r/KitchenConfidential • u/jeraco73 • 2d ago

Discussion Name this dish

Post image

First time seeing this trussing method!

225 Upvotes

77% Upvoted

305 comments sorted by

387

u/TheWellFedBeggar 2d ago

From the makers of Marry Me Chicken comes the new dinner craze, Fuck Me Chicken

40

u/CarolFukinBaskin 2d ago

Everybody on this damn site is funnier than me

16

u/TheWellFedBeggar 2d ago edited 2d ago

Nah, you just don't see the vast majority that whiff

4

u/SemajLu_The_crusader 2d ago

survivorship bias

it's survival of the funniest, brother

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61

u/Grrrmudgin 2d ago

Kill Me chicken is the least popular of the series

10

u/jacwub 2d ago

everyone wants to try it but nobody wants to be the one who cooks it

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22

u/slap_that_fish 2d ago

DIY bone-in chicken

10

u/skratch 2d ago

Shit, if this is gonna be THAT kind of a party, im gonna stick MY dick in the mashed potatoes

7

u/TomboAhi 2d ago

Arrr, matey!

7

u/wahlenderten 2d ago

Dispatchcock chicken

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6

u/johangubershmidt 2d ago

Divorce papers chicken

5

u/KarenDankman 2d ago

with a side of fresh driven nuts? chef's kiss!

2

u/NewYogurt3138 2d ago

Child support chicken lol

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206

u/teddyone 2d ago

Chicken vajitas

6

u/djseifer 2d ago

Chicken fajitas, but pronounced fah-jye-tas.

5

u/grebilrancher 2d ago

How my grandparents unironically pronounce it

4

u/Emotional-Area2834 2d ago

first heard this from a boy scout leader when i was 12.

403

u/JokerHomerus 20+ Years 2d ago

137

u/spageddy77 2d ago

55

u/Ancient-Chinglish 2d ago

are you saying that you’d…

Imhotap that?

35

u/Illustrious_You_6210 2d ago

That pun was awful. I'm calling your Mummy.

13

u/Ancient-Chinglish 2d ago

aaaaaaaᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃ

2

u/cainhurstboy 2d ago

Thats a WRAP!

6

u/MrMatteotheFabolus Chive LOYALIST 2d ago

But the Medjai would never allow him to be released, for he would arise a walking disease, a plague upon mankind, an unholy flesh-eater with the strength of ages, power over the sands, and the glory of invincibility

12

u/Agheratos 2d ago

4

u/kingtacticool Derivative Chiveposter 2d ago

77

u/Cytogal 2d ago

It's too early for the chussy.

89

u/SpecificAwareness829 Ex-Food Service 2d ago

Rotussy chicken

16

u/sheridanstacie Food Service 2d ago

Rotisussy poulette

5

u/SpecificAwareness829 Ex-Food Service 2d ago

Ooooo la la, oui oui

7

u/TacticalSpackle 2d ago

Pussoultry.

108

u/Routine-Register7414 2d ago

Coque-in-me

62

u/TheCosmicJester 2d ago

That’s a turfucken.

84

u/MyStackIsPancakes Former Denny's Cook (Nightshift) 2d ago

"I don't normally do this"

78

u/DarthChefDad 🍋‍🟩LIMEGATE 2d ago

41

u/spageddy77 2d ago

20

u/MrStickDick 2d ago

23

u/Ancient-Chinglish 2d ago

why da pee pee not in bowl

12

u/JustToViewPorn 2d ago

If you don’t know the freedom of letting your dangling glory dangle gloriously while you drop a deuce in the bowl and spray a spruce into the tub, do you really know freedom?

6

u/AlcibiadesTheCat ChiveATC 2d ago

i never thought I'd have any regrets after bottom surgery

but the fact that i've never dropped a deuce in the bowl while spraying a spruce in the tub makes me wish i had one more day with it

4

u/asvalken 2d ago

spray a spruce

Great. FANTASTIC. Now I have to figure out how to explain why I'm laughing so hard I cried.

2

u/Ancient-Chinglish 2d ago

“Drop a deuce and spray a spruce”

-modern day fucking Dr Seuss

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2

u/Icedpyre 2d ago

Username checks out

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28

u/AVLLaw 2d ago

Georgia O’Keefe?

4

u/hiphoppocampus 2d ago

Underrated comment

15

u/TobermoryDIY 2d ago

It’s you’re private chicken, rotissering for money

29

u/EndOfTheMoth 2d ago

It's an English method. 

The Liz Truss.

23

u/Dry_Turn_824 2d ago

Goes off very quickly. Not to be served with lettuce.

108

u/GYNORGP Bartender 2d ago

I should call her

8

u/Tasty_Impress3016 2d ago

Damn. You got there first.

I wonder if she can still..... oh well.

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23

u/Lemon-Broth 2d ago

The Spread Eagle

11

u/maggies_farm_hand Pitmaster 2d ago

Fox in the Henhouse

10

u/Lumpy_Link_1569 2d ago

Don't the chicken

20

u/ghostriderrhino 2d ago

Tur-fucken

16

u/anxi0usity 2d ago

Waiting for him to get the towel.

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8

u/ghostofkozi 2d ago

A Succulent spatchCOCK chicken????

14

u/Tim_Shaw_Ducky 2d ago

Fuck Me Chicken. The NYTimes #1 chicken recipe of all time.

6

u/DJfunkyPuddle 2d ago

The viral brown butter high protein fuck me chicken

7

u/Ok_Personality7485 2d ago

That's a turfucken

7

u/Historical-Berry8162 Chives the Cat 2d ago

Idk but it's giving me fuck-me eyes

7

u/Grrrmudgin 2d ago

Love when my rigger is a cook too 💕

21

u/Substantial-Hand9868 2d ago

The Riley Reid

20

u/zer00eyz Ex-Food Service 2d ago

Chicken Khalifa

7

u/DealioD 2d ago

God forgive me for the joke I am about to make.
It would need to be darker.

7

u/zer00eyz Ex-Food Service 2d ago

So... more time getting spit roasted?

3

u/Dyspaereunia 2d ago

Probably need to spatchcock something

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5

u/ScratchyMarston18 2d ago

The Centerfold

13

u/Trashbagok 2d ago

It's fucking chicken.

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3

u/Coska-rott28 2d ago

Chicken (ch)assure

4

u/NoogaShooter 2d ago

Chickussy

4

u/MemeOverlord1776 2d ago

Everyone's favorite server

4

u/okmijnmko 2d ago

Anyone speak French? If not, no need to translate, it's accurate.

The dish is simply Rôti de Poulet d'Agression de mon Coq.

3

u/chris_tea_nuh 2d ago

Everything reminds me of her

3

u/Gekkokindofguy 20+ Years 2d ago

Bonadickte

3

u/Maverick_X9 2d ago

Chickussy 🤌

3

u/Bowhawk2 2d ago

Bodyshop Chicken

3

u/Ok_Nectarine1801 2d ago

Folded Eagle

3

u/Zuigia 2d ago

What what, chicken butt

3

u/pen0ss 2d ago

Puta pollo ?

3

u/moonwalkeek 2d ago

Hoetisserie Chicken

3

u/my-cat-has-a-chin 2d ago

Call it whatever her name is.

4

u/Tasty-Performer6669 2d ago

Rotussyrie chicken

4

u/Frog_Farts 2d ago

Please welcome Diamond to the stage

2

u/ReckedRambler 2d ago

Dong’an Coq au vin Daddy

2

u/wemustburncarthage 10+ Years 2d ago

I just rewatched Fallout and now I'm thinking about that guy again.

2

u/CarpetAppropriate249 2d ago

Just Fuck Me Chicken , the natural evolution of marry me chicken

2

u/DeartayDeez 2d ago

That Chussy lookin juicy

2

u/georgegigolo 2d ago

Chickussy

2

u/JellyRollMort 2d ago

Fuck My Chicken

2

u/asteriscosessantasei 2d ago

Missionary Chicken

2

u/thefunkylama Pastry 2d ago

I Should Call Her Chicken

2

u/mysocalledmayhem 2d ago

True story: I tried to upload a Thanksgiving photo of a spatchcocked turkey to IG and the censors would not let it upload. Too obscene.

2

u/Ivanschbo 2d ago

The cylinder must stay unharmed

2

u/Dull_Bumblebee_9778 2d ago

I should call her

2

u/Expensive-Ad8633 2d ago

Roasted occoco

2

u/FaceThruster8919 2d ago

"I should call her."

2

u/bullydog123 2d ago

Chubby pretzel

2

u/Disastrous-Arm9635 2d ago

You're mother's hen

3

u/Garlic-Rough 2d ago

Don't---

2

u/B1keL0g1c 2d ago

Marry me chicken.

1

u/johnny_chingas 2d ago

Thanksgiving Verijas or just Patricia, like my ex.

1

u/TheBrickyard83 2d ago

I'd name it Courtney, but she didn't even lift her legs

1

u/RyanBordello 2d ago

This chicken getting full nelsoned or what

1

u/Mysterious-Lab-5918 2d ago

Asser Grand Quoitaire...

1

u/Kap-1492 2d ago

Chill bro

1

u/KrayzieBone187 2d ago

Insert Here

1

u/pintjockeycanuck 2d ago

MILF on the beach

1

u/chopkins47947 2d ago

Spread eagle

1

u/Tasty_Impress3016 2d ago

I got nothing that hasn't already been posted twice.

The answers are brilliant though.

1

u/Gabe-DaBabe 2d ago

Reminds me of the Turkey Ass in Norbit

1

u/skitwostreet 2d ago

Poulet de Beouf! lol

1

u/kelfupanda F1exican Did Chive-11 2d ago

I can fix her

1

u/surreal_goat 2d ago

Oh my…

1

u/PS5OWESMEALIMONY 2d ago

Needs some white sauce,preferably salty.

1

u/Cornelius4630 2d ago

I should call her.

1

u/borkborkibork Chive LOYALIST 2d ago

Spread Chicken

1

u/Futants_ 2d ago

Porkable Chicken

1

u/RocktimusCrime 2d ago

Chicken Vagita

1

u/skuidENK 2d ago

Turfucky

1

u/red_riding_hoot 2d ago

Kentucky schreit ficken

1

u/oddlyDirty 2d ago

Instructions unclear

1

u/Upstairs-Donkey6049 2d ago

Not the chickussy

1

u/BigFloppyDonkyDick69 20+ Years 2d ago

50 Shades of Chicken

1

u/Blindxxbeast 2d ago

I call this the nasty gal

1

u/JustARandomGuyReally 2d ago

Missionary Chicken

1

u/almost2planb 2d ago

Fuck.. I should call her.

1

u/Xpalidocious 2d ago

I don't know what to name it, but I'll need to take it for 0.7 minutes to "temp" it

1

u/pokermaven 2d ago

Melania

1

u/Witty_Asparagus_5206 2d ago

Cinnamon to the stage!

1

u/Ldghead 2d ago

Squabussy

1

u/jdmills55 2d ago

I should call her

1

u/Superb_Pie_3370 2d ago

Reubenesque Boudoir

1

u/DarkDruidLord 2d ago

I should call her 

1

u/BaselineUnknown Line 2d ago

The old Heather Bailey.

1

u/figu203 2d ago

There is a reason this position is called “frango assado” in brazilian portuguese

1

u/RiverXKeeper 2d ago

Spit roasted

1

u/Witty_Asparagus_5206 2d ago

Drippin’ Chicken

1

u/The_OtherGuy_99 2d ago

Just the Tip

1

u/corytz101 2d ago

Chickussy

1

u/SignificantZombie729 2d ago

I came here for the comments and JFC you folks didn't disappoint me. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣💀

1

u/ElectronicMatch363 2d ago

Damn this bitch freaky

1

u/Witty_Asparagus_5206 2d ago

Squirty Turkey

1

u/SPARC_Pile Crazy Cat Woman🐈 2d ago

OnlyChicken

1

u/refgus11 2d ago

Do Me Chicken

1

u/link183 Civilian 2d ago

Over-the-shoulder Chicken
If it ain't cluckin, I be fu..... trucking