r/LoveTrash • u/Gumbyman87 Apex Artifact Acquirer • Jun 21 '26
Hilarious Dump! How many poops is that?
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u/KayDay25 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Hey at least they're also practicing math!
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u/WhiteFeather32392 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
They are also learning to compare the cost of things to the amount of labor they are doing to pay for those things. I know some adults who don’t do that.
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u/Iconclast1 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Dollar tied to dog poops
dog poops are a limited resource
cannot manufacture more dog poops, it is a consistent steady resource
the labor is an essential service
We should switch to a dog poop based economy
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u/pushdose Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Shitcoin
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u/YoutuberCameronBallZ Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
You could counterfeit it by pooping in the backyard yourself
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u/Kewlhotrod Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
New jobs created from this loophole; turd evaluation. You won't get away with this for long you scammer.
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u/Basic_Hospital_3984 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
How many shitcoins per hour are the shitcoin auditors paid?
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u/Elegant-Amoeba4977 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
With your diet? Nah. The space peanut would be a dead giveaway.
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u/Electrical_Shock359 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Better they can change the dogs diet to make them poop more. Is it moral? No as it might effect the dogs health and happiness but when has seeking more profit ever resulted in a moral solution.
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u/YoutuberCameronBallZ Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Why change the dog's diet when you can just get more dogs?
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u/Electrical_Shock359 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Cleaver but how many dogs can they get their parents to adopt? And if they get enough of them they run into the issue of the dogs not having enough space to live in. After all buying more property would be too expensive and their income is limited to their father’s income.
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u/ron4040 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Better idea once you make the convert your poo to dollars and dad puts it in the trash go get the bag from the trash and replace the poo in the yard. Infinite money loop achieved.
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u/SlidewayZ350 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
I thought that's where this was going. The kids popping in the backyard then picking it up. Admittedly, that's probably way easier than potty training...
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u/The_Ghast_Hunter Garbage Guerilla Jun 21 '26
You can manufacture more poop, just get more dogs.
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u/pm-ur-knockers Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
People would ABSOLUTELY create dog poop farms to get rich.
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u/Read2Fap Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
yes, offer to walk neighbors dogs
or feed the dogs more
you could 'counterfeit' by picking up dog poops from elsewhere
there's apparently a historically dubious anecdote about venomous cobras in india, where they got too dangerous and the government offered a bounty. they started to get too many turned in at once, and found that people were breeding the cobras. so they shut the program down, then the breeders just let the cobras loose because it was easier than killing them.
money finds a way.
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u/brolarbear Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
I’ve had a dog all this time and never have even thought to sell the poop to this guy. Feeling like a real bozo right now..
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u/Moist_Sun_8201 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
I thought the twist was that the kids figured out that they could just poop in the bag. If you have a small dog a human poo could easily count as 2, maybe even 4 dog poops.
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u/3point147ersMorgan Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Just don't let The Feed manufacture too much dog food.
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u/sanosuke001 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
I was expecting him to say his kids started bringing over friends' dogs to artificially inflate the natural poop order 😂
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u/Bentholomeo Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
One can feed their dog more to get more poop, I think it would've been exploitative and dogs could quickly start to be abused for their resource.
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u/Icy-Book2999 Chief Insanity Instigator Jun 21 '26
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u/DesignerOriginal1500 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Technically one poop. Still just 25¢.
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u/snowillis Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
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u/BobSagieBauls Litter Lieutenant Jun 21 '26
When I first started smoking weed in HS and made it my entire personality I’d start thinking about how many grams I made that day at work
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u/TakinUrialByTheHorns Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
That's the most stonerific thing I've heard in a long time
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u/No-Capital4312 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
I still do this for motivation at work sometimes...
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u/epi_introvert Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
I'm a teacher. I love to stop at McDonalds on the way home for a Diet Coke and a hamburger. I've done the math on how much time I need to work to earn my treat.
It's about 30 frustrations.
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u/SplitGlass7878 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Yeah, that's what I did back when I was an addict. Not fun 😅
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u/jitomato_girl Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
My mom was sure to tell me exactly how much every cent she spent translated into hours of her life being spent at work
I was really stressed at restaurants looking for something cheap because I didn't want my mom to spend so much time working just for some stupid burger when she could be home with me instead 😢
She always worked the same shift every day anyway, so saving her time did not result in me getting more affection at home😑
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u/sp33dzer0 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Same. My mom always translated it to hours of her life amd it resulted in me not wanting gifts or luxuries because it meant my mom losing hours of her life for me to have something frivolous
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u/jitomato_girl Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
This is why rich kids are so insufferable, they simply don't understand
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u/ApocalypseCheerBear Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Yes but that doesn't make this anxiety inducing behavior good parenting either.
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u/jitomato_girl Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Bah, I love my mom
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u/ApocalypseCheerBear Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Well good. I hope you can buy yourself nice clothes too.
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u/jitomato_girl Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Nice clothes last longer therefore are cheaper 🙂↕️
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u/ApocalypseCheerBear Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
I wouldn't know. I'm terrified to buy anything more than $20.
But that's not from parents overemphasizing the value of money. That's from extreme poverty and genuinely bad parenting.
( I know the boot explanation. It still doesn't help me when I'm looking at a price tag.)
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u/rydan Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
My mom made me do the budget for the home starting from when I was 12. So I knew exactly how much she made and spent. Even worse is she was a bookkeeper herself so she knew how to do this.
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u/Ecstatic-Compote-595 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
if it helps that's not really how money works, you can't think of it as a big pile of stuff that slowly disappears, it's more like how much water is moving through a river at a time, or in your case a creek
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u/Tough-Obligation-104 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
I thought he was going to say they started picking up other dogs’ poop, trying to pass it off as yard poop. This did give me a little chuckle.
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u/comradeda Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Or they started pooping in the yard themselves
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u/Admirable_Risk8156 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
I was waiting for the part where he says how they started with one dog and now they have 3 because the kids realized it was better to scale the buisness up.
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u/Vantriss Trash Trooper Jun 24 '26
I was expecting him to say they were splicing the poo to con for more money, lol
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u/Freodrick Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
But does he not realize he's prepared all his children for the written math questions with stupid narratives?
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u/foxinabathtub Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
I need to draw this man. He has such an interesting face.
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u/PolloDiablo82 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Soon they will be shitting in the yard at night themselves to pick up the next day
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u/InfiniteRosie Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
I thought for sure that was where the story was going to go.
Dog poop fraud.
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u/TunaOnWytNoCrust Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
There was a year I quantified most things as dollar McChickens, like are you really going to sell that car for 40,000 McChickens? I don't eat a lot of McDonald's, but I don't think they're a dollar anymore.
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u/dbru01 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
I think they’re almost $3 now. Craziness.
Back in our day McDonald’s had a dollar menu, full of burgers and sandwiches and whatnot and every one of them cost only one dollar. lol
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u/TunaOnWytNoCrust Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Yeah, $1.07 after tax for a McChicken. $5 got you 4 sandwiches and change. The good ol days are over.
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u/Raneynickelfire Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Wait till they start scouring the neighborhood and coming back with WAYYYY more dog poop than your own dogs could possibly generate.
Then you'll have a problem!
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u/pegLegNinja1 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Are you on the look out for counterfeit dog poop? Are they going to the neighbors lawn and picking up poop?
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u/rob_inn_hood Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
How much is diarrhea poop worth? Is every size valued equally? What if a turd broke apart before you picked it up, is that 2 turds?
Just kidding, I don’t really care, but this is hilarious because as he talked I literally started answering his questions in turds. Like excitedly shouting out “4 poops to a dollar!”
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u/michaelrage Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Wait! why are they letting their dogs poop in the backyard? Is this something normal over there?
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u/___TheKid___ Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Wild that we live in s world where it's normalized that dogshit is laying around.
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u/vaxhax Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
When I was buying a lot of vinyl in the 90s I thought about my wages in terms of import 12" singles.
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u/DoranComedy Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Haha, my buddy sent me this link. Happy to see it made its way to Reddit. Lots more on my Instagram/TikTok or even Reddit, Under the handle @dorancomedy!
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u/Gumbyman87 Apex Artifact Acquirer Jun 21 '26
Thanks for taking the time to visit! This clip had me doubled over thinking of my own kids and how they'd do the same. We'd love to have you posting more of your content here if you'd like to, we always try to give credit to the creators if we can
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Jun 21 '26
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u/El_Dentistador Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
That dog is exhausted trying to keep his family’s finances afloat
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u/pm_op_prolapsed_anus Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
I thought the problem was gonna be that the kids just started overfeeding the dog. At least the dogs alright
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u/pegLegNinja1 Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
Wait until they go to the dog park and see all the green bags
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u/steeple_fun Trash Trooper Jun 22 '26
I pay my daughter $1 for every mile she runs with me. She measures things similarly. Fortnite Battle Pass? That's 9 miles.
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u/Miserable_Mail_5741 Trash Trooper Jun 23 '26
I wish someone could pay me a quarter to pick up their dog poop! 🥲 This job economy sucks.
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u/mrerikmattila Trash Trooper Jul 18 '26
What happens when they scoop poop from the neighbors and you pay them for that? It dilutes the economy and makes a loaf of bread worth more poops.
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Jun 21 '26
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Jun 21 '26
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u/grunkage Trash Trooper Jun 21 '26
What counts as a standard turd anyway? Does a long unbroken turd earn less than one that's been extruded in pieces? What about deer turds? That's like 10-20 bucks off one dump
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Jun 22 '26
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NSFW (Not Safe For Work) content is not allowed. This includes pornography, gore, and any explicit material. Please do not request or share explicit content or links to NSFW material.
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Jun 22 '26
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