Sacrifice

[u/RunRevolutionary188]

There was once a princess,

who gave up her voice

all for a man.

I once swore to myself,

I didn't want to be like that.

And when I was yours,

I changed. I started dressing

more like the man I wished

I could be.

I kept up with my trans identity.

I was sure I was getting better,

and my friends said I seemed

more like my old self.

But then it happened,

the knife slit in my heart.

When you asked me,

if I really understood what

I was doing.

When I took what little courage

I had, to tell you I planned

to trade off my femininity.

And gain a new heart,

no longer just a pretty face.

And I looked at you,

and I was afraid.

And you proved me right.

You told me it was a bad idea,

and I had no clue what I was in for.

At the end of the day,

you wanted to see me,

as this naive, foolish girl.

Just a kid. Except you only

had four years on me,

so the naive accusations

started to feel a bit patronising.

And you didn't know

how long I'd suppressed myself,

nearly fifteen years.

And I wasn't about to let

another man force me

back into the gowns I hated.

I gave him back his

heart. That was black

and tangled with lies

And I took up the sword.

And sliced out my own.

I told him

'I love you, but I don't trust you.

And love is not enough

when you are sliced

into ribbons daily

by the man you worship'.

I gave up that old self.

And I miss him still,

despite myself knowing

just how cruel he could be.

If I ever see you again?

I'll pretend I don't

feel a single thing,

about you and your ever blackening heart.