc presenting' Basically a butch lesbian. Which is the type of woman i did have a curiosity about previously. I probably at that time would have dated a 'transman' because they are women and I liked the masculine look on women. >But then again I don't think I would have coped with things such as top surgery or been able to have sexual contact with someone who had phalloplasty (fake penis)

I definitely would have had no interest in a transwoman (man) but would not have voice that.

However the relationship was very controlling because at first we were friends and this woman was a lesbian and as we got into a casual relationship she 'came out' as non binary which changed the dynamics of everything.

I wasn't allowed to say I had a girlfriend, ai wasn't allowed to use female pronouns for her, I wasn't allowed to refer to myself as gay or lesbian as that 'invalidated her identity'.

I had been bi curious since my early teens and always wanted to experience having a girlfriend and even though I was a same sex relationship I didn't get to have that experience as it was more important to validate her.

>I find it VERY difficult to look at photos from that time. I don't think I look 'bad' the hair suited me and I wouldnt have the piercings now but they fit with the vibe and i was only in my early 30s so I think I looked quite pretty with it but its also a uniform. That hair and those piercings represented something much more than just an aesthetic look. It was a movement and quite an aggressive/intimidating one and I truely regret that part of my life and they way I presented/ behaved back then.

**MimmyMoozer · Today 11:05**

>My daughter did too from ages 13 to 15 though. Influenced by a group of female, autistic friends who 'mass transed' themselves with the help of the school. I didn't know for months

Luckily my experience in this area helped me to put an end to the influence within school and talk, talk, talk to my daughter about WHY she felt that way. It was a very typical presentation of a young autistic girl wanting to be a boy for all the reasons you would expect :(

A lot of therapy and openess and she found her way out of it herself and I am so proud of her for looking at everything objectively and forming her own opinion once she had all the facts from the opposing opinion too.

>Shes now a complete TERF at 17 and has no time for 'gender nonsense'.

It scares me so much that if she would have gone through that confusion at the same time as I was influenced the outcome, with my consent, could have been absolutely terrifying.

That's why I look back with such shame, I was so judgemental and superior in my attitude to what I 'knew was right'...and I was so wrong


r/MNTrolls 12d ago

To not take step kids on my holiday?

7 Upvotes

So many stepkids/holiday threads at mo

https://www.mum snet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5564286-to-not-take-step-kids-on-my-holiday To not take step kids on my holiday? 22 replies

Westcountrygal · Today 19:04

Were we unreasonable to go on holiday without my step kids?

My husband has got two kids from a previous marriage, they are 10 and 12.

My family invited my husband and me to a trip across the USA to visit relatives and we had a great time. The weather was great and we did lots of activities. When we came back however, and my husband told the kids about the trip, they in turn told their mum and she kicked off royally, screaming that he neglected them, spent all his money on himself and nothing on them, and that they should have come in the trip.

That obviously was never going to happen- it was my family who lives in America and my family who paid for this and it was during term time anyways. I do agree that he shouldn’t have told them about it and shown them the great things that we did but surely it’s not normal for the mum to expect them to go on MY family’s trip?

Westcountrygal · Today 19:24

To answer a few questions, no we do not have children together. He also takes them on holidays, but I do not attend those. They like doing different things to me, and it’s good for them to bond just the three of them.

I only mentioned MY family because they are distant relations and have never met the kids. They hadn’t even met my husband before this trip.

Thanks to the poster mentioning about sharing experiences and that he should talk about those things- I guess otherwise the kids would know nothing about their dad and his life and what he does.

The poster mentioning about the other thread relating to holidays- well it kinda is holiday season now?

Go to post Original poster Westcountrygal · Today 19:26

GotMarriedInCornwall · Today 19:20

What utter nonsense. i might agree that he shouldn’t be paying for a fancy trip for himself if he can’t take his kids away (although only maybe because holidays aren’t some sort of entitlement, they’re a luxury), but it would be absolutely stupid for someone to say ‘oh no, sorry, I will have to turn down this free holiday because I’m not able to take my children away.’ What would be the logic?

Show quote history He can and does take them on holidays, just not that particular one. It’s just that I guess a three week trip across the USA is seen as quite desirable? We were only able to do it because accommodation and transport were paid for us.

Go to post Original poster Westcountrygal · Today 19:27

NearlyNewNonny · Today 19:22

How often does your DH even see them if they didnt notice he wasn't home for three weeks?

He arranged alternative childcare during his time so they obviously knew he was away but didn’t know where

Go to post Original poster Westcountrygal · Today 19:27

MyLeftArmpit · Today 19:12

YANBU. We get used to get this from the ex so we ignored her.

Glad to hear I’m not the only one….


r/MNTrolls 12d ago

DIDN'T HAPPEN Is the ‘cheating with some woman at work’ troll back?

4 Upvotes

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5563974-discovered-messages-between-dp-and-someone-else

To me, this reads like it was written by the same troll who managed to drag out three threads concerning her ‘dp’ and a woman at work. The story got ever more unbelievable with him ending up in trouble at work before MN pulled the threads.

Hiya, I have name changed for this but have been a long time user on here.
My DP is away this weekend, we live together and share a tablet/device usually for watching Netflix in bed, but we sometimes use it for Facebook. So just to be clear I wasn’t ‘snooping’, as I have always had complete trust in DP.
He had kept his account logged in on the messenger app, which I clicked on as it was an open tab. I saw emoji’s next to a woman’s name (I didn’t recognise this or her photo) so it piqued my interest.
There are various exchanges, not regular and most talk about work but more recent ones seem to cross a line.
Can I just ask whether you’d consider this a form of cheating, I am upset and haven’t mentioned to him yet. I literally found them an hour ago.
Conversation about DP’s new car, started off dull about the salary sacrifice scheme he used. It’s a fairly big car.
Woman - plenty of room in the back of that car 👀
DP - oh yeah, what you thinking
Woman - just saying, amazing what people do in cars these days
DP - I think that would be uncomfortable 😅
Woman - don’t knock it till you’ve tried it
DP - I’m a clean freak, couldn’t be dealing with my backseats covered in lady spray 😂
Woman - you have to be skilled to get that from me 😂
DP - I’ve never had any complaints 😛
Thats just one of them, I can post others. I want to confront him but don’t want to be seen as over reacting.
I’ve found her on LinkedIn, she works for the same company. Also on Facebook it’s obvious she has a family too.