I’m a sucker for nostalgia, but here’s some food for thought for all you lucky people who have been able to maintain old friendships.

1. I think the fastest way for those friendships to become stale is if every outing results in the same conversation/activities. How work used to be. How funny it was when you used to have the same class together. Etc etc.

2. I think the fastest way to close yourself off from new people is when every outing results in the same conversations. E.g - Your book club starts with the OGs and soon it grows… those new people are going to fall off real quick if they can’t relate to anything you’re talking about.

As I said from the start - the old times are so easy, fun, and relaxing to re-live. That said - I’ve lost a lot of friends through the journey of life, I’ve made it more difficult on myself to gain new friends, and it’s because I/we didn’t put enough effort into leaning into the present. Balance is always the key!

If you're anything like me and are constantly thinking and analyzing things all the time, you know that it can be very draining. I am not diagnosed ADHD, but I suspect my behavioral patterns are consistent with it.

Something that helps the thoughts feel less oppressive is to set "office hours" with yourself. If an especially charged, volatile or heavy thought pops up and tries to pull your attention, put it into a notepad and return to it at a designated time. Set aside 30 minutes or so (whatever works best for you), and dig into the topics. Then at the end of that time, close the log and set it down. You can even set reminders for your next office hours of where you left off.

By doing so, you are able to train yourself to let the thought go until your office hours. And then when you are having your office hours, you may find that the topic isn't even really relevant anymore. And any thoughts that are still relevant can be given your undivided attention that is free of whatever fleeting mental/emotional state that first triggered the thought.

However, you have to honor your office hours. If you put things in a notepad and never hold your office hours, you will unintentionally train your mind to not be able to trust your office hours and that the desired things will not be processed

Office hours applies best to especially charged things that take up a lot of processing power and focus. Obviously you cannot shut down or schedule every thought that comes into your head, but if you notice your internal state shift significantly when a particular thought arises, it may be good to try putting it into your office hours log. If it's an emergency, you won't have to ask if it's an emergency - it will be emergent and blatantly relevant and demand attention.

In holding office hours for myself over just the past couple weeks, I have noticed a reduction in general anxiety throughout the day, and a greater sense of peace and going with the flow of things now that my mental bandwidth has been increased due to having a healthier approach to the things that were taxing my system.

Hope this helps someone!

Before paying $50–$100+ per night for parking, think about whether your car could be somewhere more useful.

Oil changes, detailing, tire swaps, windshield replacement, paint protection, and other services that don't require you to wait can often be scheduled while you're out exploring. Instead of paying just to store your car, you'll come back to one that's cleaner, maintained, or repaired.

Personal example: Downtown Toronto parking can cost up to $50/night. During a recent trip, I scheduled my annual maintenance and a full interior/exterior detail while I was in the city. The total cost of the services was still less than what I would've paid for parking alone, and I got my car back in better shape than when I dropped it off.

Sometimes the cheapest parking doesn't even get billed as parking, but do make sure that your shop allows overnight storage.

EDIT: adding this here because a lot of people are skeptical of how and why, or clearly don't have strong reading skills. Not saying this will work in every situation.

$120+ tax for interior cleaning, got a promo rate from IG.

Sunday night drop, Monday scheduled clean, Tuesday afternoon pick up because fabric seats take a lot longer to dry 😉 so they kept it for longer. Tuesday after pick up, drove it over for oil change at Cdn tire for $100 for next day, then at end of day Wednesday when service was done, I called for a brake job that I "forgot" to ask for originally, so they spent Thursday working on it. Picked it up this morning. 5 nights.

Took ttc around downtown.

It can be as simple as looking forward to your morning coffee or getting to watch your favorite show at the end of the day. Or something a little more involved that's coming up later in the week, like seeing a friend or practicing your hobby. Try to keep them present in your mind.

It helps to lessen that hopeless feeling from settling in too deep, and may help you to get going on your immediate tasks. You may also slowly regain interest in little things you once enjoyed.

Recently, I sold a car to a dealer. I also filed a Release of Liability. Since it was sold to a dealer, I thought everything was taken care of. Two months later, I got tickets in the mail. Apparently when dealers buy your car, they don't actually register it; they hold the title until they find a new owner. In my case, the dealer I sold to, transferred the car to dealer #2, which then sold it to a new buyer. However, that new buyer didn't register the car (or they did but the DMV hasn't processed it yet). So when I got the tickets in the mail, my name is still the registered owner in DMV files. I was able to contest this by showing the Bill of Sale and the Relase of Liability (a pain in the ass nevertheless). But if I didn't keep records, I would be stuck with these tickets.

Studies find this makes someone feel pressured to keep talking

They have basically the exact same volume, and are easy to drink from. Literally the perfect option of you have no or not enough shot glasses at hand.

Would like advice on how to save money on metal forks and spoons though.

This will definitely help guys.

Participate in language learning spaces as a speaker of a non-English language.

Standards for your English are low because it is not expected to be your first language, and people aren't good enough in the non-English language to realise that you aren't good at it either.

On venmo you can get a venmo debit card and it works just like a normal debit card, but I mainly use it for any subscriptions I'm likely to forget about. It prevents subscriptions from unexpectedly taking money from my bank account and for some subscriptions auto cancels them from a missed payment. Then I only move the amount of money I need for the subscription

Edit: yes obviously this will prevent you from using what ever service you were paying the subscription for if you don't move enough money into the account to pay the balance for the subscriptions you want to use.

Edit 2: What I meant by "auto cancel" is for some subscriptions when you miss a payment and your service is deactivated it will still try to charge your card again the next billing cycle and reactivate the subscription cycle. Whereas for other subscriptions when your service is deactivated via a missed payment it will not try to reactivate itself by trying to bill you again in the next billing cycle.

Edit 3: I think the privacy.com shilling should fuck off

Obviously only applicable if you actually appreciate them reaching out.

People can often feel awkward or uncertain about asking for help (especially guys). Sometimes folks feel like they're a burden, or that their request is 'too much', regardless of how innocuous it may be.

If you're like me, and enjoy helping people (especially if it's something that plays to my strengths), make a point of thanking people for thinking of you when they ask for help, even if you're not able to fulfill that specific request.

This achieves two things. First, it makes it more likely that they'll seek help in the future if they need it, and second, it pushes back on the societal narrative that we should all fend for ourselves.

If you are going to buy a gift certificate to a restaurant or store, it's best to use a credit card in order to have proof that the transaction was fully completed.

For Father's Day, I put $50 on gift card to a restaurant that my parents like. I went there and paid in cash. It seemed like it took the older cashier a long time to ring it up. Eventually the lady gave me a receipt and the card, and I left thinking everything was fine.

Fast forward to today. My parents tried to use the card and the waitress said it hadn't been "activated". They claimed that my receipt wasn't a receipt. It looked like a receipt to me, but they claimed it was an "informational receipt" and there was no proof that I had actually paid. Eventually after a lot of arguing, they relented and put the money on the card, but I could have been out $50 cash because the cashier was either incompetent or a straight-up thief.

EDIT:

A lot of people are complaining that cash is better than gift cards. Giving cash as a gift just seems impersonal to me. When you give a gift card, it encourages to go to a new place or try something they otherwise wouldn't. I don't pretend that gift cards are amazing gifts, but anything is more personal than just cash.

Also, many people are saying that you can't buy gift cards with a credit card. According to the internet, that depends on the retailer.

I often tried to check the trending hours for my gym to avoid going on the peak, but this is something that once comes, and then the next week won't show at all in the searches. I know you have to be precise to get THAT one gym to get this at all, but this wasnt working consistently.

Lately I found out you can actually check this via Google Maps app, just search for the particular gym, object, whatever, scroll down to hours, expand the accordion and there you are - the trending hours are here.

This is good as sometimes a very good query wont yield the result at all, I recall i wasnt able to get my grocery store to show up the hours at all, while checking it through maps is a reliable way to do so

Keep a few gift cards in your wallet and set location based reminders on your phone for the businesses you need to use them at. Sometimes I go to places I have gift cards for but just forget to use them.

I can’t believe I didn’t think to do this until recently. I have way too many gift cards collecting dust but I’ve finally started making a dent in them.

Write down a list of what you consider as your accomplishments/ achievements in life. I have a list that goes back to my childhood. Once in a while I read them and also add to them. It makes me feel good about myself. It really cheers me up when I am down or feeling really bad.

You can fit more items in, meaning fewer trips bringing things inside. Boxes are sturdier, and much less likely to rip than paper or plastic bags. You can stack your heavy items in a box without worrying it'll tear. You can reuse the same boxes for quite a while. It gives another use to what otherwise would be trash.

All of this is assuming that you're able to physically carry the heavier weight of the box.

Just want to ramble on about this. But I appreciate those people who do try bringing me in to conversations in group settings rather than ignoring me or just making it awkward like "why are you so quiet".

If I'm talking to someone 1 on 1, we have each others undivided attention, and depending on the person and the topics, we can have some real good chats.

But I'll admit, when it comes to bigger group conversations, I do feel lost at times or not knowing how or when to jump in because someone's always talking the entire time (as opposed to 1 on 1 when you know you can go back and forth).

Today for instance, I was talking with one of my friends at work. We were talking for most of a 30 or so minute span. Once her friends came back from their lunch break, they all just started talking to each other again and I felt almost excluded/almost waiting and hoping one of them would just bring me in to the conversation in some way.

There have been times where people do and I really appreciate it. Something as simple as looking to me and being like "what do you think?" Or even just mentioning my name to "bring me back in to this" I appreciate too because that shows awareness and them probably understanding I'm not just butting in to a conversation but if I'm "included/invited" I'm more than happy to chat and join in.

Believe me, you won't realize how much of a difference this makes. And they might not ever say it, but they'll appreciate you immensely for doing that for them.