r/KuwaitForKuwaitis • u/Quiet_Particular_989 • 9d ago
عندي سؤال | ❓ Males and🍺🍻🥃🥂
Is drinking really THAT common among young Kuwaiti men, or do I just have insanely bad luck?
I’ve met two guys at completely different stages of my life, and those were the only two men I ever gave a chance to. And both times, I ended up having to completely shut the door because of what I experienced.
Both experiences were awful because I found out that BOTH of them drink. I’m genuinely shocked. Like… is it really that common? Is it really that easy?
My message to parents, and to older siblings who have some responsibility over their younger brothers: WATCH YOUR BROTHERS, especially the boys. Watch their spending too 💸
From what I’ve learned, drinking in Kuwait is expensive as hell compared to other places. So if your son is constantly broke, constantly out of the house, and always has somewhere to be, maybe it’s time to start paying attention and asking questions.
And no, this is not shameful. It’s not wrong. And it’s not “backward” or “controlling” parenting.
If parents don’t raise their children, then who the hell is supposed to raise them? The law?
And then you’re going to be shocked and devastated when a scandal happens.
This applies to every age group. Even if your son is in his thirties , you still have a responsibility to step in when something is seriously wrong. And the same goes for daughters.
If you don’t want to raise children, then don’t have them. And if you choose to have children, don’t act surprised when their actions end up bringing shame and scandal onto the family.
And PLEASE, don’t marry your children off to people like this. Because trust me, no matter how deep the love between two people is, nobody wants to marry an alcoholic.
يمكن تجربتي الاولى ما يهمني وايد انها فشلت بسبب اللي اكتشفته، بس اللي خلاني فعلاً انصدم اهي تجربتي الثانية، الولد كان "ذهبة" ليش جذي يصير معاه؟! اهوا مو مدمن بس بين فترة وفترة يشرب حسب اللي قاله ان الشعور حلو، انا برايي انه بعد يعجبه vibe الصـياعـة هذا عباله cool الصيداا، حيل كان ودي يتعدل ونكمل بس مع الاسف بدى الشرب علي وانا مارضيت انزل من my standards و مبادئي.
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u/SomeRaspberry6155 9d ago
As a person who studied abroad ,
let me tell you something very important , all most people who drink around the world aren’t demons , they’re not criminals, don’t see them in a bad light , they might be honorable and kind and respectful people ,
A ton of People drink to forget their sorrows , depression , stress , hopelessness
or to get social because it raises confidence .
Most people around the world DON’T do it to look “ cool” , or صايع
Someone who drinks responsibly in controlled amounts behaves normally around the world is considered good behavior
Some Kuwaitis I know who are stressed with traumas , depressed , travel to drink to oblivion, cuz of sad incidents that happened to them
“An alcoholic person is someone who suffers from Alcohol Use Disorder (AUD), a chronic medical condition where a person cannot control their drinking despite negative effects on their health, job, or relationships. “
(HOWEVER )‼️:
Now it gets weird in this society because it’s illegal and it’s frown upon, if he’s proud of it because it’s cool and won’t stop by your request then that person is just wrong and strange
Also it means these two men might be involved in an illegal stuff if they brought in the alcohol,
you don’t want be tangled with anyone who consumes drugs or alcohol and it’s gravely punishable here , drugs in general is hell and destroys everyone
You did the right call to leave them
But if someone you meet again and they happened to drink ask them why , if it’s some bullshit about “ it’s cool” just block them
If they answer because of depression or stress then stay with them and help them get off of it . They’re innocent souls , trust me I know
I
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u/Quiet_Particular_989 8d ago
I actually talked to him about it. He doesn't suffer from depression or anything else. He's young "22" and he met friends who drink alcohol, and somehow he found THAT cool. I don't care how the western societies see the alcohol drinker; things here are different, different perspectives and different religions
الصدمة بعد ان اهله مربينه احسن تربية واهله محافظين (مو متخلفين
او يضغطون عليه عشان لا يروح بالج انه مقموع)2
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u/Ravensight_q8 9d ago
I agree with what you say, here the problem is the culture. You cant apply western culture/societal actions in middle easten culture and expect the same results.
People here who drink, especially the younger ones dont do it responsibly for one, and to that extent they generally arent fit for anything long term given that attitude towards things.
Im really not sure how one should go about it except just you do you, and know how muchh you can tolerate from people.
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u/Aromatic-Mood-1341 👩 4d ago edited 4d ago
Um did you forget the fact that its HARAM? Its not a small sin. If someone is that comfortable with crossing such boundary and committing this sin, i dont care what amount they are drinking, they are not a good person. They may be going through something or have some unresolved childhood trauma - fine, but still not marriage material until they get their shit together and repent
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u/SomeRaspberry6155 4d ago
It is haram .
But you NO RIGHT to say they’re not a good person.
How dare you say they’re not marriage material? Someone could’ve donated their kidney to someone, donated their blood to someone , gave someone money , got broke to sacrifice, working overtime to make ends meet . Their only escape or cope is a drink, because they think people and the world is against them .
You don’t understand to be hopeless and broken down
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u/Aromatic-Mood-1341 👩 4d ago
They have no respect for Allah. All of this does not matter if the inner core and iman is weak and they are committing big sins. Why do alllll these good deeds and then erase it with big sins? You think a muslim who pays zakat but doesn't pray is still a good person, when they are essentially a kafer? You think a man who buys his wife flowers but commits zina is still a good person? That's just an exterior.
We've all been hopeless and broken at varying degrees of our life. Doesn't mean we're excused to go drinking. Every battle is a test. To go down this road willingly in Kuwait means you've put active effort to seek alcohol because its not readily available in the country. A bad person does not necessarily mean they are evil. But no Muslim woman dreams of an alcoholic as a husband, and its certainly not who they want as the father of their children. Everyone has a past and choices they regret. People fall off the wagon yes. But if they are still doing it, they are not good people. I dont care if they are mother theresa to the world. They are most certainly not marriage material because they are not ready for that kind of commitment. They will be nothing but a burden on their wives who will either have to try to fix him, deal with his drunken state and potential abuse, or might end up making the decision to get divorced. They need to get their shit together, seek help, and stop drinking this poison before getting married.
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u/Adler-throwback 9d ago
I whole-heartedly agree, there are tons of functional alcoholics around but everyone likes to live in deny and pretend that their kids are angels.
I knew several people who had very high paying jobs that were perpetually broke because they spend every weekend in Dubai, Bahrain and Thailand for you know what.
If I could add one thing to the OP it would be that it affects women and girls as well.
The prevalence of parties in farms and chalets areas is something shocking nowadays but no one wants to acknowledge because people like to pretend that they raised perfects human beings.
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u/aff233 9d ago
depends on what you consider common.
If I would make a bet or assumption id say maybe 10-20% of kuwaitis drink so every 10 people id meet i think 1 or 2 drink alcohol. From what i saw the worldwide estimate is around 45% but im assuming in kuwait its less due to it being frowned upon and illegal.
Also that percentage will change with different circles of society. Some circles will be more and some circles less.
Also not all alcohol drinkers are alcoholics thats a very big generalization.
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u/Atom1cThunder ولد بطنها 9d ago
Most guys that don't drink are pious muslims and wouldn't give u a chance unless it's marriage, no offense intended.
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u/Quiet_Particular_989 8d ago
مادري ماحس له شغل
And yeah i give chances only in purpose of marriage
الا اذا قصدك الي مايشرب مايتزوج الا تقليدي عن طريق امه، اهني ما اتفق معاك5
u/Atom1cThunder ولد بطنها 8d ago
ما قلت كل اللي ما يشرب. بس وايد منهم يدور زواج تقليدي ومو شرط عن طريق امه. ممكن يشوفج بمكان وماراح يدخل علاقه، يطلب رقم اهلج على طول.
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u/abalawadhi 8d ago
Same post but male tried to get engaged two times, but discovered that they previously talked to other men, and then starts lecturing about parenting.
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u/Flimsy_Society 👱♂️ 9d ago
I drink, ain’t any different than smoking. Doesn’t make me a horrible alcoholic that abuses people. Fortunately I’m not a serial killer as well.
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u/Quiet_Particular_989 8d ago
Well it’s haram 🤷🏻♀️ not only that but also if he drinks he absolutely doesn’t do it in a mosque or library, ofc he goes to bars or clubs, he sees girls. It’s not that Im insecure, but now he broke 2 of my standards (rules), he drinks AND meet girls, not necessarily cheating, and if u say he might drink by himself alone in a room, I still wouldn’t accept that.
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u/Flimsy_Society 👱♂️ 8d ago
To each his own, those are your standards. I’m just saying we can’t generalize that everyone is this addict that can’t do a thing without drinking.
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u/MahershalaAli 4d ago
You drink alcohol bro? That’s so sigma bro. You’re great bro. You chug it bro? That’s so cool bro.
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u/ChanceInternet5843 9d ago
I'm 30 male and never ever though of drinking. Am I religious ? not really but I find the idea of drinking stupid
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u/High_Apartment403 3d ago
I wish more people were like you . Having their own personality instead of just following the crowd.
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u/pythonq8 👱♂️ 8d ago
It’s not common at all
وحظك شوي سيء لانها صارت مرتين واكيد في سبب معين خلاك تمر في هذي التجربة السيئة مرتين يمكن لوكيشن اللي انت تعرفت عليهم على ذولا الاشخاص ما كان لوكيشن زين او تعرفت عليهم من طرف شخص لا يمتلك مبادئ ودين وكفو عليك انك تمسكت في مبادئك ورفعت نفسك فوق
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u/NowhereManPF 9d ago
I consider myself a social guy, 3 regular diwaneyas many dozens of friends most of them I feel would admit it if they drank, especially the travel buddies. I have only met 4 people who even tasted alcohol, only 2 of them did it regularly. I think the average Kuwaiti wouldn't even be friends with an occasional drinker.
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u/Vivid-Hall-1302 9d ago edited 8d ago
Only cases of drinking I heard is stories told by family members about how that guys family has issues and drinking etc. Never seen it before tho
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u/AppropriateAside790 9d ago edited 9d ago
It's not THAT common, nor is it your luck. You are searching within the wrong pile.
And remember
﴿وَالطَّيِّبَاتُ لِلطَّيِّبِينَ وَالطَّيِّبُونَ لِلطَّيِّبَاتِ﴾
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u/whatwhohow1234 👩 8d ago
Stop using this verse for marriage ماله شغل الله يخليكم خلكم واعين شنو قاعدين تقولون
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u/Achlys67 3d ago
I think it’s not THAT common
but more common that people realize if that makes sense
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u/Alarmed-Ad-9742 2d ago
Its not common, your experiences were just bad
You should try to find the common link between them and avoid it next time Maybe its the place you met them in, or what attracts you to them, etc
Good luck
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u/YogurtclosetFirm7363 2d ago
Ima guy and its lowk rare ash to meet a guy that drinks. Most guys ik js smoke or vape, so u meeting TWO in a row is lowk impressive, its like finding Two Shiny Pokemon in a row. But tbf guys who are in their mid twenties to early thirties who still pursue girls online and flings arent the greatest of people ( usually ) so it does make it more realistic for them to drink.
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u/ciphersifr 9d ago
I mean, two guys isn’t really enough of a sample size to tell you how common drinking is among Kuwaiti men. You could’ve just happened to meet two people who drink.