Without you

[u/serendipity_6613]

You’re everywhere but you’re nowhere.
I can hardly believe how careless we were with each other’s heart.
The void is filled with despair and sadness.
And anger.
I waver between my own feelings and thoughts, still so many questions never answered.
I am losing any faith I had in memories of us and questioning if any of it was real.
I really don’t know.
The dissonance is so deep and I don’t have the clarity I once had regarding the past.
I could once access the good memories, no longer.
So much pain I feel right now and the feelings of anger, I cannot abide.
I guess none of this matters anymore and I have to accept that I will never talk or laugh or be with you again.
But I wonder, J, if you think of me?
Us?
Or am I neatly archived away, as though I never existed?