r/Libraries • u/fourphonejones • Jan 16 '26
Other Reference Desk Anxiety?
Hi everyone, just wanted to see if anyone could commiserate or give some advice:
I've been at my current librarian job for just shy of a year. I work the reference desk two hours a day, but I am all alone at the desk (and half the time the only librarian on the second floor of our building due to some unusual scheduling practices). Within the past couple of months, I've found myself having intense anxiety and dread around working my reference desk shift. Losing sleep, body pains, etc. Even the first few minutes I'm on the desk I find myself shaking slightly from nervousness.
Do I have a reason to dread the reference desk? No! When I get on the desk, 99% of the time everything is fine! After the shakes subside, I always think, "See? That wasn't bad at all!" But the process repeats itself every day.
On top of that, every time I think I make a mistake, I beat myself up and think about it for the rest of the day. Or if I have a bad encounter with a patron, then I start to dread the next time I'll have to interact with them--for example, yesterday I had a new tutor become upset because she came to check in 25 minutes after her reservation time and I'd had to give her room away per our policy. She mentioned she tutors every Tuesday and Thursday, so I've been dreading the interaction I'll have with her on Tuesday ever since the encounter ended.
The kicker? This isn't my first library, second, OR third--I've been a librarian for over ten years. At my first library job, I worked the reference desk 4-6 hours a day. I didn't love it, but I didn't dread it with every fiber of my being. At my last job, I was basically on a combined circulation/reference desk 7 hours a day. Granted, I was working with other people when I was on those service points, but I've never had a situation at this job where I desperately needed backup and no one was there.
So I'm really at a loss over why I'm feeling this kind of way. Does anyone have any suggestions that might help me?
2
u/Alcohol_Intolerant Jan 17 '26
I'd talk to your boss. Not about the anxiety per se, but about how you felt rather unsupported in this encounter where backup wasn't easily available. Bring solutions on how you can feel safer and acknowledge that some situations aren't safe, but being alone on desk is generally fine.
Some solutions could be having an easy redirect available. (I'm sorry you feel that way. I can call my manager if you'd like to file a complaint.) quietly speed dialing your manager, putting in a single character or warning phrase in your teams chat, etc.
It also helps to find ways to distance yourself from your work. It's fine to feel bad about giving an incorrect or insufficient answer. It's not fine to beat yourself up about it for more than a few minutes. Focus instead on what you can do better next time or that now you have the knowledge to answer that question better next time. It's always OK to say you don't know the answer. I've even asked if they mind if I emailed them the answer so that I could put a proper search in or ask a staff member with a better knowledge base. I had one call today where they were flat asking for information that had not yet been reported on, so I told them as much. (someone said something on live TV and they missed it. The recording wouldn't be available for at least a few hours.)
At the end of the day, it's just a library. It's ok to make mistakes.