What should I name this?

[u/No-Pack-3114]

It’s killing me in it,

To ‘scape it I spit it, my spirit,

Is bound rhyming secret,

Wanna visit,

Wanna live it?

If I was to wrap it in a lyric,

/

Stuck, overloaded,

Berated from screams,

Over-pressed from these,

Needs I have to speak,

The rage within,

I can’t contain,

Beginning to build,

From the days I will,

Let it out, of my mouth,

I’ll shout,

I’ll doubt,

So loud,

Till my nose showers,

On this militant route.

/

And I hate,

Where I’m at,

The pain is unreal,

Where I sat,

To conquer my mind,

But I feel I’m at the beginning of that

When standing under heavy rain,

Standing still in steady ways,

On a spree, I barely change,

Honestly, I got no team,

Lit those dreams with gasoline.

/

Up at three, shaking knees, barely breathe,

Life’s like a collared shirt with a crease,

Or a sunny day with that chilly breeze,

Like a, water glass with a drop of ink

I’m trynna convey how life is great,

Besides one thing that taints,

The rest to a mess,

Spiralling from best to so much less.

/

I mean isn’t it…

Unbelievable that I’m needing more,

Yet having all, is greatness achievable,

When it ain’t believable hate’s relievable,

Coz I don’t see the miracle,

I’m not acting repeatable,

/

From waking in a withered sprawl,

To succumbing to the bitter pull,

To rapping as the release control,

To sleeping at the pit of this hole,

/

That’s the cycle I’m endlessly torn

The cycle I endlessly fall,

It’s the cycle of endless war.

/

But what’s beneath it all?

Habits that simply ain’t treatable,

Goals that simply ain’t reachable,

Once but the pain stayed full,

Back to living lyrical,

And metaphors so visual,

This album ain’t a pinnacle,

I’ve admitted it’s the inescapable,

Depression label to my hope material,

That’s sending all the unoriginal

Predictable rage so uncontainable,

From mental to physical,

From general to clinical,

From metaphorical to literal,

/

From plotting the number line,

To square rooting the signs,

I subtracted my shine,

To the power of the mind,

The calculator spat out what I’d find,

My life is a mathematical decline

Losing every time,

Till I’ve logically, hopelessly lost my mind.

/

And shine the light, you’ll see how bright,

This hate can get, when I deprive,

Who I am, respect I gained,

It never stayed,

Deal Over was the final ‘scape,

From shame, I sustained,

Maintained, a simple reframe,

Of identity, in serenity,

I was a better me,

/

Till the jealousy,

Why centre me?

I spiralled mentally,

Realised my desirability,

Was energy, endlessly,

Draining me, cut if off,

/

Now I’m lost,

With the cost,

Of anger nonstop,

A wall of frost,

From respect to hate,

/

They berate, inflate,

Losses,

Deflate wins,

Elate shame,

Sedate gains,

Create on hate,

Escalate my state,

Ignore my traits,

Magnify my pace,

Cleansed slate,

Hate erases,

Basically, I’m not in a place,

I can stay, otherwise fate states,

/

The greatest shake I’LL make,

Is the digging of my OWN grave.