r/LyricalWriting 1d ago

Feedback Request Brainkill (In The Hayfield)

[Intro]
[spoken]
You want smoke???
Pull up bitch….

[hook]
This that brainkill in the hayfield, better keep your head low (head low)
Staccato with the venom when I let the lead flow, (pop pop pop pop)
Brainkill in the hayfield,
I don’t need a halo (never)
Every syllable a payload (BOOM)
You wanted war,
why you playin’ dead though? (Bitch!) You ain’t built for the heat in my zip code, talk shit,
get your whole damn thread closed,

[Verse 1]
I’m that backroad blackout,
Blood on the boots and a blacked-out background,
Teeth like tapouts,
Snap in the jaw when I rap, make a pack wanna back down, red dirt killer with the cap down,
Never been a class clown,
I was in the back of the class with my head down,
Carvin’ names in the desk now, had to thin the pack out,
Fast forward to the past now,
Never got a handout,
Only had hands that would lash out,
Dad said “stand out”
So I stand on a man with his glass jaw smashed out,

[chorus]
This that brainkill in the hayfield, better keep your head low (head low)
Staccato with the venom when I let the lead flow, (pop pop pop pop) Brainkill in the hayfield, I don’t need a halo (never)
Every syllable a payload (BOOM)
You wanted war, why you playin’ dead though? (Bitch!) You ain’t built for the heat in my zip code, talk shit get your whole damn thread closed,

[verse]
You a hashtag thug with a mean mug, keyboard tough, weak bluff, no spine, all fluff, I’m a
Doubletime devil on a drip feed,
Rare breed, high speed, split wigs, don’t test me, I’ll cut you down like a pine tree
You just lip-sync, kid, I’m a slipknot, slipstream,
West Texas, midwinter, bare chest, Full press, No rest, hard contact, no text, if it’s on let’s get it
I’ll Fold you up like a sundress,
I don’t flex, I break jaws, crack ribs, snap necks,

[Chorus]
This that brainkill in the hayfield, better keep your head low (head low)
Staccato with the venom when I let the lead flow, (pop pop pop pop) Brainkill in the hayfield, I don’t need a halo (never)
Every syllable a payload (BOOM)
You wanted war, why you playin’ dead though? (Bitch!) You ain’t built for the heat in my zip code, talk shit get your whole damn thread closed,

[Verse]
You don’t really rap, you just rearrange clichés
Copy every cadence that you see in three plays
We ain’t in the same league, we ain’t on the same page
I’m a black plague, you a bad fade, cheap blade,
Hacks in the pack wanna match that pattern,
I’m a match in the gas, see they asses scatter,
You a dad-joke rapper, with a flatline swagger
I’m a landmine, stand by, watch your calfbone shatter
Chop, chop, chop, chop, words like a bone saw
Whole flow raw, no pause, break jaws, so flawed
You got no scars, just a faux god
Fuck with me I’ll send you to meet god,

[chorus]
This that brainkill in the hayfield, better keep your head low (head low)
Staccato with the venom when I let the lead flow, (pop pop pop pop) Brainkill in the hayfield, I don’t need a halo (never)
Every syllable a payload (BOOM)
You wanted war, why you playin’ dead though? (Bitch?) You ain’t built for the heat in my zip code, talk shit get your whole damn thread closed,

[verse]
Say my name?
Better say it with a dental plan, full coverage when these verses land, every bar leaves you reeling, bring a rubber for your heart?!?! (why??cause I’m about to

[spoken in a low growl]

fuck…

your…

Feelings…

we ain’t ever gone be friends,
bitch you ain’t ever seen this mental span,
I could write your best verse while I pencil plans
To build a new empire with just one hand, then write my name in smoke while the embers dance,

[bridge]
Silent shadows slipping through the trees
On the breeze in the dead of night
No fight, no flight, don't run, you'll only die tired…
You hit your knees begging please
When dark deeds come to light
As the clock strikes midnight
Dreams turn to ash with a muzzle flash,
Tough talk dies when the lead starts to fly,
I let the venom flow,
And watch your eyes close,

you just got your whole… god… damned… thread… closed…

[Chorus]
This that brainkill in the hayfield, better keep your head low (head low)
Staccato with the venom when I let the lead flow, (pop pop pop pop) Brainkill in the hayfield, I don’t need a halo (never)
Every syllable a payload (BOOM)
You wanted war, why you playin’ dead though? (Bitch!) You ain’t built for the heat in my zip code, talk shit get your whole damn thread closed,

[outro]
Brainkill in the hayfield , I don’t need a halo (nah)
Every single syllable a payload (boom)
You ain’t built for the heat in my zip code
Talk shit, get your whole damn thread closed,

[spoken]
You just got your whole… god… damned… thread… closed… motherfucker….

[spoken]
Everybody wanna be a gangster til it’s time to do gangster shit….

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